Friend mad because I sat down to have coffee

[trekking1]

Please tell me if I am being BU or is she.

Made plans with two friends to go on a walk this morning. Me and one friend arrive on time, the other one is late. Neither of us had coffee this morning so we sat down in the nearest coffee shop and told our friend to meet us there. She arrives, orders coffee and food (this info will be important later) and after we go on the walk. Everything was completely fine during the walk, but when I got home I received a fuming message from her!

She said that we knew she was broke and that's why she wanted to go on a walk and it was really insensitive that we sat down to have coffee forcing her to spend money. I responded no one forced her to have anything as she could have just had water and that if I need coffee because I haven't had one this morning, it's unreasonable to expect I'm gonna give up having one because of her.

Her reply was that she felt forced to order something because the staff would judge her. I told her I used to work customer service so I can guarantee you they don't care if one person among a group of 3 does not order anything. Then I asked her if she is so broke, why on earth did she order coffee AND food?😂I got no reply.

Actually no as I have offered to pay for her when she previously complained about being broke and she said no

I know one or two like that.
They hate admitting they are broke so go big on the lunch out or whatever. Couldnt be seen to be broke, thats worse than the actual reality of being broke.
But to message you after? Nah id not be bothering with her again she sounds like she has more issues than Vogue.

Well even if she misunderstands the rules of cafes - fine not to order if you're only there for a few minutes and someone else from your party already has - she could have waited outside until you finished or she definitely didn't need to order food.

Sounds like a very OTT response from your friend - has she got other stuff going on that may have compounded her mood and caused her to lash out at you?
Whatever, it sounds like an argument to close down quickly and move on from.

The whole thing is bizarre. You do sound quite mean to be laughing at her like this, tho I agree she also sounds awful.

My friends and I help each other out if someone is struggling financially. And we do agree beforehand if we are going for a meal or drinks or whatever for this reason.

But nonetheless it seems weird to buy coffee and food in these circumstances, be fine on the walk, then send the angry text later.

Doesn't sound like you like her anyway so why do you keep seeing her?

I presume the OP is laughing as it’s bizarre of her friend to claim to be broke but then order more than she needed to, if the only reason she bought it was to save face. Good for you OP on pulling her up on her ridiculousness.

To be clear, I didn't laugh at her for being broke, I laughed at her bizarre message. I mean she really claimed with a straight face that I forced her, a grown woman, to buy coffee and food!

Come on now. Admit it. You had a pistol in your coat pocket pointed at her. And a hole in the pocket to squirt the water through.

I don't think it sounds as though OP doesn't like the friend. Friend's behaviour this morning was odd. Going on about being broke (as OP says friend does) is irritating. Friends do sometimes have annoying characteristics which cause us to question our reactions.

Does she have a controlling arse of a boyfriend who she has a joint account with?

How did you come to that conclusion? Wouldn't most people in the postiton have just joined their friends and waited for them to finish without buying anything? If anyone asked, a 'I've had enough coffee this morning' would have sufficed, surely?

Ridiculous how people are jumping on the op.

Her friend can't be that broke to order a coffee AND food.

A laughing emoji is hardly rubbing it in her face.

@trekking1

then tell her that if she comes back to you again!

she's a melt anyway, she didn't need to even order a drink when she joined you both, let alone food. That's all on her, not you,

she needs to take responsibility for her actions, not blame everyone else!!

oh and forewarned- do not go on holiday with her !

Agree is that broke she would have ordered just a coffee for £3 or so

Not a cake /Sarnie as well

How old is she? Being curious as she sounds like a child

Why are people insisting the OP doesn’t like her? She just sounds immature and wet and OP says, why buy not just one, but two things if you’re that broke?

A joint holiday would be I’ll-advised.

30+

Was she the only one who ordered food?

No, she is single

Are you on the wrong thread?

Then she's just trying to blame you for her poor life choices

Don't go on holiday say you don't want to pressure her into spending