to think that people who b*tch about other people's weddings are just sad, sad, sad..

[Saveme]

..and probably jealous, and really should just shut the f*ck up.

Can you tell I'm bored of the wedding bitching that keeps popping up on here?

Unless you're being asked to pay for it, then it's not your problem.

However, everyone's got an opinion on everything on here. You'll get used to it!

I agree hecate. It's just so bloody tedious, the same old crap again and again. Always comes across looking like sour grapes no matter the alleged "issue".

Nah, I don't know what you are referring to exactly, but weddings bring out the worst in women. Perfectly normal, intelligent, reasonable women suddenly turn into brain dead egotistical eejits when there is a big dress involved and they deserve to be mocked as it is so, so silly.

Carmenere, you're illustrating what I'm referring to

Well said Carmenere.

Bridezillas should be mocked. It is our sisterly duty to save them from a wifetime of hysterical self-interest, and a creaking mantelpiece of photos of them on THEIR day.

When's your wedding, Saveme?

Message withdrawn

Oh, I'm not getting married. I've just noticed a lot of wedding-related bile on here, which I find rather sad. Just another example of how women just love to bring each other down I guess. I've never heard a man bitching about a mate's wedding.

Oh yes, Bridezilla, that's another good example of the bitching I'm referring to. Quick, label someone a bridezilla and you can bitch about her to your hearts content and feel no shame about it.

The whole "bridezilla" thing, while once a funny description of a particular kind of behaviour has turned into just another nasty form of misogyny, just another way to castigate and ridicule women.

Isn't that what weddings are for then? Pardon, you thought they were about publicly pledging your loyalty to another? Nah, they're just a good excuse for people to judge your taste, hairstyle, budget and aspirations, dahling

O FGS Chequers you know who I am talking about, the ones who are obsessed with their big day the ones who want it to be perfect and will tantrum if it doesn't live up to their expectation. I have no problem with the brides who keep perspective on the whole shebang.

Message withdrawn

but most brides keep perspective and yet brides in general are suspected of being hysterical, unreasonable, selfish and manipulative Bridezillas.

Men would bring each other down if the groom harped on endlessly about his big day and had near fist fights with the best man over the colour of his buttonhole.

Weddings are lovely. Hurray for the lovely couple and thank you for inviting me. I wish you a lifetime of happiness together and here is a toaster, with love.

Women - because alas, it usually is women - who go nuts and get obsessive and boring and lose their minds and all sense of perspective about a wedding, not a marriage, well, they are bores in extremis imo and should be mocked like the petty egotists they are.

I'm not talking about those who say, what do you think of this dress? but the ones who demand you give up a precious Saturday to trudge around 85 shops and watch your once normal mate try on 497 near identical dresses, leaving you snow blind and dizzy, and then shriek You know which one I'm talking about! It was in the 47th shop, the 89th one I tried on after the frilly one with lace a tenth of an inch longer than this one you halfwit! Don't you care how I look? Do you want me to look like a fucker waddling down the aisle? Do you hate me that much?

[valium]

Agree skidoodle it's not most brides.

Agree skidoodle, and wedding planning seems pretty stressful with a lot of people to please. The whole bridezilla myth just seems to be an excuse to take pot-shots and feel no shame about it. It's like people think they have a licence to generically be rude about brides now.

WT, you really need to get some new friends.
To the OP, no I don't think YABU but weddings, especially of the larger variety do tend to bring out the worst in people imo.

Message withdrawn

if you are going to titter at grown woman obsessing over wedding fonts, menus, flowers - do it privately

some brides morph into chuntering veil wearing scary harpies obsessed by the details and minutiae.. face it no one really cares about wedding favours,seating plans etc faffing and tittering about trivia that lasts for one day is deeply annoying and that's what irks.

but guests should turn up, be gracious, not be overly demanding. oh and aware someone is paying well over the odds to feed them and provide hospitality

My mum went to a teachers wedding at my DS school. What did my mum say when I asked her about it??? - "Oh you know she's a big girl, and you should've seen the size of her arms - as big as my thighs and she should've had them covered up......" etc etc. I asked her if she looked pretty "Yes she was and her dress was nice... but it would've looked better on her a few sizes smaller" I could have screamed at my mum - such bitchy comments, rather than trying to see more of the good over the small bit of negative. But that's my mum - she focuses in on the 'what's not right' rather than on the 'what is right'

Congratulations to the teacher!

That reminds me of a wedding I went to where the normally tomboyish bride looked absolutely stunning. I commented to one of the groom's friends on how lovely she looked, and the response was: "well, the sun shines on every dogs arse once in a blue moon"

Nasty.

But why is this unique to weddings? Don't women bitch about all sorts all of the time? You hear it everywhere, about everything, and it comes in all shades from the relatively minor dig, to the out and out bitching.

People bitch about other people's houses "I wouldn't want to live in a box", other people's choice of partners "what does she see in him?", about other people's children, "They don't know how to control their child" or "I don't want my child to play with that child, its the wrong sort of kid", or about other people's parenting skills "the debates around dummies, bitching about kids with snotty faces or dirty clothes" bitching about other mums - "helicopter parent, yummy mummy, the mothers who are OTT with their PFB, those that 'drag their kids up'", you hear women bitch about what other women wear "She's far too old to wear a skirt like that". I could continue and give hundreds of examples... but believe me, its not limited to weddings.... Its just something women do (about everything!)

Oh and men do it to!

Thehedgewitch, I totally agree!

The union of yourself and the man you want to spend the rest of your life with should be exactly how you want it, maybe some people get a bit carried away with napkin colours and the like but deciding a way you would like to have your wedding is surely your prerogative?