he is fuming & broke up with me

[AIBUfolk]

My partner has just broken up with me. I can understand why he is annoyed but to break up with me?

He owed his cousin £50 from earlier today (it's not that he didn't have money they were out together and he forgot his wallet at home) this cousin of his and i do not get along what's so ever. We haven't spoke in years, she makes my blood boil and I know I make hers boil too. We had a run in years ago and she attacked me , long story short she's an animal. His cousin and him are very close , he would class her more as a sister.

ANYWAY, dp had asked me if he gave me her bank details would i bank her £50 and he would give me it cash as his online banking was down , I said no 1000x as i hate her too much I don't want my name on her transactions. I'm well aware I sound petty but I'm sure she would hate to see my name also. I gave in but I popped in the reference as "forced transaction" and sent the money, DP was absolutely furious, shouted at me that were done and stormed off too bed.

I'm well aware this all sounds childish and petty. But he knows we can't stand each other. The transaction wasn't exactly forced but if I hadn't of done it I would of had to of listen to dp cry 🙄 the "forced translation" was definitely me being smart as I just can't with this woman, I can't be bitter enough.

I just hope the bank doesn't pick up the reference it won't look to good...

Jesus. What?!

This, I'm afraid.

I can bear a grudge myself in the sense that it takes me a long time to forgive someone who has "shafted" me, and even after forgiving, I don't forget - however, I can be civil to keep life pleasant, and I wouldn't penalise a third party (your DP) to make a point.

This is one of the most chavvy posts I have ever read. His online banking was down? What bollocks, you simply open your banking app and make a transaction.
You sound much better off without either of them in your life. They sound gross.

I think nationwide and Halifax were both down yesterday for pals. (Yes our group chat is that interesting!)

But yeah he's shagging his cousin and I'm guessing the money went on coke.
Keep it ended. Stay safe.

Forget about the 50 quid and be glad is over.

How old are you all? Never read anything so pathetic on here.

The snobbery & sneering here... Peak MN

OP - the father of your child was out on mothers day with someone else, spending money that wasn't on you. That person is psychotic towards you & has assaulted you - whilst pregnant.

Your other half sounds like a prick & you're better off without him. Leave him to shag his own cousin (which some PPs might want to remember is a far more upper class tradition 😉)

I think you’re better off out of it.

It’s not reasonable of him to hang around with someone who attacked you and gets her children shout abuse at you. That’s not a partner.

Plus putting pressure on you to transfer money - why couldn’t it wait until his banking was working? If they’re like siblings surely she’d understand.

I don’t see why you’re getting such a hard time! A bit childish to put those words as your reference but equally it’s a sign of an unhealthy relationship if you feel forced into things.

Oh dear. Grow up.

As others say, he sounds like he has no bank account. Forgot his wallet-then online banking down?!. Sorry, but he needs to pay you back. Also, why would she lend him £50 and require it to be paid back the very same day?
I think he may be financially very shifty, and the fact you wrote 'forced transaction' gave him the fear, like he's in trouble for fraud or with the police already. Could be wrong but the whole thing seems so weird.
Get the money back and never speak to any of these people again.

Is there seriously any future in this relationship if you think she has a child by your partner?

I feel very sorry for the actual children involved with these parents.

That's a good point if he had cash in his wallet. Do they do coke together op? He didn't respect your boundaries and doesn't seem to have much respect for you in general.
Embrace the break up, do you live together? What practical steps do you need to take? I'm guessing he can move in with his cousin.

Agree with @Testina

I'd be furious if my DP claimed a transaction was forced. I'd worry that I'd be accused of financial abuse, police involved etc. Highly unlikely but would cross my mind

If you hate her this much and they are close you are so much better breaking up with him so you have nothing to do with her anymore

No, she acted in an angry and combative way towards someone who physically attacked her when pressured to do something nice for said person by her manipulative oh.

Your problem here op is being in a relationship with someone who loves/has higher regard for someone who attacked you more than he does you.

Ditch.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who took that from the story!

It all sounds toxic. I don't understand why you stayed with a man who has family who assuage you in the first place if he prioritises their relationship over yours?

Your relationship was never going to survive your level of hatred towards his de facto sister so you're both better off out of it. He's stuck in the middle and wanted out, and I don't blame him.

If she is like a sister to him she could have waited for his Internet banking to resolve itself or he could have found an alternative payment method such as PayPal.

Yanbu albeit childish with the "forced transaction " bit - I would have refused outright and told him to sort it another way - either asking his cousin to wait, finding alt methods or going back out with his wallet to get the cash to her directly- he should not.have involved you given the history and now he has thrown his relationship away - you are well rid imo - I would worry that she will poison him against you and make co-parenting hard.

You're the cover story for their quasi incestuous relationship OP. Also, you're not going to see that 50 quid again, unless you tell the bank when they call that yes, it was a forced transaction and please can you have it back.

He didn't forget his money and then magically find his internet banking was down. That's balls too.

I am a bit curious myself.

So much to unpick with this!
Maybe it's best you've broken up.

I've never seen a poster on here be insulted, ridiculed and sneered at so much for being upset at being physically attacked while pregnant, or for struggling to leave a relationship she shouldn't be in.

What the fuck is happening?

I think you're all a bit young for a relationship...