Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect DH to not go to football training?

337 replies

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 09:56

I have a tummy tuck consultation on Friday and DS has football training (DH is an assistant coach) all of the consultations are on a Friday so it means I will never be able to go. DH is refusing to miss any training days to allow me to go to the consultation.

He won’t let my mum come and babysit the kids either as he doesn’t want her at our house apparently.

I feel like he is just doing to to stop me from going! He keeps saying it’s a waste of money and I should be spending it on the kids and our family not myself.

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 04/03/2024 09:57

Do you allow him to run your life?

AnneLovesGilbert · 04/03/2024 09:57

He won’t let my mum come and babysit the kids either as he doesn’t want her at our house apparently.

What?

OneAtATime · 04/03/2024 09:58

He sounds controlling. Why is your mum not allowed in the house?

WandaWonder · 04/03/2024 09:58

You can expect the sun to come up tomorrow doesn't mean it will

Babsexxx · 04/03/2024 09:59

Wtf he won’t let your mum in your house???? Ay why are you married? What a tosspot.

RedHelenB · 04/03/2024 09:59

Take the kids to your mums then or dh takes them along to football training.

StopTheBusINeedAWeeWeeAWeeWeeBagOChips · 04/03/2024 10:00

Just get your mum to babysit, he won't be there anyway.

Smartiepants79 · 04/03/2024 10:01

Is he right about the use of the money? That aside he does NOT get to decide if you leave your own children with your mother. Presuming there is no back story about how awful she is.

SingaporeSlinky · 04/03/2024 10:01

Don’t think is real, but if it is, wouldn’t football training be in the evening after school? Can’t you get a morning consultation?

Original poster
mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:01

My mum lives an hour away so means she will have to stay for the night and he doesn’t want that.

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 04/03/2024 10:02

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:01

My mum lives an hour away so means she will have to stay for the night and he doesn’t want that.

So his Choice is her there for a night, or he has them, simple.
Is there a backstory about money that’s driving this?

WaltzingWaters · 04/03/2024 10:02

I mean the big thing here seems to be him not wanting your mum watching the kids/at your house. Is there a backstory to this and she’s horrible/unstable or something? Or is he just being a controlling dick?

Original poster
mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:02

Training is at 6pm and I have to travel up to Manchester for 7 for my appointment. I’m working until 4ish so will leave right away. But he is flat out refusing!

OP posts:
WaltzingWaters · 04/03/2024 10:03

Ah cross post. So he’s just being a dick.

He can either have the kids himself or let your mum stay the night.

StopTheBusINeedAWeeWeeAWeeWeeBagOChips · 04/03/2024 10:03

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:02

Training is at 6pm and I have to travel up to Manchester for 7 for my appointment. I’m working until 4ish so will leave right away. But he is flat out refusing!

Who has the kids while you're at work?

Choice4567 · 04/03/2024 10:04

But why doesn’t he want your mum staying the night? And why does he get the final decision on this?

DustyLee123 · 04/03/2024 10:04

I’m going to assume that he’d be no help after the surgery either?

Original poster
mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:04

So I am the main breadwinner and he works part time. He has some debts about 10k in total he has it in payment plan. He thinks I should be putting 5k towards the debt instead.

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 04/03/2024 10:05

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:04

So I am the main breadwinner and he works part time. He has some debts about 10k in total he has it in payment plan. He thinks I should be putting 5k towards the debt instead.

I bet he does 🤣🤣🤣

Original poster
mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:05

No my mum is lovely! She stayed with us last weekend he just hates having her here as “he can’t relax” but it’s only for a night.

OP posts:
StopTheBusINeedAWeeWeeAWeeWeeBagOChips · 04/03/2024 10:05

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:04

So I am the main breadwinner and he works part time. He has some debts about 10k in total he has it in payment plan. He thinks I should be putting 5k towards the debt instead.

🤣🤣 I don't know whether to be horrified or impressed by the brass neck on him.

ClawdeenWolf · 04/03/2024 10:06

He sounds like a prick, mate. I'd bin him.

Isitbedtimeyet3 · 04/03/2024 10:06

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 09:56

I have a tummy tuck consultation on Friday and DS has football training (DH is an assistant coach) all of the consultations are on a Friday so it means I will never be able to go. DH is refusing to miss any training days to allow me to go to the consultation.

He won’t let my mum come and babysit the kids either as he doesn’t want her at our house apparently.

I feel like he is just doing to to stop me from going! He keeps saying it’s a waste of money and I should be spending it on the kids and our family not myself.

He sounds like an absolute dickhead

cuckyplunt · 04/03/2024 10:06

It’s a private appointment, book it when it suits everyone.. I wouldn’t expect my DH to give up his hobby because I wanted to do something like this, just move the appointment.

WaltzingWaters · 04/03/2024 10:07

mrsfruitloop · 04/03/2024 10:04

So I am the main breadwinner and he works part time. He has some debts about 10k in total he has it in payment plan. He thinks I should be putting 5k towards the debt instead.

And while he’s not working full time what is he doing? Having the kids? Housework? Studying? Or just wracking up debt whilst you’re at work?