To be absolutely stoned with my 6 yr old?

[hanginglikefawkes]

We live a really normal sensible life usually. But my son has autism. I spent years without sleep , emailing schools, tracking his development .usually tonight is my night off, I work in a very demanding industry and I’m perpetually drained but dad has him on a Saturday night. I usually attack a bottle of wine, a Camberwell carrot and then just relax. Tonight dad is ill and I’ve been handed back my son , and he’s absolutely happy and gorgeous, and we’ve spent the last hour mirroring on the guitar. We’ve then had some food and I’ve just put him to bed .ive never been in charge of my son when im under the influence though. I feel like we’re fine. He is fast asleep and cosy in his room , im still anxious though. Obviously I stopped drinking and smoking when he came home. It’s just a weird situation for me, these two things are so dichotomised.

Do you reckon they would say “no child deserves an alcoholic as a mother” to someone having the odd gin and tonic?

This. You're just inviting a pile on.

I assume OP you are OK with those in Mexico, other parts of central America and nearer home who are murdered because of the illegal drugs trade. Happy to see young disproportionately black men stabbed or worse.

No excuse for your indirect racism.

This

She didn’t think she’d be looking after her child, he was with his dad. A few joints here and there isn’t anything to get your knickers in a twist over, just as a couple of glasses of wine is totally ok. I say this as someone who’s been sober for five years :)

I know right!

@PurpleChrayn
you don’t have to be a Martyr when you’re a mum you know!

@takemeawayagain

OP doesn’t sound remotely dysfunctional to me.
Have you actually read her posts??

basically what you’re saying is that when you have kids you have to stop having fun. No thanks.

Morning everyone and thanks for your comments. Just finished breakfast and logged in to see quite a few comments concerning addictions and drug dealers and whatnot. Thought I’d clear that up… senior lecturer at a university, bonkers existence to be honest because it’s in the arts so there’s lots of off site and out of hours functions. I spend around £20 a month on my one joint a week and purchase it from another senior lecturer who grows it on his Dutch barge. There aren’t, to my knowledge any real drug dealers in this leafy suburban ‘village’ we call home. Just lots of overpriced vegan cafes.
I’ve been smoking about this much, and this often for over 20 years and I'm extremely healthy and have written about 40-60% of my published works while slightly toked up. Yesterday evening I was rather enthusiastically stoned and had a fair bit to drink too which is why it felt very off needing to suddenly parent. By all accounts, I did a stellar job though as the young chap has devoured his pancakes and demanded we cycle along the canal into the city so he can indulge in his hobby. I’m game, so definitely no worse for wear.
I totally agree with the posters who pointed out that cannabis, compared with alcohol is incredibly safe and was criminalised purely for political reasons. There’s some wonderful quotes by Nixon admitting that it was about oppressing certain ethnic groups.
So, no offence to those who view it in the same terms as crack and heroin or say it’s a gateway. Anyone who manages to fuck themselves up and ruin their lives on cannabis would most definitely have managed to do it with something else. The problem lies in the mental health of the individual and not being functional enough to use it sporadically and sensibly .Also see: buying it off an old hippie academic and not some tracksuited goon that’s sprayed it with chemicals.
Off to freeze my arse off now so DS can do his thing. Have a good day all.

You didn't do it on purpose, and couldn't have predicted your son coming home. Crazy how some people judge someone for spending a very precious evening alone doing whatever they want to do. Hope you had a lovely time once the paranoia left OP.

You sound like you’re doing a great job of life and parenting in challenging circumstances.

Enjoy your Sunday!

I was thinking this. How can he suddenly be that ill?

I would contest the notion though that a leafy suburban ‘village’ won’t be a hotbed of drug dealing. I used to live in a picture perfect village and even though I actually came from a big sprawling town, I’d never seen drugs or even been offered them until I lived in that village.

For everyone saying it can’t be helped WTF!! Yes it can, no sorry I can’t take him tonight, ask a family member, if this was the other way about you’d be slating the father. Shame on for taking drugs while looking after a child, shame on you for taking drugs at all. No one needs drugs cause they work a high pressured job!!! Excuses

You’re right of course, there’s cocaine everywhere. But I don’t like pubs and I’m a miserable old hippie that doesn’t really socialise outside of my own circles which allows me to remain oblivious. I’ve got more houseplants than friends and I like it that way. The rural ends of south Devon are hothead for real nasties like ketamine I’m told.

Wasn't going to reply as I just really hate the way certain drugs are always aggressively defended on here (and by the same people who'd freak if a cigarette was smoked within 5 miles of their child), but OP's update explaining how she's not like the riff-raff with their icky psychosis and addiction... just ugh.

The lady doth protest too much.

There's more homegrown than there's ever been, you numpty.

Buying chocolate on the other hand, even if it's labelled otherwise, is supporting child slavery.

Good to know what our university tuition fees are funding 😁

😂

Exactly.

I'd be curious to know if people are this cautious of what they eat and wear or ever if they know how their electronics are made.

Sorry haven’t read the full thread although have read all the OPs posts. I’m not at all judgy about drugs etc I think for me the issue is a lot of people think they can keep up their casual (harmless) habit with a growing toddler in tow.

My question to you all? What happens though the teen years. Are you going to keep your stash under lock and key? What if your DC samples it in your absence? What if their teen friends find it when you are out shopping? And pass it round and they all become unwell? And it becomes a safeguarding issue. And you are the unwittingly source of it?
How will you hold the line against your Dc dabbling? Or won’t you?

agree 100%. Lots of people on here with a naive view of what cannabis does to lives. The lives of the user and the lives of the drug trade suppliers.

lol to ‘you don’t know where she bought it from, OP might source it organically from the local fair trade farm’

YABU. Being in sole charge of a 6 yo when 'absolutely stoned' is fucking awful whether you're a middle class aging hippy lecturer working in 'a very hard industry' or whether you're a poor parent struggling to make ends meet. You should have told the ex that you couldn't look after your child. What would he have done if you'd been away? How did the child even get to yours? Please tell me you didn't drive.

I'm intrigued about the barge-growing lecturer. Cannabis grows take up a lot of space (even just a couple of plants) and loads of electric. Unless it's a big boat with a powerful generator?

Bet there’s loads of uni lecturers on here trying to figure out who these stoner characters are. The barge is quite specific info OP. 🤔