To be absolutely stoned with my 6 yr old?

[hanginglikefawkes]

We live a really normal sensible life usually. But my son has autism. I spent years without sleep , emailing schools, tracking his development .usually tonight is my night off, I work in a very demanding industry and I’m perpetually drained but dad has him on a Saturday night. I usually attack a bottle of wine, a Camberwell carrot and then just relax. Tonight dad is ill and I’ve been handed back my son , and he’s absolutely happy and gorgeous, and we’ve spent the last hour mirroring on the guitar. We’ve then had some food and I’ve just put him to bed .ive never been in charge of my son when im under the influence though. I feel like we’re fine. He is fast asleep and cosy in his room , im still anxious though. Obviously I stopped drinking and smoking when he came home. It’s just a weird situation for me, these two things are so dichotomised.

😂

Here we go.

I’m a single mum with 100% parental care (father went abroad). Kids grown now but I didn’t go out for years. I smoked a bit of weed when I was younger but I wouldn’t have with children (it stinks so much now, not like when I used to have it). But then I don’t really drink either and don’t like pubs etc. I’m just terminally dull lol.

Class As no. Fully wasted on alcohol no. Absolutely out of your mind stoned, no. But a couple of glasses and a bit of a smoke you’re absolutely fine. Enjoy your buzz x

We have no idea how sick the dad was, who brought their son back, how long whoever it was interacted with OP at the door, or what the relationship between her and her ex is like and people aren’t commenting on it because it wasn’t the point of the post. Plenty of separated couples are happy to do each other favours and behave like equal parents with no “boiling alive in guilt” required from any party.

Obviously it was unintentional. I’d be annoyed with dad personally. But I guess you could have said no. Depends how ill dad was. Does he look after your son when you’re ill?

READ MY MESSAGE!

I read the OP and can clearly see it was unplanned this time. My point is that just because she was stoned during this unplanned occasion and nothing bad happened, don’t let that make the OP think that would be the case every time, so don’t allow that to give get a free pass to do it again when it is her planned time with him.

@albaalba351 and there it is …… Sounds like you could do with a smoke yourself.

Read The Full Original Post

"I'm bonkers aren't I?"

Said by Kool Kraaazy people everywhere!

But in that case it would be YOU the other parent that dropped child off unexpectedly to a stoned parent that had been drinking, so who the unreasonable one?!

This 😊 hope you had a lovely evening.
The hyperbole on this thread is making me chuckle. Tis always the way when weed is mentioned on MN. Slave trade! County lines! Nah, my nans mate grows it, homegrown growing and selling is massive. People like to know where it's from these days. I dont smoke it but am partial to half a gummy every now and again. I don't drink anymore. As far as someone stating that weed is more dangerous than alcohol. No its not. Nowhere near. Even with the damage the lethal strains are causing to the younger generations. Alcohol rots you from the inside, out. It prevents your ability to physically function. It's physically addictive and can kill you if you attempt to go cold turkey OR drink it after detox. I am talking about alcoholics by the way not Mary who enjoys a nightcap every night before bed.

No need to shout love.

Your original post was very unclear if this was what you were trying to say.

This post trying to clarify took a bit of unpicking too, tbh, before I understood what you're trying to say

Absolutely ridiculous. Alcohol is legal and is far more damaging than cannabis (and I say that as someone who loves a glass of wine and a non user of cannabis).

The government should legalise pot. Other places have and it’s been fine.

OP this wasn’t expected and the fact you can post here shows your in control and fine.

Sure but unless he's at death's door, the point at which you realise the other parent is stoned is probably the point you realise you have to parent even though you feel like crap.

It sounds like you've done your best to cope with an unexpected and less-than-ideal situation, your son's safe, nobody's been hurt, so try not to be too hard on yourself.

That said, despite what it's 'cool' to think, there are health risks associated with cannabis, including an increased risk of mental health difficulties and of health problems arising from smoking it. For your own health and wellbeing, depending upon how you see and balance those risks in your own case, you might find it helpful in the longer term to have an alternative go-to for relaxation.

Unless your son's dad was seriously ill, I do think he was unreasonable for putting you and your son in that situation. It sounds like he was happy to dump his child on someone who was under the influence, for his own convenience. And now you're probably going to need to factor in to your own choices that he could pull this again. That's not fair on you.

Oh my gosh I'm in!

I'm in Canada, but the next time I'm in the UK ( if that's where you live) I'm showing up.

I will find us a kitchen to paint. 😉

’Tonight dad is ill and I’ve been handed back my son’

Did you get a choice? Lots of parents have to look after kids when unwell. And how much care was needed if he easily went off to bed?. I would be seriously annoyed if I was given no say in the matter. If you were anxious about it, did you tell the dad that you were ‘absolutely stoned’ before he ‘handed back’ your son?

I think I would have expected the dad to look after his own son for that one night and would be pretty annoyed. Esp if I had concerns about my own capacity to parent due to taking drugs.

No child deserves an upright judgemental Mum who doesn't understand what drug addiction is or calls people druggies, but here we are.

💀

She's either growing it herself or buying it from someone. Most of the current stuff comes from immigrants (currently a lot of Vietnamese in the NW) are here as slaves managing houses for criminal gangs. There is nothing good about drugs. Someone's getting hurt somewhere.

If you don't know what you're smoking you don't know how long it stays in your system. At least with a glass of wine we are all happy to accept that it stays in your system until it's metabolised, and we have an acceptance of that, and indeed if you wanted, you could measure the levels.
However smoking this stuff can impair your mental capacity in an ongoing manner.

So his dad is ill and he got to just hand his son back!! Man, in my next life I wanna be a dad 🤣 if your son was ill in your care, would you send him to his dad or would you just crack on?

I wouldn't worry OP, it sounds like he's safe and you're ok, you didn't intend for this to happen and as soon as you knew it was you stopped, if you'd have carried on drinking and smoking once your son was back, that would be a different story!

Desperate times, desperate measures - you don't exactly skin up every morning before breakfast by the sound of things so don't worry about a one off! Sounds like DC had a nice evening ...