When did 50/50 become so common?

[Luckylooloostar]

I have a SC and when contact was set up over 13 years ago it was really common to do EOW with maybe a night in the week. No mention of 50/50 ever. Really common among others too around that time.

but Iv noticed a trend over the last few years that seems to be when you split its now 50/50…

Do more men now want this so they don’t have to pay CMS?

Maybe they want to see more of their kids?

I think most parents love their chidren and want to share in their life in a meaningful way and have a proper relationship with them. Like mothers , like fathers.

We (rightly) bash absent fathers and complain about what a pittance cms is.

Now we're slagging them off for taking on an equal load and claiming cms is suddenly a big amount worth spending half your time trying avoid?

They can't win, can they?

The three couples I know with 50/50 certainly went for this option because each parent wanted to be equally involved with their DC.
In one case, the Mother was the highest earner by far.
I would like to think that employers are far more flexible with working hours to make childcare more do-able for both parents.

Honestly the people on here. Just for absolute clarity…you’re accusing men of going for 50/50 to avoid paying out more? It’s no wonder MN has such a reputation for being a snake pit.

I think most couples nowadays are full-time & share the parenting more equally, so when they split things remain the same.

Whereas in the past, many women were very part time & the primary carer so they remained so after the split.

I think the courts have had a change of precedent or legislation. I'm not in family law but it's now the starting point for consideration. I do think it's over all a positive, so hard on the NRP if they're a decent and willing parent otherwise.

My husband would have loved the chance to see his child more. Nothing to do with money. A child has two parents. I think it’s great.

Let’s be honest... We all know some men do 50/50 to avoid CMS 😂

Because both parents want to be involved with their children. Seen it alot now.

That was correct in our case. My OH worked full time and his ex didn’t work at all so it defaulted to EOW.

My ex is 100% wanting 50/50 custody to avoid paying maintenance. DD doesn’t want that though. Ex has huge maintenance arrears.

Not in the case of the parents I know...the dads wanted to see their children as much as they could. I think that view might be slightly outdated although I'm sure some think like you suggest

yeah but they still manage to get women to fall for it then

its not just men, I would have loved 50/50 in fact I think it sounds like the best set up. I hate the assumption it’s just men wanting it to avoid maintenance surely it’s harder/ cost more to have your child 50% of the time, does that also mean women don’t want it so they can get maintenance? I wish my ex would have wanted 50/50

Both parents wanted to be involved 10-20 years ago too I’m sure but the default was mostly EOW visitation. No one ever mentioned 50/50.

I think some men do it to avoid paying CM.
Some men want to spend as much time as possible with their DC.

And it's much more common for both parents to work full time and actually then both benefit from shared childcare/custody.

I’m still with the father of my kids but I’d absolutely hate 50/50.

@WandaWonder No - they get the family courts to fall for it.

Family courts do not force women to have children with terrible men, women have to take responsibilty for that

So you'd settle for only having your kids every other weekend then?

I think the default should he what was in place before the split, in terms of time with primary carers...surely that's the least disruptive thing for the kids?

Clearly not but yes I’d expect their dad to have them EOW considering that’s what he has with my SC.

I actually think the new generation of men coming through are much more hands on fathers and used to being with their children more/wanting an active part in their children's upbringing

Any decent parent is going to want as much time as possible with their children. Not sure why we are defaulting to a situation in break ups where the men will bugger off and leave the mother with the kids.

They are equally parents and therefore want equal time

And we know some women will spend the CMS on hair, nails, fake tans or whatever…what’s your point? Doesn’t mean all women will.