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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have left this date.

1000 replies

Needtonamechange9 · 24/02/2024 23:00

So I'm pretty certain I'm in the right.

I've been talking to this guy on the Bumble app for almost 2 months. Finally pinned down a date we could both meet (tonight).

I spent time getting ready and uberring 30 mins to see him and this is what happens. I'm the grey one.

I'm still in shock and on way home. If you read the rest of the messages from before today this guy seemed SO NORMAL!!!! Has a good job, kids.... WTF!!!!

To have left this date.
To have left this date.
To have left this date.
To have left this date.
To have left this date.
OP posts:
EmilyTjP · 24/02/2024 23:03

I think you’ve completely overreacted!

Dacadactyl · 24/02/2024 23:04

I feel like you went from 0-100 with accusations and I'm not sure that him asking you to go to his to meet a friend would necessarily mean he wanted a threesome!!

That being said, someone who was late for a first date wouldn't be for me at all, so on that basis alone YANBU and I'd have blown him off too.

Galeforcewindatmywindow · 24/02/2024 23:04

Imo he was rude being late /changing plans.. But jumping to the threesome scenario was a bit of a leap surely? I would have left also though.

EmilyTjP · 24/02/2024 23:05

What on earth made you think he was arranging a threesome?!

DrunkenElephant · 24/02/2024 23:06

You have MASSIVELY overreacted.

Original poster
Needtonamechange9 · 24/02/2024 23:06

My issue is he said the three of us could ' meet together and have a good night.' What does that mean? Especially if this is a first date between me and him.

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 24/02/2024 23:06

A threesome? Really?

EmilyTjP · 24/02/2024 23:06

Needtonamechange9 · 24/02/2024 23:06

My issue is he said the three of us could ' meet together and have a good night.' What does that mean? Especially if this is a first date between me and him.

A drink?! Why would it mean sex?

Oneofthesurvivors · 24/02/2024 23:06

This reply has been deleted

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Lund · 24/02/2024 23:06

Lucky escape for him I think...

TheShellBeach · 24/02/2024 23:07

Needtonamechange9 · 24/02/2024 23:06

My issue is he said the three of us could ' meet together and have a good night.' What does that mean? Especially if this is a first date between me and him.

Oh I agree he's flaky.

But I'm not sure where you got the threesome from.

SallyWD · 24/02/2024 23:07

Absolutely nothing he said pointed towards a threesome. It's a bit odd that you kept saying that's what he wanted when he said several times it wasn't

ThisHonestQuail · 24/02/2024 23:08

No good will ever come from a date at 10pm on a Saturday night 🤣

trekking1 · 24/02/2024 23:08

Of course you are in the right, the guy is a weirdo. It's wild you even waited for him there for an hour, you should have left after 5 minutes. Also I might be old, but who sets a date at 9:30pm? That's so late, my ass wants to be in bed by 11 😂

beachmum1 · 24/02/2024 23:08

I think you owe him an apology 😅

SussexLass87 · 24/02/2024 23:08

I mean, going to a stranger's house is a huge no no so you're not unreasonable there. Nothing wrong with protecting yourself...but why did you think he wanted a threesome?

Also...changing plans at the last minute and ditching you for a friend was massively off.

Careerdecisions · 24/02/2024 23:11

This is so weird! He sounds like a nice guy who was listening to a friend in need. Rather than cancel the date or let her down he suggested the three of you hang out together. Nice that he thought he could introduce you to his friend so soon. Sorry but you sound like a jealous girlfriend accusing him of wanting to be with his friend instead of you or as well as you.

NotQuiteNorma · 24/02/2024 23:11

Agreed, sounds like he had a lucky escape...

NotStylishOrBeautiful · 24/02/2024 23:12

He was flaky, but you were… WEIRD.

pictoosh · 24/02/2024 23:12

Agree the threesome accusation was...unexpected.
I agree he was disrespectful and flaky. I certainly wouldn't have hung around waiting for him either.
But I don't think he was luring you over for a threesome.

Original poster
Needtonamechange9 · 24/02/2024 23:13

I don't know why I thought threesome. But why would a man think or anyone think its acceptable to meet another friend on a first date if it was a normal first date

OP posts:
LizFromMotherland · 24/02/2024 23:13

Jesus, why did you keep bringing sex into it and threesomes??

He was massively unreasonable and should've told her he had a date.

But it was blatantly obvious he wasn't asking for sex with either of you, let alone both of you!

Mazuslongtoenail · 24/02/2024 23:14

forget the did he want a threesome issue. You arranged to meet for a first date and he’s not there and eventually says come round instead he’s got a mate round.

Errr nope.

CherrySocks · 24/02/2024 23:14

Why has it taken almost 2 months to meet in person? He sounds quite young or naive. It was weird he didn't tell his female friend he had an appointment. You were right not to go to the house of a complete stranger. The female friend might have been a story he made up to get you to go to his house, for all you know.

Collywobblewobbles · 24/02/2024 23:14

Wow poor guy...!

Yes he was flaky and that would be a black mark for a first date but you went down a really random path accusing him of wanting threesomes and seeming to suggest orgies!

You definitely owe him an apology

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