To ask how parents manage after school activities when both work full time?

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Loads of brilliant after school activities near us, from the essential (swimming lessons) to fun extras (theatre, coding).

But, myself and my husband both work full time and currently our primary aged kids are in the mediocre after school club until 5.30pm.

How do similar families manage to get their kids to activities? Is the only answer an after school nanny? It's going to be very expensive for someone to pick them up from school, walk with them 10 min to an activity, wait around and then walk home with them again. Or is there another solution?

I'm seeing most of their friends doing all this great stuff because they have a parent working part time, and I'm feeling bad they are missing out.

Scale back your hours to be around in the late afternoon

Exactly this. If you have space, a live-in au pair would likely be cheaper than breakfast and tea club and allow them to go to activities, but you have another person living with you. We have our DDs sharing and gave up our bedroom with ensuite to accommodate an au pair to provide wraparound care and transport

We manage as I’m a sahm. Other ways inc part time, wfh, occasional lift shares.

Prep schools usually offer the full range of clubs (swim, coding, drama, trampoline, sports, art etc) straight after school which make it easier if that’s an option, but obviously that’s extra ££

I’m a SAHM and I’d be more than happy to pick up someone elses child from school and take them to the same class as my daughter if the parent could collect them after. Might be worth asking in the class what’s app group.

Wfh flexible hours (to a point) and getting friends to take to activities and me picking up (ones that finish after 5.30pm).

Now dc are in secondary, activities are a bit later and often start at 5.45pm or later so it’s easier.

We have the miracle childminder option. She drop DS2 at Beavers and we collect, takes both DSs swimming (again we handover at the pool) and DS2 to cricket. DS1 is now Y6 and Scouts and his cricket both start much later so we can drop him off and collect. Matches we do as needed (often CM drops and we arrive when we can).

I had two parents who worked FT and I’m blooming delighted (and was from a young age) that my DM worked. She’d have been a terrible SAHM (probably chronically depressed like her own DM was!). Love her to bits and am delighted she didn’t sacrifice her career (law partner) at the altar of expectations from other people!

Me and my DH both work full time. Husband drops our son to school and then I pick him up 4 days a week and one day he goes to after school club. I work from home do it helps, I have blocked my calendar for 30mins to do pick ups and make up for the lost hours later during the day. I also drop and pickup from other weekly after school activities like Swimming, judo, football etc. I usually take my laptop when class is an hour long and work while waiting in the wait area.
Fortunately my work is very flexible and all the classes are local to us! The one that is further away is on a weekend and DH takes care of that!
I also walk for all pick ups and drops and count that as an opportunity to do my 10000 steps a day.
I am not sure if you or your partner can work from home few days a week and then manage the classes? Otherwise classes on weekends if that’s not an option!

We just pay for one club a week (swimming) and the school let's us pick two clubs (changes each half term). The wraparound for other days we cover with a childminder, so kid gets downtime playing with his mates. We wfh so do drop off/pick up 2 days a week. We're too tired to do more clubs currently!

We didn't.
H was military so couldn't 'scale back' and I was the higher earner, so we couldn't give up my salary without scuppering ourselves for the long term.
As a result, both my kids were in full time child care 8-6 from when my maternity leave ended. Nothing cruel about it. It was our necessity.

Could you flex your hours? So, one of you works 08:00 - 16.00, and the other 09.00 - 17.00? Would mean one of you leaves early, and the other does the mornings. The one who finishes at 16.00 then does the after school events/clubs.

We did clubs that were later in the evening or at the w/e.

My dc is at a private school with all activities at school. Before that we had an afternoon nanny who did this, when we both worked. You could nanny share if another child you know from school maybe is doing the same activity but that would be difficult to match. Most people I know do it over weekends, but that unfortunately eats up a lot of the weekend.

We haven’t started that yet but I don’t work Monday’s and WFH 2 out of 4 days. DH WFH full time and starts early and finishes at 4 so one of us will always be around just after 4pm to do ferrying about.

Staggered start/finish is the best way.

If they have friends that want to do the same activities, could another parent collect them from school and drop them at the activity, then you do pickup and drop the other child home?

Yes we only manage it from being part time. Is there any chance you could start early and finish early one day? And hubby do the same?

I'd look around for weekend clubs. It's worth checking for Saturday morning swimming lessons and things like Junior Park run which are always on at weekends.

If your children are interested in learning an instrument I think that local guitar/piano teachers would be able to work around your schedule as well.

Don’t they have after school club running at your school setting? My DC’s clubs start straight after school finishes (at the school), then you either collect at 4pm or send them to the school wrapcare?

I have a child competing in a sport at GB standard. No way could she be doing that if she was in school til 5.30 every day.
And I have a child who is on the talent pathway of his sport's national governing body and another who now works professionally in what was her childhood hobby. No way could they be doing that if I hadn't had the income to support them.
I grew up in a home where my Dad had an OK job and Mum was a SAHM. We weren't poor. We owned our own home, were never hungry, dirty or freezing but there was no money for "extras" of any kind. My only hobbies were Brownies/Guides because they were cheap. I longed to go to the clubs and classes that many of the other kids did but never could. I tried some of those things as an adult and in fact found a sport I love and probably could have been quite good at had I started as a child. But my parents could never give me the opportunities to find out. I didn't want my children to have that same experience if I could help it.
Parents who can afford to develop their children's interests, especially to a high level, without 2 wages are very fortunate. We could have paid the household bills on one salary but I doubt that any of my children would have even started their sports and other hobbies and we certainly couldn't have afforded the huge amount of money we have spent on training, kit and travel over the years to allow them to become "decent" at their activities. It's not black and white.

Grandparents is how. My dd goes to rainbows on a Monday evening so my mum picks her up from school, gives her a snack and helps her get change then takes her to the club otherwise she’d only be able to go to clubs of a weekend.

The only way we manage any after school stuff is that a) I work PT and b) there’s clubs straight from school that just require a later pickup so no faffing (these are paid for clubs).

If we both worked FT it would be as other have described, weekends and later in the week although TBH I wouldn’t be up for that if I was working FT.

Please don’t beat yourself up about it. If you both need to work FT then so be it. We are incredibly fortunate in our circumstances.

We prioritised swimming, they each went to drama / dance at various times (Saturday) and signed them up for additional activities in school if they were interested. They didn't go to Brownies etc because we couldn't make it work.

Easier now they are older (high school) because the classes are later.

Two full time working parents here. Both work 7-3 some days to incorporate the school run and activities.

For us, my job is very intense and is all the hours I can possibly give it, and often involves site visits or travel. I'm senior enough to be flexible but not to the extent of committing to a couple of hours during the day, one day a week. My husband is more flexible but it's still a full time job.

I don't want an au pair living with us.

So I guess either we try and match up with other parents or I pay someone expensive to take them. Potentially that's possible if it's something they really want to do (thanks to the above intense job).

Thanks for the comments.

Aside from the mum guilt comments! For what it's worth my mum (and dad) both worked full time. We had an au pair. I don't remember feeling neglected but I do remember absolutely amazing family holidays. We all manage these things differently.

Most clubs are in the evening or at the weekends

I don't know many people where both parents work 40h weeks tbh. Most i know, one parent does 4 days a week and has some degree of flex over hours and so has a couple of school pick ups each week where they can take to swimming etc.