To be disappointed partner booked "holiday" ?

[closemydoormow]

So me and partner have 2 holidays booked this year.
Greece in September and a ski holiday in December.
I'm more than happy with this
He has now told me he has booked us 3 nights in Gran Canaria in 4 weeks
I questioned the 3 nights thing and he said they were really cheap flights (under £20 ) so he thought why not
Aibu to be a bit annoyed
It's a long way to go for 3 nights
We land on the Sunday at 10.30 am
We fly back on the Wednesday at 11.30 am

Would you be annoyed going all that way for 3 nights ?

We have the week off that week as we originally were going to go to Leeds for two nights
He's changed it to this

YABU

you don’t sound particularly compatible

@WonderfulCheese it's Ryanair

Did that's even worse. You had plans and he just decided to change them, with no discussion.

Without asking you, that's just not fair.

What were you going to do in Leeds? Or for the other 5 days?

Why do you need to book a hotel to save a 25 min taxi ride? I'm not saying you shouldn't stay in a hotel btw, I think it would be a nice bonus but wouldn't say you NEED to.

It sounds a bit like a mindset thing here in terms of not wanting to go.
If he's booked a hotel the night before then I'd see it as a 4 night holiday and make even more of it!
Nice meal, back to the hotel for a relaxing, early night (stress free as packing all done and no housework as in hotel room etc). Cooked breakfast once in the airport.....

It actually sounds like bliss to me.
It's the type of thing I'd love me DP to do for me....main reason he can't is that I have dc (he doesn't) and I'd feel guilty leaving them and/or would need to sort childcare

WTF what a weird conclusion to come to. Pre children my husband I used to do this every now and then - book a last min city break or spa weekend etc on a Friday whilst at work. I bet 99% of people would see this as spontaneous fun.

@mouseychick

Wow, You sound fun! We look at it as exciting, you think it's gonna be a regular weekend but end up somewhere else in the world without a care in the world! Life is very much for living and taking opportunities when they come up.. that weekend was Pisa for £150. I'm clearly a terrible wife!!

Is it an environmental concern you have?

Probably not given they are going to Greece in September and skiing in December.

I'd happily do this - even with 2 preteens let alone just me and dh.

@HarrietStyles

WTF what a weird conclusion to come to. Pre children my husband I used to do this every now and then - book a last min city break or spa weekend etc on a Friday whilst at work. I bet 99% of people would see this as spontaneous fun.

It's only spontaneous fun for me if I am asked if I want to do it. Having someone else decide I'm travelling abroad isn't spontaneous. It's disrespectful.

You are the 1% then!

I dont really see your problem, but then again I'm not you. If you've no obligations to sort like pets, children, work etc then fine. If you have and hes just booked it without asking then I'd be annoyed because that sort of stuff usually falls to you.

I think lots of people struggle with January and just want something to look forward to soon-ish.

@HarrietStyles

You are the 1% then!

You made that up though. You have no idea what the actual % is, you can't decide I am the 1% because you are ok with it.

If the airport is only 25 mins away why on earth would you need a hotel? You will only claw back 25 mins so makes no sense at all. A hotel is surely for when the airport is hours away

I was previously in a controlling relationship where my every move was dictated so I have issues with this sort of thing too. I don't like anyone deciding for me what I'm going to be doing, I need to have a discussion about it first.

Sounds great to me!

@mouseychick it's not controlling if her DH likes it (which he presumably does otherwise he'd have said "no")

It sounds like there are 2 camps of people:

1. control freaks who need to have a say in (and plan) everything.
2. those of us who like romantic surprises, a bit of spontaneity and effort from our partners.

Neither is wrong but maybe you're not compatible.

They have a weeks annual leave booked so he knew she was free to go. Ok, they had plans to stay in Leeds for 2 nights but who wouldn't choose 3 nights in Gran Canaria over 2 nights in Leeds, especially in February??!

I think her DP sounds lovely and if OP doesn't appreciate it that's her prerogative.

I'd love it if my partner did this for me!!

Control issues?!

@sandrapinchedmysandwich I would be anxious that the taxi wouldn't turn up at 3am and to pay for parking at airport if we drove would cost more than booking the £50 premier inn at the airport
Plus the taxi would be around £35 so only a extra £15 to stay in hotel

This situation could be

A) wonderful...
Nothing planned in your life at all for the3 days (which I've never personally had in my entire life post about 3yo but whatever, clearly some people don't) and no money and the kind of person who can't organise stuff, so someone is treating you as a surprise.

Or
B) awful
You were looking forward to Leeds plus 5 days r & r/peace. And someone decides on your behalf to use joint money to do something totally different without checking. Controlliny and Bang out of order.

I think that’s fine. I recently went to Tenerife for 3 nights and often go to Dubai to visit my bro for a long weekend and that’s around 7 hours.

id be over the moon if I had a partner who did spontaneous things like this! I think its lovely of him

Hmm ... Leeds or Gran Canaria? Hard to choose, they're both so lovely in the middle of February 😅

Btw, you'll be away on Valentine's day, am I right?
Aww ... 🌞💞

Having the night at a hotel instead of a long trek home will be really nice. It's 5 nights altogether, a proper mini-break, and the leisurely travel's genius!

Wow, how ungrateful can one person be?!

For the avoidance of doubt yes you ABU.

Wowowowwow, gonna take me a while to get over this one.

Ah fair enough then. I think it sounds lovely and this is coming from someone who adores Leeds as a city break. I bet you will have a grand time