To think a 9½ year old should be giving Christmas presents to mum and Dad

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At the very least, choosing something for them and another adult paying.

I was asking a child I know what they got their Mum and Dad for Christmas and he said "Nothing"... I was about surprised that he didn't even go Tina shop with the other parent and choose something he thought they might like.

My lad has always chosen something for his grandparents, cousin and aunty. Ever since he was about 2/3. So we'd go to the sweets section in the supermarket and he'd choose something for each person, we'd make sure he wrapped it up and most importantly was the one to hand the present over. And when he got older around 5-6, he would specifically look for something he thought they would like and I'd pay. And from around 8 he would use some of his own money to pay part of it, then from 11/12 he'd use just his money.

Was I too harsh? Or is it normal that 9year olds don't get presents for people?

Focus on your own children rather than some 9-year-old who didn't act how you think they should've

The only people who appreciate children’s “arty creations” are their parents.

I suppose it depends how much store you set by receiving presents... my adult DDs didn't get me a gift to unwrap for Christmas but we had a wonderful weekend together a few weeks beforehand, which was more precious.

To be honest, there wasn't a single present under our tree that was a surprise to me this year. I wrapped every single one (no matter who it was from/to). And every single one was appreciated. Because DH and I had chosen our own presents and we know DS well enough (i.e. we listen to the heavily dropped hints / internet links) to get it right. And aunts, uncles, grandparents always ask for input.

It saves so much grief.

I haven't RTFT, so apologies if this has been discussed, but I totally disagree with you OP.
Us adults have turned Christmas into a huge consumer fest of stress and expense and obligation.
If each of my children had to buy presents for us thats 6 extra gifts to think of (we have 3 kids), then what if they buy for each other? Thats 6 more gifts, grandparents too maybe? 9 more.
Then there are the Christmas cards they have to write to friends or they feel guilty for not reciprocating, which can take ages to do.

This year my eldest made us a card, and my parents a card. He did it off his own back, no persuasion or convincing and it meant the world to us. But I would never ask him to do it as it loses it's meaning. I would also never expect them to choose a present for me. When they are old enough to either ask us to get something, or buy it themselves without being asked, then that's completely up to them.
I'm not going to add pressure to them (or us).

The magic of Christmas for us is the time we spend with our kids, the reading together, the cosy moments, the board games, the books, the Christmas movies. I appreciate whatever they choose to do but I certainly don't need gifts from them.

I don't think it's a good lesson to take them into a general shop and get them to find a present for someone. It's buying for buyings sake.
Mine have always made us presents. A picture they've worked hard on or homemade vouchers for things like a makeover from them.
I involve them in thinking of good presents for DH and other family members and I know they gave DH some ideas for my presents too.
I'd much prefer that or a handmade gift, than them going into a shop and buying 'something for £10'

We always gave presents to our parents. When we were younger, it was usually ‘suggested’ and paid for by the other parent on our behalf, but we always wrapped it, wrote the label etc. When we were a bit older, teen years onwards I suppose, we chose and paid for a present ourselves.

At this age no mine never did this and we never took them. We are adults and didn’t need an extra present that we are paying for and kids didn’t need pressure of getting a gift. As they got older and had part time jobs they picked up a token gift etc for us . But no right or wrong up to each family how they want to do it

We have never made our children buy or make a gift for either parent. They have helped choose or make gifts for grandparents or other relatives but not us because we weren't that arsed about a gift. Plus it's another gift we would have to have thought of and bought.

It's not turned them into selfish goblins. My teens have bought us lovely and very thoughtful gifts once they had money for themselves, without any prompting from us (was an even better gift because of that)

Edited, this was for Christmas etc not occasions like mothers day as they usually have stuff from school etc

I'm surprised nobody but me has mentioned a school "present room" given I know of two local schools that use this.

I think it depends on the set up tbh. I’m a single parent, my son’s Dad isn’t on the scene and I only have a small family, my Dad isn’t alive and I don’t really have anything to do with his side of the family.

Apart from buying for my mum and her us, my sisters and I don’t routinely buy for each other because two of us are always skint and don’t want the cost or hassle and the other being well off doesn’t really want for anything so we just agree not to do gifts though the eldest usually gives my son a bit of cash in a card (she has no children), on the years she’s been kind enough to host Christmas Dinner for us I’ve always got her a token gift such as a bottle and some chocolates. For this reason there isn’t really much opportunity to teach what you do.

My Mum isn’t easy to buy for, she has everything she wants because if she likes something she just buys it, shes not much of one for drinking and shes diabetic so doesn’t really eat much sweet stuff so the Christmas present to my Mum I tend to buy and do as from us both, for her birthday or mothers day if she happens to see something she likes / wants when out and about and knows its in the remit of what I’d spend she will call me and ask me if I want to transfer her the money for it if she picks it up which is a win win in my book as I don’t have to waste time trudging round shops stressing about what to get and she gets something she genuinely likes / wants. My Mum will often get me a token gift on behalf of DS such as a card and some chocolates or flowers and will drop them at my house whilst I’m at work and will get him to write the card so he can give them to me when I get home so he’s never really had much of an experience of being involved in buying stuff though once when he was about 6 he went to the supermarket with my Mum and he saw they had single rainbow coloured roses (I love them) and he asked his Grandma if he could get me one and insisted on paying for it with his own pocket money! It was super sweet and thoughtful and to this day (hes almost 15) I still tell him that its my most prized gift ever as it was such a kind, thoughtful and unprompted gesture!

DS is a grouchy teen now and this month I gave him a little extra pocket money and told him that he’s at an age now where he should be doing his own Christmas shopping and not expecting Grandma to do it for him and that it would be nice if he could make the effort for her too as she does a lot for us and I told my Mum she didn’t need to get stuff on his behalf this year as I’d told him he needs to do his own shopping. He went to the shops on his way home from school, he picked the gifts and came home and wrapped them. I’m hoping going forward he won’t need prompting!!!

No I don't think it's strictly necessary either. I don't want them spending their bits of pocket money on stuff for me either - they have plenty of time as older teens/adults to go and choose their own gifts. I don't ask mine to get anything for me.

Ours had a stall where you donated tat that you didn't want, then were pressured to send your child with money to buy someone else's unwanted crap. It was awful.

Christmas present giving isn't a big thing in some families.