Does anybody’s husband do any of the work re Christmas and if so what?

[T1cTacT03]

My dh doesn’t like Christmas and says he’d happily not celebrate it. Ok except our kids( late teens)and family like it so we can’t bail out completely as a family. So I do everything.Buy all the presents, wrap everything, write all the cards( he does the post office drop off because he wfh and I don’t). I do all the food planning, shopping and cooking etc. He completely loses it if I get the slightest bit stressed and says he would happily not celebrate and it’s my choice.

So do other husbands do any of it or is it the norm for husbands to do nothing? Wondering if I would get less stressed or does it not make any difference? I have seriously reduced as much as I can. Very frugal with presents and we don’t do a load of social stuff.

Mine does plenty, but he likes Christmas. If any of us would it would probably be a different matter

He buys for his family
I do most of the wrapping
We don't do cards
If we host he does some of the cleaning and some of the cooking and most of the washing up

My husband sorts all the snack food and drinks. Buy the kids presents between us. Breakfast on Xmas day is a two person job. I tend to sort the main meal but he helps as needed, he does a big cooked brunch on Boxing Day,
I do wrap the presents and write the cards though but he puts up all the outside lights and we decorate inside together.
It's a pretty even split these days

Mine always cooks, does the food shop, and has done all the wrapping every year until this one.

Mine does his fair share. We don't do cards, apart from us and ds the only present to buy is for his dad, so it's simple. Dh has a lot more going on in the run up to Christmas with work than I do too and has to sort things for his staff and socialise

I sort all presents for both my family and his.
DH does all food shopping and on Christmas Day he does all the cooking. His roast potatoes are legendary!

I do meal planning for online delivery, and shopping for presents.

He does all the cooking / prep & clearing up.

Basically I do the prep then come Christmas Eve day I put my feet up & do nothing 😃

He buys for his family, except the photo calendar I make for his parents. He will also wrap with me but I can wrap about 3x as fast so frankly it's not a massive contribution 😉

He will sit with me to do the online food order and he goes to collect it. Then he plays fridge tetris for a few days 😁

Mine does the cooking and presents for his closest relatives - mum & sibling.

DH does some. I probably do more, cos I'm more organised and he's quite laid back, but he's very willing to chip in with whatever he's asked to do. I did all the present buying, but he'll wrap half with me. I cook the Christmas dinner (we had 14 of us this year) - but he prepares all the veg the night before, and we sort of share clearing up. He shoved a hoover round and helped me make up beds for visitors. Our kids are also late teens to late 20s.

He generally does more washing up than me, but I'll probably cook more. We do a supermarket shop together.

Your DH sounds manipulative by completely 'losing it' and making threats if you dare show any signs of stress or being tired. Of course you want a decent Christmas with kids. It's really not good enough for him to announce he would happily not celebrate and therefore you can do everything.

He does:
90% of present buying and wrapping
All of the food planning, buying, cooking and storage for the entire period including multiple breakfasts etc
Coordinating present lists with most other family including some of mine
Choosing stocking gifts and

I do:
Little extra stocking bits
One activity (light trail type)
Making Christmas pudding and a traditional Greek biscuit
Cleaning and organising in preparation for guests and afterwards
All kitchen cleaning throughout the period

We both do decorations.

Mine does absolutely nothing, but does like Christmas and is happy to partake in everything I organise.

Yup, DH and I both buy presents for the DD's and each other. (He's actually better at presents than I am for DD2). I do the meal plan, we do the Christmas shopping together. He does the cooking, and possibly the baking, or I do the baking. We do the tree together with the girls, the picking, and the decorating. We do the wrapping together, as well, although if he's prepping food, I will go do the wrapping.

Mine does meal planning and cooks. We both plan and buy presents for kids. I do my family and he does his. We wrap presents together. We had a party and bought planned and bought stuff for it, both cleaned house (he hoovers, I do bathrooms for instance). So he does loads and neither of us find it massively stressful because we share it.

DH does cards, stockings for the DC, elaborate letter from Father Christmas to go alongside stocking, present buying and wrapping for his family, Christmas tree (we all decorate but he organises purchase, delivery and disposal). He also does all "festive experiences" like skating, Christmas film at the cinema, organising our Christmas drinks party for friends.

I do all travel organising and logistics with both families, all the cooking, all present buying and wrapping for my family and the DCs, as well as organising any end of year stuff at school eg getting. Christmas jumper, teacher gifts.

I would say that is pretty much 50/50 for time and effort. DH is very involved compared to friends DHs though. Helps that he is a teacher and usually has been off for a while before Christmas Day whereas I am not and have to work.

Basically if he suddenly wasn't around I my children and guests would have an absolutely shit Christmas unless I really worked hard at a lot of things that do not come naturally to me and I have little experience in.

Dh got all the presents for his family and some for mine, got most of the kids presents, did more wrapping than me, did Christmas cards while I did none, got all the stocking fillers, did all the cleaning housework on Christmas eve, cooked and carved the turkey, did lots of washing up.

Mine isn’t a Christmas person at all, but does his fair share.

We're about 50/50. He sorts cards/presents for his side of the family, I do the same for mine, we both discussed and bought presents for DS, he cooked and I cleaned after etc.

I bet he happily tucked into the Christmas dinner and accepted gifts. How selfish.

Partner and I have been together 2 years, but 3 Christmas times. He does Santa for his kids, presents for his family and token gifts for mine. He wraps them all as well. Does any cards for his side. Although we normally do the Santa shop together. He has 2 kids so this year we took a list each and went around Smyths picking it up and a couple of cheaper things that didn't make the final lists but that the kids liked.

I do all my side plus buy for his kids and wrap it all.

This year he wanted to cook Christmas dinner and have it just the 4 of us in the house. No extended family. Kids and I gave ideas for the meal. I bought the roast (3bird from Lidl) and the pigs in blankets. Then the 2 of us went to Tesco together and using our vouchers from Clubcard bought the food and drinks. On Christmas day he did all the cooking and washing up.

Next year we won't have the kids for the meal so will probably go out with my family, depending on what I am working. We are also going to change things for my side of the family and he will give me money towards the presents.

This suits us. I like present shopping, but get fed up wrapping.

Dont think there is a right or wrong way, just the best way to suit your set up

My dh did everything this yeah as I was quite ill and unable to do any. Usually he buys 50% of presents, we share wrapping, he also gets bits and bobs to eat. We very much share the work.

Mine does all food/drink planning, ordering, prep and cooking. About 30% kids gifts, all his own family gifts.

I totally see how stressful the food bit and am delighted it's not me doing it.

Same here. He does presents for his family, I do mine (and he does some of mine as he like doing them). He does children’s presents (again, he loves it). We both decorate. I cook as I love it, he does all the washing up and cleaning. We both do the shopping.

Mine buys presents for his parents and a couple of friends, and me of course. He buys lots of sweet and savoury snacks plus the cheese (he over caters on the cheese every year). Will buy other bits we need too. He gets the decorations down from the loft and puts the tree up plus puts up various decorations and lights. I buy and wrap the kids presents plus buy main meal stuff. I do more ‘mental load’ but he does his share. I wouldn’t be with someone who didn’t.

I have long covid, so dh has to do a lot round the house. He put up and decorated the tree, helped me to bake and decorate the cake (he fetched all the things I needed, so I could sit at the table and do what I could manage), then he helped me with all the pre-Christmas food prep - making stock, stuffing, red cabbage, glazed gammon, gravy, stuffing the goose, peeling everything - more of me at the kitchen table and him fetching and carrying - then he did all the cooking in Christmas Day, and then he and ds3 washed up (because the dishwasher died on Christmas Eve.