Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People make an unnecessary fuss about Christmas

203 replies

mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:05

Or maybe I'm not doing it right/doing enough?

I love Christmas and family traditions etc. But I can't quite understand the weeks of 'Are you all set?' and the general angst. Santa presents were organised here in November, decorations went up two weeks ago, ham and turkey ordered weeks ago. Chocs, biscuits, drinks added into weekly shop over the last few weeks. So now it's a case of getting in the fresh stuff and doing a regular weekend house clean. Granted, it's just immediate family here but even so, do people overdo the craziness/overwhelm maybe? I'm not sure what I'm missing. I'm going out for lunch with friends today and others have commented that they can't believe I have the time to do that this weekend. I did spend an hour in town yesterday getting the stocking bits - books, chocolate coins, trinkets etc. In and out with list. Done.

OP posts:
ssd · 23/12/2023 12:06

I think the same but i fear we are in the minority

listlovers · 23/12/2023 12:08

Bit of a humble brag this, OP.

WillowCraft · 23/12/2023 12:08

Probably if it's not just immediate family it's a lot more work. Also the buying and wrapping is extra work. You obviously have plenty of spare time and mental energy which not everyone does.

But also people like making a fuss about things like this

MacLaine · 23/12/2023 12:09

I think some people enjoy being The Busiest, or The Most Stressed.

bastin · 23/12/2023 12:10

By the time the day arrives I'm so tired of it. The tat has been for sale in shops since August

Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:10

listlovers · 23/12/2023 12:08

Bit of a humble brag this, OP.

Really not meant to be. I actually wonder if I'm just quite unfeeling about it and see it as a set of separate jobs that bit by bit aren't a big deal? I do wonder if I'm not doing 'special right. I just want to stay in my dressing gown after a hard and tiring year and I wonder if there's something I'm missing.

OP posts:
girlyjim · 23/12/2023 12:10

Well, people are different so obviously not everyone is as organized as you. It's not that hard to work out.

Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:11

WillowCraft · 23/12/2023 12:08

Probably if it's not just immediate family it's a lot more work. Also the buying and wrapping is extra work. You obviously have plenty of spare time and mental energy which not everyone does.

But also people like making a fuss about things like this

I am deplete of all mental energy tbh and work ft. So no. I was the same about wedding planning. Booked the various things, bought dress etc. Don't get all the 'stress' people talk about.

OP posts:
Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 23/12/2023 12:12

I think it depends on if you have children and how old they are and how many people you buy for.
If you're hosting or if you're a visitor etc
Its all a factor in how much you need to do, organise, buy etc.

TheNameIsDickDarlington · 23/12/2023 12:14

If you've got the time and money to be prepared that's fantastic for you. The stress for me has come from having to wait for payday/search for the best deals/finding the time to do it all.

Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:14

girlyjim · 23/12/2023 12:10

Well, people are different so obviously not everyone is as organized as you. It's not that hard to work out.

Maybe. But the people I'm referring to have been talking about all they have to do and have been doing for weeks iyswim. My own DM wasn't well from when I was quite young so I feel im replicating a lack of constant work around it and do wonder if I'm not doing enough to make it special.

OP posts:
shellyleppard · 23/12/2023 12:14

Agree, extra guests make extra work. Its lovely to see them but I'm glad when they go 🤔🙃

Daisies12 · 23/12/2023 12:16

YANBU and you are very sensible. I don’t get the “madness” everyone speaks about around Christmas. It’s a very quiet time for us. We keep it very simple and easy.

Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:16

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 23/12/2023 12:12

I think it depends on if you have children and how old they are and how many people you buy for.
If you're hosting or if you're a visitor etc
Its all a factor in how much you need to do, organise, buy etc.

Two primary aged DC. Absolutely, I've said that re people who are hosting 8/10 people etc, that is very different. Unfortunately two of the people we usually host are no longer here but I've always felt like this anyway. Though never hosted more than 3 extra.

OP posts:
Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:17

MacLaine · 23/12/2023 12:09

I think some people enjoy being The Busiest, or The Most Stressed.

Possibly!!

OP posts:
Laiste · 23/12/2023 12:17

I would have agreed with you and said i've been all set for ages - but yesterday i realised i've forgotten to buy xmas crackers! I've never done that before.

So i'm NOT all set and now i'm making a fuss about getting some 😂

HippeePrincess · 23/12/2023 12:18

Some of us don’t have the space to store things for months on end or the money to buy it.
We didn’t have the money to add extra things to the shop in the run up, we’ve spent the whole of December running down the random things in cupboards and freezer so we have space, but also so we aren’t spending money so we can buy nice things for the Christmas week. I was also waiting for the shopping vouchers sent from the school in the last week of term, and Christmas money from my dad which I then use to buy any extras and my DP’s present. Also my first pay since September arrived in my bank yesterday so I’m not ashamed to say I have deliveries today and tomorrow from Amazon.

Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:18

Daisies12 · 23/12/2023 12:16

YANBU and you are very sensible. I don’t get the “madness” everyone speaks about around Christmas. It’s a very quiet time for us. We keep it very simple and easy.

'Full blown mentally friend described things as during the week. She works week on week off and will be hosting her parents for a few hours only.

OP posts:
ThreeTreeHill · 23/12/2023 12:18

I'm finding this year people have been asking me if I'm ready for Xmas about mid Novemeber time, and have been in shock that I wasn't ready early December

Im not really sure what I'm supposed to be ready for. It's only a few presents to buy and a turkey to order really. The decorations take an hour or two. I'll do a big shop for food and thats it. I've been buying a few xmassy bits with my regular food shop so it's really Just a few things I need to buy today/tomorrow

girlyjim · 23/12/2023 12:18

I guess everyone has different ideas of how much they need to do to make it special for them/their family. Some people do just like talking about how much they've done or to do as well, like a badge of honour. Don't compare yourself to others, I'm sure you've done more than enough.

listlovers · 23/12/2023 12:19

mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:10

Really not meant to be. I actually wonder if I'm just quite unfeeling about it and see it as a set of separate jobs that bit by bit aren't a big deal? I do wonder if I'm not doing 'special right. I just want to stay in my dressing gown after a hard and tiring year and I wonder if there's something I'm missing.

Show quote history

You don’t need to struggle for it to be special. It sounds like you’ve nailed it. Relax and enjoy!

Original poster
mikado1 · 23/12/2023 12:20

TheNameIsDickDarlington · 23/12/2023 12:14

If you've got the time and money to be prepared that's fantastic for you. The stress for me has come from having to wait for payday/search for the best deals/finding the time to do it all.

That makes sense for sure. That's not the case for the constant 'Are you all set?' people I know tho.

No need to be ashamed about deliveries today either, pp.

OP posts:
Tinkerbyebye · 23/12/2023 12:22

You sound a bit goady

lots of people are just not organised, or may have to wait a Christmas bonus to pay for stuff, or may get caught up in family stuff so plans go awry.

does it matter? it’s not affecting you

mollyfolk · 23/12/2023 12:23

You sound organised. I am not this year - I did Santa but nothing else. December has been a whirlwind of adult Christmas parties, kids parties and shows and now every weekend has slipped away on me so I was beating through the crowds this morning to get pressies.

PurpleWhirple · 23/12/2023 12:23

Granted, it's just immediate family here but even so, do people overdo the craziness/overwhelm maybe

I'm with you OP but having people over to stay does make a massive difference. We normally have PILs to stay for almost a week and I was just saying this morning how lovely and relaxed I feel about Christmas this year knowing it's just us and we're not hosting anyone. The pressure is normally feel is just not here at all and I'm not tense in anticipation of a week with my horrible MIL

The kids being older makes it a lot easier and less fraught too.

Swipe left for the next trending thread