Everyone got a secret santa apart from me

[nic1079]

So we did a secret santa at work between 10 of us and everybody got their presents yesterday except me.
I've let the organiser know and a message has been put on the group so everyone can see stating that one person is missing their present and for whoever hasn't brought it to bring it in Monday. I am not happy! The person who got me has clearly taken their present with no after thought to the person who they were supposed to buy for and no mention to the organiser that they'd forgotten it etc.
What would you do if the present doesn't appear Monday? I've got a good mind to start the spanish inquisition.

I enjoy SS not because of the gifts I get (some have been fab, some meh) but because it is fun to give. I enjoy picking up something small for someone I wouldn't usually buy for.

I hope the CF brings your secret Santa gift in today OP!

Haha yes, we're all rooting for you to get your candle / smellies today OP!

I refuse to take part in secret santas. Was left out of friends gathering SS one year, then dd was left out the following year.

Now i just ignore it.

Thank you. Im pretty sure i know who it is. (And no i havent gone digging before i get accused of that) I'm not sure if she's even in today now as I've been asked to cover her class 🤔

I'd question if something went wrong with the draw and you've been missed so noone got your name. Also if someone forgot etc then they can't tell you without outing themselves as your santa. I do think you're being a little childish about it commenting the way you have when you don't know the circumstances.

I'm not even going to ask today, just smile and wave boys smile and wave!

Yes

It's awful when you spend the correct amount and put care into the gift and someone else is really stingy.

I think at least I've done the right thing

Hope OPs gift gets sorted

I think SS is wrong on so many levels. It can lead to this sort of embarrassment and upset for a start and it also contributes to landfill. It can put people who need every penny for Christmas under pressure to spend time looking for and spending money on a piece of tat for someone they barely know (and possibly don't even like) - all in the name of forced, corporate jollity. In my experience more people would rather not bother than look forward to them. I mean, what's the point?

It is usually a choice. You don’t have to take part

I wondered that.

Sometimes there is a place for passive-aggression.

(Plus - what's more passive-aggressive than not getting someone a gift in a SS draw because you "don't like them" (as happened to one PP? If you really dislike someone so much you ca't even bring yourself to buy them some bath foam, then ask if someone else will swap with you - say you have no idea what to get them/ can't get to the shops/ etc)

Well, quite.

I remember getting a box of Ferrero Rocher one year.

The person concerned "outed" himself as my Secret Santa by saying, "Sorry it's not very exciting, I don't know you at all so I had no idea what you might like."

Fair enough.

Even if you don't like someone or don't know them from Adam you can buy a cheap box of chocolates so they at least have something to open. Getting a box of chocolates you then regift because you don't like chocolate is way better than the humiliation of not getting anything at all.

People who are unwilling to do even this for the person they like least in the team should not take part.

Did the present materialise?

Come on! I’m on tenter hooks here!!!!!

Nope. Another group message went out from organiser who now knows who it is.

I would do nothing.

If the app was Elfster then the organiser can choose to look.

An uneven number of names wouldnt make someone miss out. 27 people, 27 gifts etc. Just means someone didnt bother again.

The next year we fixed it and so he’d get the boss (her decision) as she earned the most and said she wasn’t worried about not getting one.

He still ‘forgot’.

Some people are just selfish and it’s not just about the present, it’s about how someone is happy to take but not care enough to give

Please don’t tell me people were continuing to buy him Santa gifts even though he refused to contribute. Just ban him from the Santa next year.

We picked a nice thoughtful gift
I wouldn’t expect a thoughtful gift from a Secret Santa tbh.

It’s not always presented as a choice.

Cheeky so and so, whoever it is. Nice of the organiser to do a group message rather than directly confront the person, but at this point, they should be confronted.

Maybe they couldn’t afford to participate?

The op said it was optional. They should not have agreed to participate in that case.

From ss I've participated in before, the amount is usually nominal around £10 or so.

I'm sorry op. It's awful when that happens. Happened to my dh before. It's not about the gift, it's about being the only one excluded 😞

Then they shouldn't take part in the first place