To think preferences should be taken into account?

[SuiGeneris]

So: we are spending Christmas with MIL, as every year. Every year she orders a turkey etc and everyone is expected to have some of that and the vegetables. The children and I don't like turkey, so we mostly eat vegetables and just have the smallest decent slice of turkey possible, for appearances' sake.

Yet I do find it odd that no attempt is made to try other things we might dislike less. After all, judging from supermarkets, there are plenty of alternatives people consider and it is well-known none of us like eating meat. We are not vegetarian but just don't like it that much. DH takes the view the kids need to be exposed to Christmas traditions and I am a grown up so can work around the turkey.

Is turkey really such a big deal for Brits? Surely if it isn't a treat it would be better not to have the kids associate Christmas with a meal they have to endure?

Or AIBU and we should just put up with it, after all it is only one day?

I never understand the obsession with having turkey at christmas because compared to every other meat you'd have on a roast, its crap.

YABU.

Take your own alternative if it means that’s much to you, or host Christmas dinner and do it your way.

We, like lots of others I’d imagine, do a selection of meats at Christmas eg Turkey, gammon, beef and a side of salmon.
maybe you could roast a different meat and take it to your MIL or maybe you could make a veggie alternative if your family don’t like eating meat

Host yourselves and cook what you want! Have you told her you don’t like turkey at all and asked if you can provide a different meat?

It's one meal a year. Why not invite MIL to yours for Christmas, then you can cook something you all enjoy?

I don't eat poultry so I have roast beef. Why not take your own choice of meat? Precooked so it only needs a reheat.

I think if you want something different from the full roast Turkey and sides your MIL is buying and cooking all by herself, then you need to bring it with you to add to the meal. I think it would be rude to expect your MIL to cook many different Christmas meals. She’s cooking the traditional one. Just ring her up and tell her you’d like to bring over a few extra bits and bobs.

Either host yourself and cook what you want.

Or go to MILs and have a small helping of turkey. Even if it's not your preferred choice it's not the most offensive of meats and there's usually plenty of other things to fill your plate with.

Or declare yourself vegetarian, bring your own nut roast or similar and then declare in the New Year that you've changed your mind.

I’ve never liked Turkey, I’d have a minuscule slice because it’s Christmas. I’d never expect someone to cook something completely different in addition to the usual Turkey though just because I don’t like it. In fact we’re hosting this year and we will still be having Turkey!

Cook something else and take it with you.

the person who cooks and pays - chooses.

I'm vegetarian am eat everything except the meat. We have swede & carrot mash, leeks, parsnips, potatoes etc
DS only likes chicken so we cook one every year. Also cook pork with crispy crackling.
If anyone wants to bring something feel free

Well she’s cooking so she chooses

But if you say you’d like to bring beef I doubt she’ll mind

Or, you know, you could.. host?!?!

Can’t you do a second meat under the guise of lots for snacking on another time

Surely the whole point of the Christmas meal is the side dishes anyway? A nice piece of meat would just take up space that is needed for roast potatoes and pigs in blankets plus the Christmas chocolates

It’s the traditional British Christmas meal. If you don’t actively hate it (and TBH, it doesn’t really taste of anything), I’d just put up with it for the one day out of politeness and as an exercise in cultural respect (just as you would if you were invited to the home of anyone else from a culture different from your own), and then stock up on lots of things you like better at home to compensate.

Or really shake things up and invite them to yours.

We don't like turkey so have something else. This year beef and duck.

But it sounds from the OP, and I can hardly bring myself to say that, there might be no pigs in blankets... The HORROR.

We always have goose or duck or beef because no one likes turkey. But if we have guests I cook a turkey (and something we like). It's just nice to please your guests.

It’s the traditional British Christmas meal.

It isn't though. Surely goose is. Turkey is native to North America.

Is there only turkey and veg? No stuffing, pigs in blankets, or other sides? If it is only turkey and veg, I’d be offering to bring additional food as that’s not so much a Christmas feast as a particularly unimaginative Sunday roast.

Turkey is a relatively recent import for Christmas Dinner. Goose, Beef, all sorts have been more fashionable in the past.

Either host yourselves, or take an alternative dish of your choice - easier to warm up a veggie Wellington than cook a ham at someone else's house, for example.

YABU - it’s a classic

Yes turkey is the traditional Christmas meal. If you and the kids would rather something else, why not bring it. Just say you don't eat meat anymore.

Of course it's traditional!! Turkey has been in the UK since the 1500s and it has been pretty common for Christmas since, iirc, Victorian times.

There are plenty of other traditions that haven't been around as long as that.

Me neither! It’s dry and really mediocre. I don’t know anyone who eats turkey on any other day of the year either so it can’t be that delicious as otherwise why doesn’t anyone eat it at other times?! It’s so silly 🙃

Don’t be silly. It’s been traditional in Britain for a long time.