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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel like this about ex's lottery win?

220 replies

SpeedbirdSquawker · 19/11/2023 12:26

My ex has always been lucky with wins on the lottery. A few hundred here, a thousand there.

I have been blocked for a long time but a few days back he unblocked me, we've exchanged pleasantries and he told me he's won the lottery. We're talking a life changing amount here. He can give up work and live off this money with lots to spare for a very luxury lifestyle. I have asked why he unblocked me to get back in contact and he avoids the question entirely. The thing is, I feel utterly bitter about his win. The things I could only dream about with that amount!

AIBU to feel this way and how do I get over it?

OP posts:
LoopyLooooo · 19/11/2023 13:05

YourNameGoesHere · 19/11/2023 12:59

Well yes it's obviously gambling but I thought it was clear I meant like in a casino or something. Statically he's very very unlikely to have won such high amounts on the lottery multiple times no matter how many tickets he's brought but gambling in the casino etc would be more realistic in getting a higher return.

Show quote history

A few hundred there, a thousand there is nothing if you're a very regular player, besides the OP said she was with him then and he definitely did.

wesurecouldstandgladioli · 19/11/2023 13:06

How much has he won?

He’s probably exaggerated it.

Block him.

DanTV · 19/11/2023 13:06

If you had not heard his news, you would be none the wiser and would be spending your Sunday as normal. His news doesn’t change your reality at all. Don’t give him the satisfaction of you dwelling on it.

Takethehintandfuckoff · 19/11/2023 13:07

That’s why he’s made a special effort to tell you, because he knows how you’ll feel about it. Money doesn’t stop somebody being a cunt though, and it doesn’t stop other people noticing that they’re a cunt.

Milkybarsareonmeeeee · 19/11/2023 13:07

SpeedbirdSquawker · 19/11/2023 12:34

I'm not doing bad for myself. I have a well paid job but it's soooo stressful and tiring. I have longed for a simple life living off the land over in Spain for a long time now and that money would allow me to do that (visa permitting of course!) I'm more than a bit bitter!

I will block him.

That money would allow you ?
Its not your money we could all say this about money .

True story I was asked by my ex to emigrate to my exes Home country years back and eventually said no .

two years back when I herd my parents cancer treatment hadn’t worked I herd he had won 50 million in the lottery .
I just laughed as this outcome could only happen to me .

I still wouldn't want to be with him . Money or no money and I’m not exactly flush.
You need to make plans to change the things that are making you u happy with you lot in life .

Takethehintandfuckoff · 19/11/2023 13:09

OP, your correct response should be ‘that’s nice dear.’

FedUpMumof10YO · 19/11/2023 13:09

Has he? Have you seen proof? I'm calling BS

twoshedsjackson · 19/11/2023 13:09

Just console yourself that, if you were still together, he would have the power to use that large sum of money as a way to control you - and relish making you squirm.
What money you currently have, is yours to spend as you like (however much you would like to have more of it-wouldn't we all?) @CrabbiesGingerBeer 's suggestion of a cheery congratulatory message would probably annoy him greatly; he wanted to rub your nose in it, and he gets "Am I bovvered?"
But of course you're annoyed, and it does seem unfair.

ThinWomansBrain · 19/11/2023 13:10

don't really understand why you're obsessing on the "if it was mine" rather than a lottery win by any other random stranger.
You broke up with him five years ago - forget about him, move on and and get a life.

wesurecouldstandgladioli · 19/11/2023 13:11

ThinWomansBrain · 19/11/2023 13:10

don't really understand why you're obsessing on the "if it was mine" rather than a lottery win by any other random stranger.
You broke up with him five years ago - forget about him, move on and and get a life.

I think it’s human nature to sometimes begrudge someone a lottery win if they haven’t been good to you.

Topsyturvy78 · 19/11/2023 13:12

Some people have all the luck. I always get my hopes up when there's an email off the lottery. Just to tell me my block tickets have run out of I've won a lucky dip.🤣🤣🤣Why bother contacting you though unless he's going to offer to pay off your mortgage? I would block him and have done with it.

HarrietStyles · 19/11/2023 13:13

Maybe he has won the lottery, maybe he’s just made it up ……….. either way the only reason he has unblocked you and messaged you about it is because he wants to make you jealous and also piss you off. He wants a reaction, so don’t give it to him. Either ignore the message completely or reply back a simple “Congratulations”.

Hotchocolatemousse · 19/11/2023 13:13

I'd text good luck batting away the gold digger 20 somethings and fairweather friends and block him. Make him a bit paranoid about his win and enjoy your life.

Davros · 19/11/2023 13:14

He must be very lucky or lying. I've won a few times and the highest so far is £3.71!

myotherkidisacassowary · 19/11/2023 13:15

Block him, he’s a mean twat who just wants to run his good fortune in your face. Block him, delete his number and consider yourself fortunate that he’s an ex.

AyrshireTryer · 19/11/2023 13:15

He's your ex for a reason.
He unblocked you to rub your nose into some sort of "if you stayed with me look what you would have had,"
If he wasn't controlling before he clearly is now.
Wish him huge congratulations, block him and enjoy your fabulous life.

Slothsandspiderman · 19/11/2023 13:16

Honestly OP ignore him. My best friend’s ex has a relationship with a multi millionaire and it’s completely ruined him. He’s turned into a grade a twat. His kid, whilst initially impressed quickly realised how it had impacted on him. They are now non contact. He’s miserable, fat and friendless. Revenge is a dish best served cold

Originalmovie · 19/11/2023 13:17

Is he your ex BF or ex husband? If it is the latter and you did not get a full and final financial settlement, i think you might be entitled to some of the win… which would be a lovely own goal he scored ;-)

NoTouch · 19/11/2023 13:18

Reply - congrats, but seriously confused why you unblocked me to tell me? If it was my win you would be the last person I would think of telling 🤣 Hope the money lets you finally move on from us.

Then block him and try to think of him winning as no different from all the other people who win every week.

Mycatmax · 19/11/2023 13:19

I had similar. XP called me out of the blue to tell me he had a windfall of £400k.

It probably was true in his case, but he was definitely doing it to get back at me because I had dumped him. Or maybe he thought it would tempt me back? That’s a horrible idea.

Block, and live your own best life.

XiCi · 19/11/2023 13:20

Having his millions is not going to make you instantly happy. Being bitter and envious is definitely not going to make you happy. If you want to do something with your life then work towards doing it. I have a close friend that lives very simply in rural Spain as you profess to want to do. He didn't need an ex's millions to do it! In fact he did it on very modest savings.

You are blaming your Ex for not having the money to live as you want. It's not your money and not your Exs responsibility. Obviously he knows that him having this money is going to royally piss you off though which us why he unblocked you. Wish him well, and mean it, and move on. You'll feel better for it.

AtomicPumpkin · 19/11/2023 13:21

SpeedbirdSquawker · 19/11/2023 12:44

I do think that given his enjoyment of eating and drinking with his friends, that he'll squander it on drinking on seaside trips.

That money would massively change my life. It's so unfair that he's got it and not me. I dream of a life away from here!

Well, the lottery isn't supposed to be 'fair' is it?

Whinge · 19/11/2023 13:23

I'm curious about how much he claims to have won. As your OP made it sound like he's won several million, He can give up work and live off this money with lots to spare for a very luxury lifestyle.

But then this post makes it sound like a 100k at most. Grin I do think that given his enjoyment of eating and drinking with his friends, that he'll squander it on drinking on seaside trips.

RosaGallica · 19/11/2023 13:23

Wins on the lottery are unfair, they haven’t been worked for. That’s what the word ‘lottery’ means. There’s no reason why it should eat you up any more than if any other random stranger had won. Block and move on.

MsCactus · 19/11/2023 13:24

I don't think he's telling the truth. If so, why would the first thing you'd do is unblock an ex to tell them? Why wouldn't you go off and enjoy your millions?

I think he's just trying to get to you - and apparently it's worked!

Statistically you're also more likely to be randomly murdered on the way to buy a lottery ticket than win the lottery - the chances are so small. Maybe he has won - but it's far more likely that he's trying to wind you up.