My partner is abusive. I don't know how to get out

[Everythingwillbeokeventually44]

Met him in January, he seemed lovely. Prior to meeting him I'd left an abusive marriage. I was rock bottom and trying so hard to rebuild myself and my life.

Started dating this guy in June, he wanted more than I did, I tried to end it and he said he'd kill himself if I ended it. Stupidly I panicked and went to him.

Between now and then when I've stayed at his and he's turned nasty I've wanted to leave he's literally blocked my way. Another time he told me to get the fuck out, he was throwing my belongings down the stairs when I tried to get them and go he grabbed a knife and slit his wrist, he took my phone so I couldn't call for help and basically forced me to watch him bleed until he passed out.

He's slashed all 4 tyres on my car before and kicked off my wing mirrors. He's driven at me in his car whilst I've been in my car.

He's bit my face leaving scars. It was a deep vicious bite. He has kicked me off my feet jarring my back and fracturing my elbow.

He manipulates everything always making himself out to be the victim and he truly believes he is. I'm not allowed to defend myself in anyway or answer back when he's ranting at me.

He's threatened to harm my family and said he'd pay someone to leave me in a wheelchair eating through a straw.

I was absolutely broken when I met him, I'm beyond that now. I feel so suicidal. I just can't find a way out. I am genuinely terrified of the bloke and what he is capable of.

He has been drinking tonight (I don't drink) he's again gone off on one, he's the victim and he's now said he's going to the train station to end his life.

I have never felt so low in all my life. I met me ex at 19 there was an age gap, over the years he hit me and left me unable to look at myself in the mirror because of cruel remarks being called all the names under the sun, I literally hated the sight of myself. I honestly thought I'd met a good one and wanted to take it slow which we were and I managed to open up to him, he helped me with my insecurities, I genuinely thought he cared and loved me.

I'm to scared to go to the police because I have no proof and I genuinely think he'll kill me if I do. I'm scared for my life.

Due to withdrawing I started missing work, making mistakes so to top it off I've also lost my job.

I just can't take anymore. I am so weak I've got no fight left in me.

He's also held a knife to his throat, he's sent me pictures of the train tracks. It's mental torture.

Where is he right now? And where are you?

Are you alone right now?

Do you have your own home? Are you safe at the moment? You really do need to speak to the Police if only for advice and confidence, do you have family who can help.

If he kills himself that’s on him not you.

Go to the police, they can help.

Do you have family or friends? Go, just leave your stuff it can be replaced, just walk out now.

Please contact Women’s Aid urgently or the police if WA are not 24 hour, you are in a crisis situation and need urgent support, let him do whatever he will do to himself, if he ends his life that’s not on you, it’s his decision, you need immediate protection, please act before it’s too late

I am alone at the moment, again he's gone off to the train tracks.

I do have my own home which is extremely rural, it was supposed to be my safe place, my sanctuary in the middle of nowhere. Now I'm too scared to go there because there's no phone signal at all and he's driven there on a number of occasions when I've left.

I have nowhere else to go

Please please contact the Police, also Women's Aid. You are not the only woman to find herself in this situation. You need help to remove yourself from this man who is abusing you so badly. You will be believed, this man has bullied you so that you think no one will listen to you, but there absolutely is help out there for you. I know taking the first step seems too difficult, but please make every effort to do so. Sending love and support x

Go to a friends for family member - you need to get out.

I think this man is dangerous and you need help.

Is there anyway you can even sleep in your car for tonight?

Do not follow him to the train station. If he kills himself that's on him.

Please go to a family member's/friend's house now. Preferably one that he doesn't have the address of. Call the police and tell them everything.
Contact women's aid and ask to be put in a refuge.

Your first priority should be getting yourself safe and hidden from him.

It's very common for dv abusers to threaten suicide. It's a mind games and a way of controlling you .

As others have said, you absolutely must contact police and or womens aid. Let them know the situation and LEAVE and don't look back. Make sure you are in a safe place ,where he can't bother you for now and take a very serious stance on this. If all you have said is true then this will never change as it is clear to me he has some very serious issues and you are potentially at risk. No man is worth this and you need to act to protect yourself from further abuse. You have clearly identified this behaviour as abusive so now believe it and do everything you can to put an end to it, starting right now.

He's not around so pack a bag and leave.

He's not gone to the train tracks as he's too full of himself. Call the police and they will be able to help you.

Do it now while he's gone.

You will be looked after.

Sending hugs and support. Ask to speak with a DVU officer.

Echoing previous posts. The best thing you can do is to leave as soon as possible. Stay with family / friends while you report everything to the police.

Are you in his house? Leave and park up somewhere, ideally you’ll go to the Police now (as in immediately) , or a friend/family.

Turn your phone off. Take his control away.

Do you have a car? If you haven’t had any alcohol in past few hours please just drive - go to friends/family/hotel, just get away, he’s not safe and neither are you

If you do not leave now he will kill you. Pack your things and go to a family member right this second. Call the police from there.

Please please please get out now. Pack a bag and go. Call a friend, a relative, a taxi and just go. If your friends or family aren't local, get the bus or a train. Or go to the nearest police station and tell them what you've told us. They'll help you find a place to stay at least for tonight.

Take what is necessary. Clothing, meds, bank cards, money. If you have to leave things behind so be it.

And try to get a landline put into your home.

Please get out. Go to police. What age is he? There's a chance he's done this before and they know about it. I know you say it's not safe, but they can put things in place to make you feel safe such as if you phone police they will know the situation and it's an emergency and come much faster. Can a family member stay with you for a bit, or you stay there? He is unhinged you need to get out 🙏🏻

You need to leave right now. Pack up a bag and go! Preferably to the police station but I understand if that's too big of a step for tonight. Friends, family, a hotel, just get out! You need to take your chance now.

The police will 100% take you seriously. There will be cctv footage at the train station showing how much of a maniac he is. The police will protect you, I promise.

Please, I'm begging, get up and go now!!

I have personal experience of this sort of manipulative behaviour, threatening suicide, getting his family to call me, me getting police and even once a police helicopter and the coast guard out as he claimed he was about to jump off a bridge into a very dangerous river. It didn't happen. He tried this several times. He's still alive and kicking, same old tricks but twenty odd years later. Get yourself to a safe place and Do NOT ever look back.

You really need to get the ball rolling with leaving. If you don't make the first step away from him, it'll just keep continuing until God knows what happens.

This is serious abuse and manipulation. He's got you where he wants you; scared and frightened to leave.

I know it's daunting, but you have to force yourself to take action.

I do have my car and I've not drank any alcohol. I just genuinely have nowhere to go other that mine where I know he'll turn up.

I had pictures of my face (the bite) and voice recordings of him on my old phone but he snapped it. I then lost hope of ever being believed.

Our main communication is through WhatsApp and he'll send threats/abuse as soon as he sees I've read the message he'll delete it.

My family and friends live in a small village where I wouldn't be hard to find. I'm also too ashamed to tell anyone whats happening due to the support I received when I left Mt ex and I swore I'd never end up in the same position again

My apologies OP, rereading your first post I realise you don’t drink, in which case please get in your car and GO