Young men hating women

[Maatandosiris]

Something I’ve been noticing is that young men (say under 30) are becoming increasingly misogynistic. Not in the old fashioned dirty old man way but very aggressively trying to take away women’s voices. Anything they can do to undermine you they will, whether it’s criticising politics, eating habits, looks, viewpoints. Any excuse to undermine women they jump on it (aided and abetted by some women I should add)

AIBU to wonder whether all the fighting for rights and equality has been pointless and young girls generally seem content to be treated like shit to the point I’m not sure many actually see the threat. How the hell did we get here? In the past week I’ve had a man gaslight me and try and undermine me in a discussion as a “rebel” for quoting the suffragettes, had a bunch of blokes gang up on me and chuck me off a forum for saying transrights need balancing with women’s rights followed by inaccurate allegations and ignored on a discussion simply because I was female. Not long ago I was told that the way to make things more female friendly was to make them less academic

We literally seem to be reverting back to women make yourself look pretty whilst listening to the views of the oh so intelligent men.

AIBU to think in20 years time women’s rights are going to dead unless women, inc young women start standing up to be counted.

Oh the irony! You are one of the worst not just for posting vile, hateful anti-women comments, but stalking and abuse.

"Look. We gave women a voice and they're turning on us. Beware"

That's your mindset alright. Vile.

Is there another version of mumsnet that I don't know about?

Well to be honest if any young men accidentally read Mumsnet they would think all women hate men. There are some dreadful anti men opinions on Mumsnet.

That is a joke, isn't it? Likely as not, even on threads where women are reporting terrible mistreatment and abuse at the hands of men, the inevitable posts will appear (usually within about the first 20 messages) cajoling her to consider the feelings of the men, downplaying the abuse as not really being that bad, that even if it is, she must be in some way to blame, etc., etc., ad nauseam.

Such attitudes are tedious in the extreme and constant blame women for their own exploitation and abuse (the recent 'why did you have a baby with him?' thread points very eloquently to precisely this issue).

So: either women are perfectly willing to stand as agents for The Patriarchy, to denigrate women and to big up men at their expense, or the site is constantly being infiltrated by MRA types who otherwise wouldn't have the smallest interest in a site mostly populated by women or women's issues, or both.

'Men accidentally reading Mumsnet'. Yeah, right. 😂

@SerafinasGoose yes my comment was meant to be light-hearted.

Ah, sorry! I will remove the Po-Face forthwith ... 😷

@SerafinasGoose no problem 🙂

Isn't it just.

WOMEN gave women a voice.

Have you really not seen how men talk about women?

Perhaps men should stop their misogynystic thinking, abusing women, raping women, killing women….

Why aren’t you worried about that?

’Misandry’ isin’t a thing. Women have never oppressed men.

A lot of Andrew Tate bros out there.

It's manosphere content consumed online

Also a lack of sex/success with women

"Arguing with trolls is like wrestling a pig. Afterwards you are both dirty but the pig likes it"

I would expand trolls to arguing online full stop.

Online it's highly visible. In real world interactions, I don't see it - I work with many young people in my industry (IT), and also as a volunteer sports coach, and the young people I work with and coach are far more respectful than when I was their age in the 90s and it was the era of the 'lad/ladette' culture. It's particularly noticeable in coaching where the male and female athletes are hugely supportive of each other and have a 'one squad' mentality. The men exhibiting typical misogynistic behaviour in my industry (lecherous comments, defaulting to asking a woman to get coffee in a meeting, not properly listening to women's input in a discussion) are the absolutely stereotypical middle-aged blokes in suits, not the young men. Unfortunately they are clients so it's not possible to do anything about it.

I've not experienced anything personally from the younger generations (I'm in my 50s) but my boss (in his 70s) is a misogynist (sly and under the radar) and I call him out on his behaviour regularly. Shouldn't have to but there we are.

My DD on the other hand (now 23) suffered awfully whilst in school, particularly years 10 and 11 with the attitude of the majority of the boys in her year. The stories she'd tell me about conversations she'd overheard between boys, being sexist/misogynistic about their girlfriends was ear curling! her own friends suffering at the hands of these boys whilst in 'relationships' with them i.e. being told they couldn't wear certain outfits, not to wear makeup, not to car share with other boys...the list went on and on. The worst of it all was that the girls would do what the boys told them!! I couldn't believe that these lads, aged 15/16 could have such outdated attitudes towards women. Have they got it from their own parents behaviour?! It's shocking and I feel so desperately sad for my DD.

She has a boyfriend atm. He apparently didn't believe in the male/female pay gap according to my DD. So when he was last round, I engineered a conversation about it and feminism in general. Safe to say he learnt a lot that day with just a very small flea in his ear!! Pisses me right off that we (women) are having to explain why we feel the way we do, why we have to fight for what we have - it's therefore clear nothing has really changed has it, when young lads have to have this all explained to them.

Can't read where I've said there is a rise in misogyny in some places?

What makes you think I'm not concerned about those things?

Oh and I'm not stalking anyone 🤣🤣🤣

I also don't hate women

You sound utterly tedious.

I think it is not the case. Men have lost so much power. Unless, they are trans it seems.

When you are accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.

I do not think they are oppressed. I think women do not have them as priority anymore like in the past. At least that is what I see in the younger generations.

When someone says they can't imagine anything worse than listening to womens hour, turns every thread into 'but women do that too', act as if women are even remotely a threat to men, suggesting men suiciding at a higher rate is because of women, suggesting women commit a third of DV, suggesting that courts favour the women (bullshit!!), and just has to make every thread into 'women do it too', shows an intense, INTENSE hatred of women and a need to derail and make men the victim. Misogyny is as misogyny does, and that poster who I believe is a male masquerading as a woman, is a MAJOR hater of women. Thankfully on those threads their vile misogyny is called out by others.

"When someone posts facts with a link that shows them I don't like it and call them a woman hater"

I'm 100% woman BTW

Your behaviour has been called out for being vile plenty

And you are also a transphobe

Misogyny is different now to the past
It was never gone

If you ever posted any links with actual evidence it would be a first.

The polite, respectful young men I work with (university STEM area) are educated, confident, generally well travelled and heading for highly paid science/tech careers with valued skills. Many of my PhD students/early postdocs get married and start families in their 20s. They are in control of their lives.

What options are there for non-academic young lads these days- call centre or delivery guy? There used to be real pride in the phsysical hard work of a manual job in your town's industry, alongside your dad, brothers and mates. I think a lot of the online aggression and resentment is a misplaced way of acting "manly".