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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Clubbing in your 40s

218 replies

Canisaysomething · 31/08/2023 00:22

Not an AIBU as such. But my DC are finally at an age they can be left with baby sitters and I want to go clubbing. I want a night out in London similar to Shoreditch 2005 - 2010, Shunt lounge London Bridge if that means anything to anyone.

Is clubbing always a disappointment in your 40s or can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 31/08/2023 00:24

Is clubbing always a disappointment in your 40s

Yep.

can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

Nope.

MrsSkylerWhite · 31/08/2023 00:25

^ This

ChannelyourinnerElsa · 31/08/2023 00:26

No, it’s not always a disappointment

no, those nights cannot be recreated. Nor should you try- that WILL lead to disappointment.

WorseDecision · 31/08/2023 00:28

Good luck, you'll be surrounded by babies. Definitely not the same.

Tiredanddistracted · 31/08/2023 00:28

At 41, I find it's good fun as long as you:

  1. Understand that it probably wont be entirely the same as it used to be. When I last went, most younger clubbers just kind of acted like I wasn't there. Honestly, male or female, their eyes just kind of skated over me like I was a glitch in the Matrix that they couldn't compute. Didn't bother me in the slightest, but those drunken heart to hearts with strangers in the toilets/exciting interactions on the dance floor don't really happen to me anymore.
  1. Have a group of supportive, fun friends around you who, equally, understand point number 1 and, equally, don't give a fuck.

Of course that's just my experience and perhaps it's just that I give off weirdo vibes.

808KateO · 31/08/2023 00:28

Aquamarine1029 · 31/08/2023 00:24

Is clubbing always a disappointment in your 40s

Yep.

can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

Nope.

Hard agree.

Time40 · 31/08/2023 00:29

Yes, it can be fun to go clubbing in your 40s, OP! Do it. (Only if you dance all night, be prepared not to be able to walk properly the day after, because hours of dancing really kills feet in their 40s.)

Tonight1 · 31/08/2023 00:34

It won't be the same but you might enjoy it.

Last time I got dragged clubbing I decided it was too much and left pretty quickly. I felt quite disgruntled upon leaving as a couple of men called out "are you leaving already?" and I didn't like being noticed, I wasn't dressed up.

But sure, why not try it. You might have an unexpectedly good time.

SomePosters · 31/08/2023 00:35

I do and I love it more now than in my much more awkward younger years

louderthan · 31/08/2023 00:37

Shunt ♥️ we are the same vintage OP!

AlphaAlpha · 31/08/2023 00:38

Aquamarine1029 · 31/08/2023 00:24

Is clubbing always a disappointment in your 40s

Yep.

can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

Nope.

Disagree.

I go 'out' maybe only 2 or 3 times a year, They're usually some sort of reunion night (or even better, day) from my days of hard clubbing in the 90s/2000s. Events such as Clockwork orange are great, such a good range of ages but the majority I would say over 35 at the least. I'm off out in a couple of weeks to a club night reunion birthday thing, it's a day one too!
I'd say go for it, life is what you make it, it's not as if you want to go to a dodgy ikon/oceana type place!

drearydear · 31/08/2023 00:39

I felt old the last I went into an actual night club, and that was when I was in my mid/late 20s. I wouldn't dare go in now.

I feel the nostalgia for the late teenage clubbing nights particularly. Great times.

You should go if you want to, but I'd love an update on how it went please. @Canisaysomething

louderthan · 31/08/2023 00:39

Used to spend most Friday/Saturday nights in Catch on Kingsland Rd circa 2007-2009. Then usually to the Axe for the rockabilly night that was on til 4/5am...

VeryGoodVeryNice · 31/08/2023 00:40

I’d rather shit in my hands and clap 🤣.

I did end up in a club of sorts a few months ago, on a works night out, not through choice. The music was shite, it was full of people young enough to be my kids, I couldn’t wait to leave.

rose69 · 31/08/2023 00:46

nothing can compare with shunt. But are places in Brixton that have a slightly older age group.

SiouxseeSioux · 31/08/2023 00:48

No, it's not always a disappointment. It depends on where you go & who the clientele is. Not everyone has given up on going out & letting their hair down once they hit 40; and why should they?
You can't recreate your 20's. The people & music will be different. There will be places that have a mixed age range & it's those places you have to seek out. Avoid the places that will be just full of young kids; or try bars that have live music & are open late. Try to create a new experience of a night out, not your night out from 20 years ago.
In the city where by best friend lives there is a club open til 6am. It plays a wide range of music & the age range varies too. We also go to another bar open til 3am that holds regular new romantic/goth nights. It's full of people from any range, older down through to 20 year olds. There is no judging from either generation. We just all get on & dance.
We don't make it til 6am, but regularly 2am to 3am. We don't get the male attention anymore either but we're not bothered about that. We have husbands & we're not out on the pull but out for good dance & that's all.
We're 58 & been going out together since we were 14 & could get in without id & with good makeup! We don't intend stopping any time soon.

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

Original poster
Canisaysomething · 31/08/2023 00:53

@louderthan I'm craving a night out with a bit of weird theatrics thrown in followed by a morning of recounting what happened. But that probably doesn't happen in your 40s... it's probably just a night out followed by breakfast with the kids.

@Time40 more than happy to wear comfy trainers!

OP posts:
LynnBenfieldsnephew · 31/08/2023 00:53

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

😂😂 what a line!

guiltyfeethavegotnorythym · 31/08/2023 00:55

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

🤣🤣

Original poster
Canisaysomething · 31/08/2023 00:59

rose69 · 31/08/2023 00:46

nothing can compare with shunt. But are places in Brixton that have a slightly older age group.

Which places? I think I need somewhere with an older crowd based on other posts.

OP posts:
808KateO · 31/08/2023 01:01

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

😂That's hilarious.

Could be a classic "reader, I married him.."

Furries · 31/08/2023 01:03

I’m in my 50’s. I love blaring out the tunes from my clubbing days when I’m in the car or at home. No way I could do a club night.

Well, I could, but they’d need plenty of comfy seating and immaculate and plentiful loos! Am definitely not up for soaking wet floors and queues.

Oh, and a limo service please. I’d just want to crash out and be taken home in safety and comfort.

The above is slightly tongue in cheek. Health issues mean that it’s definitely not a possibility for me. But if I was in better health, I’d love to go again - I would probably be paying more attention to what venue/night I picked, the music need to be spot-on.

Tonight1 · 31/08/2023 01:08

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

🤣 Brilliant!

Next generation's line will be: do you remember Wilkos?

StrawberryWater · 31/08/2023 01:09

Can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

No and why would you want to? Nobody is saying you should start listening to Kenny G and pondering the rules to crown green bowling but personally I'd rather put a campfire out with my face that step in another nightclub.

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