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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Clubbing in your 40s

218 replies

Canisaysomething · 31/08/2023 00:22

Not an AIBU as such. But my DC are finally at an age they can be left with baby sitters and I want to go clubbing. I want a night out in London similar to Shoreditch 2005 - 2010, Shunt lounge London Bridge if that means anything to anyone.

Is clubbing always a disappointment in your 40s or can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

OP posts:
ivfbabymomma1 · 31/08/2023 01:09

I'm 35 and I still occasionally (very rarely) go out out but the last time I probably enjoyed it was before Covid

Furries · 31/08/2023 01:12

StrawberryWater · 31/08/2023 01:09

Can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

No and why would you want to? Nobody is saying you should start listening to Kenny G and pondering the rules to crown green bowling but personally I'd rather put a campfire out with my face that step in another nightclub.

Sorry this made me laugh! That is a great description re something you don’t want to do - am going to try to remember it.

TrishM80 · 31/08/2023 02:15

I never really liked nightclubs when I was younger so I sure as hell hate them now!

Mumof1andacat · 31/08/2023 02:35

I find a local pub with a band on is generally better for a night out now I'm a bit older. A local ish pub near me has a function room so even has space for dancing if they have a band.

MaMisled · 31/08/2023 02:41

My DC....21, 24, 26.....promised me they'd take me clubbing to celebrate, if/when I recovered from a serious illness. I've always LOVED dancing. Got well, went to a fancy Brighton club and danced my 55 year old arse off until 3am! Utterly fantastic!

Gooseysgirl · 31/08/2023 02:46

I'm mid 40s and sometimes go out with my uni classmates - we are all postgrads but they are all a LOT younger than me. On these nights out in my head I'm mid 20s again but Jesus does reality bite afterwards... it takes me days to recover physically!!!

august1 · 31/08/2023 02:50

Annie Mac's Before Midnight events look fab - likely great music and all over before 12 as the name suggests! Good luck OP!

Brightandshining · 31/08/2023 02:50

Depends why you like clubbing.
If you actually love dancing and music you'll be fine.
If you are expecting it to feel fun like it did in your twenties when you didn't really go for the dancing you went to look sexy and have drama... no it won't be like that any more.
But im in my late 30s and I love clubbing. Ill go completely sober and dance till 6am. I just like dancing.
So it depends what you want from it.
Give it a go. You might have great fun!

Cherryana · 31/08/2023 02:54

I love dancing.
I miss those days too.

darkestnights · 31/08/2023 03:07

louderthan · 31/08/2023 00:39

Used to spend most Friday/Saturday nights in Catch on Kingsland Rd circa 2007-2009. Then usually to the Axe for the rockabilly night that was on til 4/5am...

I would have seen you in catch then! Now we're on mumsnet, how times change...

darkestnights · 31/08/2023 03:10

I've had a couple of brilliant times at GAY at Heaven over the last 2 years (fridays, not Saturday nights). The hangovers really haven't been worth it though.

Jamtartforme · 31/08/2023 03:14

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Well where else would you have gone for pick n mix and the NOW CD’s??

I’m in my early 30s and haven’t gone clubbing for about 5 years. I don’t enjoy it any more and to be honest I don’t want to bring the atmosphere down for the teens and early 20s clobbers, they want to be surrounded by people their own age not old fogeys like me… there are so many brill cocktail bars and gigs around there’s no need really, I would rather go somewhere more age appropriate and not feel out of place

Jamtartforme · 31/08/2023 03:15

darkestnights · 31/08/2023 03:10

I've had a couple of brilliant times at GAY at Heaven over the last 2 years (fridays, not Saturday nights). The hangovers really haven't been worth it though.

Actually I take that back, I went on a gay night out about 2 years ago and the atmosphere was brill, gay clubs seem to have a more diverse age range so you could try that

Uniqueusername2 · 31/08/2023 03:42

There are places you would enjoy but it might take a few tries to find them. A hidden gem is Coast in worthing if you can get there. Lots of people 40+ reliving the clubbing days now the kids are older, great music and super friendly. Also festivals. Try camp bestival and take the kids. Or shambala. Some have little daycares.
happy second clubbing childhood

pilates · 31/08/2023 03:58

I remember when I was young and clubbing, you would look at the older ones and think why are you here.

TrickorTreacle · 31/08/2023 05:07

@Canisaysomething - do it properly.

Godskitchen.
Trancecoda.
Ministry of Sound.
Passion.
Cream.
Amnesia.

House/trance music. All going strong in 2023. I'm 40s and I don't look out of place.

HashBrownandBeans · 31/08/2023 06:00

I’m mid 40s and still go. You just have to find the right events. Look for reunions, back to the 90s etc. They will all be ‘old’ in the crowd🤣
I’m off to a tech house night at the weekend

PersephonePomegranate23 · 31/08/2023 06:06

Egg? How up for it are you? You'll be getting home at 8am 😂

It's a bit down and and dirty, but attracts an Ibiza-esque crowd so all ages go.

I was more of a Mahiki, Pangea/Vendome, Dover St girl...with the old Egg foray thrown in 😂

Maddy70 · 31/08/2023 06:13

Go. Have fun

oakleaffy · 31/08/2023 06:24

Aquamarine1029 · 31/08/2023 00:24

Is clubbing always a disappointment in your 40s

Yep.

can those nights out in your late 20s be recreated?

Nope.

Clubbing at 37 was horrible!

I felt hideously old.
It cannot be recreated.

Did it a couple of times , never again.

oakleaffy · 31/08/2023 06:29

Beepbopadooda · 31/08/2023 00:51

I'm 34 and went to a club three weeks ago. A man a similar age to me approached me and said "you look like you might remember Woolworths too!" 😳🤦

What a superb chat up line!

🤣

NotTerfNorCis · 31/08/2023 06:58

In Nottingham we've got Rock City which often has a very mature crowd. Have to say I haven't been there in a few years though. Wouldn't be trying to dance if I did.

turquoisediamond · 31/08/2023 07:01

If you go out in the city it's an older crowd as everyone's working and there's a mix of ages. Thursdays are the best day. Then you can end up in a club or more of a pub that cranks the music up feels like a club and everyone dances. There's loads around Liverpool st / Bank.

Oblomov23 · 31/08/2023 07:04

"you look like you might remember Woolworths too!"

GrinGrin

LadyGeorginaSmythe · 31/08/2023 07:08

I still love it! I'm 43 and have had a few nights out over the past year. I like getting dressed up (though heels are far lower now) and feeling good about myself and I just love to dance. It's all about the music and dancing, but generally I'm done by 1am or so and I can still get a decent night's sleep if I don't drink too much.
But no, you can't recreate those nights from your 20s. Some songs still take me right back though and I can get a very happy "high" when dancing to them.
Anything touted as a "reunion" for a place you used to go to will have an older crowd, but when I've been out its been pretty mixed...I'm never the oldest.