MIL and brunch…

[Nikee20]

We were at in-laws today for a brunch thing. We stayed in a hotel and live 3 hours away and we were eating at theirs before we drove home.

MIL said she’d do sausage buns so we had a very light breakfast so we didn’t fill up.

Arrived at theirs and there were 8 sausages for 4 adults and 1 child.

She split them 1 sausage each in a hot dog bun for each adult, 2 sausages for her son (my DH). Then DC was given another sausage.

Son was then offered the spare one.

So I was fed less than my 8 year old DS.

So my question is - is this perfectly reasonable or is she crazy?

YABU - this is fine
YANBU - she is crazy.

Brunch is a substantial meal in place of breakfast and lunch, involving both savoury and sweet components.

Its a feast in this house, but we love our food.

I didn't do the maths - he got THREE? How sexist

Nasty
FiL is obviously capable of eating what he wants, unless he’s passed on this trait of not speaking up for himself to your DH?

She probably realised you had already had breakfast and probably didn’t need another big meal tbh.

My mother always feeds the men more. They are served first, too. She’ll eat scraps, herself. And she thinks I’m fat (size 12).

Did you miss out on a hotel breakfast? I think you were crazy to do that. Once stayed with an older relative who fed us what he would eat (very little) so we made sure to eat plenty when out. He thought we were greedy pigs, as well.

To be fair @moomoosaka he refused it, but I wasn’t offered it. It’s not the sort of place you can say ‘I want it’ either.

WP, my dad eats what he’s given (my mum’s food is basic) Otherwise he’d have to cook. And he certainly doesn’t want to!

@WellPlaced we didn’t have breakfast. We had 1 dry teacake.

That's such a MN response.

You do realise that men are supposed to eat more don’t you?

So many women are overweight and unhealthy because they eat the same amount in the name of equal rights

I get it. So tricky isn't it

@Gowlett we’d have paid more for the hotel breakfast, we won’t be missing it again!!!!!

What 2 sausages more?

Did she know this though, and why did you only eat a dry tea cake? You’re worse than her!

I didn’t eat the same as him, but what I was given wasn’t enough anyway.

in response to the many posts complaining about the men getting more and it being sexist

@WellPlaced as we knew we were eating later, so had something light when we got up to keep us going. We thought we’d get more than what was provided.
Won’t be making that mistake again!!!

That's the way it is here also. It's a meal with a mix of breakfast and lunch offerings. One sausage in a bun is one sausage in a bun. Nothing more and a lot less than should have been offered.

Actually me 😂😂 but I'd never dream of serving it to someone else. My weird appetite is not normal and I'm very aware of it

He wasn’t given enough either!

@Nikee20
Just grab some fast food before heading home. Some elderly people ate light eaters. It sounds as though she falls into the category of a light eater. She probably dies not have to prepare meals for others very often and had list the ability to guage adequate amounts.

I doubt that she had an malicious intent and fast food is usually pretty accessible when you are on the road. Just grab a bite before you get on the road. A day with a lite breakfast and lite lunch is not a major inconvenience particularly if it is a one off.

We were at MiL’s when DD was a toddler. She expected us there for tea. We waited and she didn’t offer anything. We had a quick check of the fridge and and cupboards there was nothing there.
So we said we’d pop out and get some basics in and bring back some food for DD’s tea. She replied, “you two are obsessed with your daughter’s meals” which I found utterly bizarre because we weren’t, she had invited us for tea and dd hadn’t eaten since about 12.
There was no cognitive decline reason for this as she was 72 then and still going strong now at 87. People can be weird.

Three times as much more? And it entirely depends on the man, the woman, height, weight, age, lifestyle.

But she invited them for brunch!!

if I was invited for brunch I wouldn’t eat breakfast / because brunch is a treat - it’s supposed to be a bit luxurious - breakfast and lunch. Fresh bread, fresh coffee, orange juice, maple syrup with everything, croissants, waffles, strawberries - I’m off again😂😂.

what MIL should have invited them for is a sausage bap. That isn’t brunch by any definition. She tried to make it sound fancy.

call at mine for a cup of tea and a sausage bap is very different from an invitation to brunch.

Better off eating in your hotel, she sounds mean. Don't invite people, especially family to eat if you aren't going to go full mother Hen on them and feed them till they are stuffed silly. Every older aunt/grandmother I know does that, food is their way of showing love. I wouldn't go back there.

Why on earth not? What would happen if you did? Your MIL wouldn't spontaneously implode, would she?

Makes me nostalgic for the thread last year where the OP and husband in a similar situation ordered a giant takeaway to the in-laws.