Help me do this pl - splitting holiday villa costs

[captainmarvella]

Morning. Planning a landmark event celebration next year in pool villa in a very sought after destination spot.

Bedroom 1 - DH & I
Bedroom 2 - Best Friend and her DH
Bedroom 3 - Friend's teenaged kids (2)
Bedroom 4 - Friend's BIL & his DP
Bedroom 5 - Friend's BIL's adult child

Villa rental is 3000$ / week. Friend has suggested that each family pays 1000$.

I feel grumpy that the split is a threeway when my DH and I will use only one bedroom. But DH says not to make a fuss as it is a long awaited celebratory holiday and by being tight we will cast a shadow over the happy planning stage (we are not rich AT ALL but a bit more financially secure than my friend's or her BIL's family)

AIBU in thinking that I should be paying less for the villa rental.

As the adults will get the nicer rooms I'd go with 3 way split. However this could be great springboard to say, "even though there is just 2 of us we are happy to pay 1/3 of villa, but can all other costs once we are there be per person?" You can do a kitty or pre load a credit card based on per person input . Teenagers eat and drink a lot , as much if not more than adults.

I would say "happy to pay 1/3 for the villa cost but just want to check we won't be splitting all other costs in three given there's only two of us?".

I'm waiting for her to reply "No need for a calculator, dividing by 3 is easy enough 😄😙"

Glad you've messaged her before things got out of hand.

I could suck to the accommodation but would not be prepared to split food and other stuff 3 ways.

3 double bedrooms with en suite, balconies and scenic view. All in the first floor.

one bedroom with bunk beds. Not ensuite. No balcony, but window opens to the cobbled pathway below.

One bedroom with a single bed. Not ensuite. No balcony, small window with a view of inner courtyard.

The teens and the adult child have a (spacious) common bathroom in the ground floor, that they will share.

Glad you messaged but considering someone put the effort into finding a really nice villa, not sure they will go for a hotel. It will be thousands more as you'll need to eat out all the time too.

I think you should have just said, how about adults count for 1 and kids for half? And sent revised costs.

As there will be 5 rooms, the fairest split is by fifths, so:

£600 OP and DH
£1200 Friend, her DH and 2 kids
£1200 BIL, his partner and their child

Bills could also be split by fifths as this is proportionate. If you want to alleviate a small amount of the cost, you could treat everybody to an activity or pay the whole bill for one meal. If friend is a true friend, she will be on board with this.

Sorry I had missed this and kept asking when you'd already answered

How about $500 per double room with ensuite, $300 per room without ensuite, plus another $100 per person?

Bedroom 1 - DH & I $700
Bedroom 2 - Best Friend and her DH $700
Bedroom 3 - Friend's teenaged kids (2) $500
Bedroom 4 - Friend's BIL & his DP $700
Bedroom 5 - Friend's BIL's adult child $400

Do you all get our own bathroom?
If you are all paying the 1000, you should have your own bathroom if that is possible.

If you haven't already sent that, don't. Suggesting that division by three is complicated just makes you sound a bit bonkers plus, as people have said, going to a hotel will be much more expensive - and it sounds as if the villa she's found is lovely. I think it's better so say that the three way split isn't really fair and suggest a fairer split that recognises that the children's rooms are inferior to the others.

Id stick with the Villa, but make sure to say that meals out, shopping should be split fairly.

Otherwise you will be subsidising them all week

Oh for God sake, stop overthinking it. Split the villa 3 ways. The kids rooms aren’t as nice as the adult rooms.

Ask to split the grocery food shopping per person.
Ask to split the restaurant bill per family (do this when ordering to make it easier for the waiter)

job done.

Yeah. I could handle one hit but not a holiday of subsidising everyone.

I would think of it this way:
Is £1000 a good deal for you? I mean, would you be happy if you paid this much for a holiday like this off your own bat? If do, pay the money.

But if you would not have paid £1000- or it's too much for your budget- then tell them that it's too expensive for you this way.

This situation would spoil the holiday for me.

Before I'd even read the whole post I was thinking a cost per room

I still think that now

Yeah. This is true

Agree with this.

Also agree with PP's suggestion of a kitty for the meals, but with $100 contribution per adult and €60 per teenager. Assuming the teenagers (and I include the 19yo) won't be drinking alcohol with the meals if you're going to the US.

Expect its £400

I'd take the hit on the 3 way split as the adults are getting equal rooms and the kids rooms are inferior.

However, you do need to raise how the rest of the expenses will be split before you go, otherwise you're going to inwardly seeth every time a bill is split 3 ways.

We rent a huge cottage. We divide the cost by employed adults.... The ones with no dc pay a food contribution (£10 per day) also then me and dh pay the rest as we have dc.. We never eat out as no real opportunity.. Each pay own ferry costs. Worked out well for a decade!

I think I'd suck it up for the villa given its a good price and the "kids" have lesser rooms, but before paying I would be clear that's only if meals and shopping are split per eater.

The whole thing is a minefield!

Is it worth souring a friendship for a couple of hundred dollars?

Friend has replied that hotels are out, as her BIL's DP and child both feel overwhelmed at the thought of a hotel and want the privacy of a villa.

I feel for them, as I am neurodivergent and often shun crowds. I and DH have decided to pay 1/3rd of the villa as friend has suggested in the common whatsapp group. Now it's my turn to write a message asking friend privately about food arrangements and bills.