Feeling left out because I don't have a girl

[elive]

I have two lovely sons, DS1 is 5 and DS2 is 3. I have 5 very close friends, every single one of them has a DD who is about 4 (all in the same school year everything), this wasn't planned obviously, 3 of them are born within 4 months of one and other, the others a little later. Most of them have other kids too, one has a 2 year old boy, another a 6 year old boy, so I can bond with them over that.
Right now all their girls are due to start their first year of proper school, they are all bonding over that, buying their cute uniforms etc. Last year my son started and I didn't really have anyone to share it with.
The girls all do ballet together on a Saturday morning, the school they do ballet at has a cafe so they all sit and have a cuppa together, neither of my boys want to do ballet, even if they did it is done on school years, so I'd be there at a different time.
When they were babies, it was much much less noticeable my son and the 5 girls were born within 18 months of each other, the baby stage and even toddlers was great.
Now the group chat is all buying the right ballet clothes, sharing cute outfit ideas etc. I just have nothing to contribute.

AIBU feeling left out? I don't really have other friends.

Probably the biggest gap at that age, bearing in mind the DDs haven’t even yet, is the lack of fancy uniform which gives OP very little to talk about.

Let’s start with “Your desperation to believe you've managed to get your children ahead of the hoi polloi is telegraphed from every post you make”.

What was that?

”You're determined to set yourself on a little pedestal, aren't you? It's quite fascinating. And a little sad.”

No assumptions at all.

Sure they do. Which is why you’ve not experienced differences in wealth.

To be fair, it was in response to your myriad posts on the "gap" between privately educated kids and state schooled kids.
Which you can't explain any further than "they have different parties", "they're two separate social groups who don't associate with each other" (demonstrably untrue).
But I apologise if I've been too personal.

I did not say any of those things.

Just like I didn’t make the comment about residents parking tickets. I think you’re the one who’s defensive.

Well, you did.

But on a very basic level the friendship groups of the children, the types of parties, the cost of
life in general

As examples of gaps that can exist. I did not say all are true for all people.

This says more about you. Those with children in private school are amongst the wealthiest. Those amongst the poorest attend state schools. If you think there aren’t a difference between lifestyle your ignorant. How many low income household parties have you attended? Versus high income? Same thing? Get real.

Actually, you know what @JenWillsiam, I don't want to argue with you anymore, this is very unedifying.
I hope you're as happy with your choices as I am with mine. I'll say no more.

Stop making assumptions about my choices. I can tell you now you’ve made several and have been very very wrong. But to suggest that those with kids in private school have the same financial circumstances as low income households is beyond offensive.

Having said I'll say no more...

I can't let this pass -
But to suggest that those with kids in private school have the same financial circumstances as low income households is beyond offensive.

I've suggested no such thing, it would be insane to think anything of the sort. We weren't really talking about low income families, though, were we?
We were discussing your assertion that anyone who can afford private school wouldn't send their kids to state school.

Definitely checking out now...

Only you have with your statements that there is no difference between the parties and the implication that I said something offensive when I said that there was.

You asked what the gaps were between private and state kids, that was an example. And it’s a real one.

It’s almost like you’ve got a consistent issue here with cognition.

No one’s ever said that though. Of course they haven’t. That doesn’t even make sense!

Only HarrietJet did.

Oh, stop it 🤨.
I did not. I'm not an idiot.

Yes you did. You’ve made multiple statements that weren’t accurate. Residence passes anyone?

That wasn't me, actually. I just pointed out that only residents could buy guest passes. Take it up with whoever your real beef is with.
What other inaccurate statements have I made, apart from the ridiculous rubbish about low income families being able to afford everything high income families can, that you've decided to credit me with?

And I never said otherwise so why did you jump onto that weird bandwagon?

@HarrietJet don’t waste your time nor energy. On the basis of other threads @JenWillsiam sometimes struggles and we should be sympathetic to that

Really? Says the person who’s spending time digging through old threads AND misrepresenting what I said. Or maybe you genuinely didn’t understand. Either way the person who some pretty obvious struggles is you.

I did say ‘in my experience’. That is what I’ve experienced.

Constant talk about DC is tedious. Surely you all have other stuff to discuss?

Also, girls don’t fall out all the time. Mine don’t. I hate that stereotypical nonsense.

Hi OP,

I’ve only read the first few pages and I understand why you are feeling left out. Would you have any interest in going to the coffee after/during ballet? Could you talk to your friends and explain how you feel? I have a similar size mum friend group and I’d hate anyone to feel left out.

This doesn’t sound great for you, I am sorry. I think overall it would be nice to make new friends you can bond with too, this will happen naturally with football, rugby, golf and school etc.
also give it about 1-3 years and they will likely be squabbling etc! The cute bit never lasts forever.