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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

There are two sexes…

635 replies

ItJustFellOutLikeWordVomit · 23/06/2023 13:34

Well just that really….I have gay, straight, bi sexual and transsexual friends and absolutely have no problem with that, very much a do what makes you happy person.

Butttt….AIBU to think the world is going a bit mad with all the non-female, cis female and whatever other labels are floating about. I’m a woman and that’s that, you are either biologically a male or biologically a female and I don’t mean that in an insensitive way dress how you like and date who you like but surely we can’t just be inventing different/new sexes and telling straight women they are no longer a woman they are now XYZ?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
22
Codlingmoths · 23/06/2023 14:30

ASGIRC · 23/06/2023 14:25

But its not... Its akin to being gay 30 years ago.
Its incredibly hard for the people who have to live through it.
And Im sure no one is CHOOSING to have a harder life just because its "trendy".
Just like no one chose to be gay..

That is not to say that there arent some confused people, who mighthave body dismorphia and confuse that as being trans. But it isnt cause its trendy...

For many teenagers it’s more akin to being goth or emo I think; it’s a presentation and self image that they are comfortable with in our highly gendered world. Unfortunately with the possibility of medicalisation and life long consequences.

ItJustFellOutLikeWordVomit · 23/06/2023 14:32

Well thank you all for the info but from what I can tell children with dsd still do have a sex it’s just not as obvious at birth….

I’m still wondering though from the 6ish people of the 129 who have voted I’m in the wrong I wonder about what part of it is wrong?

though I’m glad I’m not alone in my feelings, the news would have you thinking the vote would be the other way around and only a handful of people would agree with me

OP posts:
Changeforachange · 23/06/2023 14:32

@ASGIRC

Teenagers go though horrible social trends.
It was anorexia in my day.
Self harm the decade after.
This is IMO, the most recent 'trend' in young women really struggling with their bodies and the societal expectations & burdens put on young women.

I don't doubt life is easier to be not profoundly uncomfortable with your body, but that doesnt happen in a vacuum & there is an element of social influence - I believe it's partially a trend, but yes, not 'trendy'.

I think this is very different to sexuality.

luffkinks · 23/06/2023 14:32

People with DSDs are not a fucking 3rd sex!!
They are incredibly offended by this.
There is no such thing as 'intersex'
Go online and educate yourselves!

This ....

Museya15 · 23/06/2023 14:34

But there are only two, that's nothing new.

viques · 23/06/2023 14:35

Bromptotoo · 23/06/2023 14:01

Everyone is treated as male or female at birth depending on genitalia etc. If it's not clear then somebody will make an informed judgement. If there's no penis then that judgement is likely to be a tick in the girl/female box.

Later down the line, when puberty should be kicking in, some will prove to have been wrongly called at birth. Medical and social science will give us the tools to deal with it.

We have the tools to deal with it. Chromosome testing will identify the sex. Surgery can help with external and internal genital issues. Hormone therapy can help to address lack of particular hormones needed to support sexual and physical development. It might not be perfect but it means childrens lives and development , and the mental health that goes with that can be supported.

it is undeniably sad that in some parts of the world the health issues can’t be sorted due to poor primary health care and lack of resources. Even sadder that in some parts of the world young people with DSD are sought out and used to bolster athletic programmes with the hope of winning international competition, comes at a cost, usually the health and well-being of the person with DSD.

GoldfincTart · 23/06/2023 14:35

It's the opposite of progressive. It's 1950s-style sexual stereotyping that promotes the idea that if a woman isn't keen on frocks and pink and baking and babies then perhaps she ought to think about being a man. And vice versa. It's homophobic: so many of the young people being referred to the Tavistock Clinic for sex hormones and surgery were lesbians or gay lads that the staff there used to joke about there being no young gay people left.

It's a way of putting women and feminism and lesbians and gay men back 50 years while most of the population couldn't see what was happening and cheered it on.

Circumferences · 23/06/2023 14:35

Being trans is the super trendiest thing in the world right now, while gender ideology makes out that same-sex attracted people are bigots. "Sexual racists" I believe according to Stonewall??
Trans and gay are nothing to do with each other.
Trans and DSD have nothing to do with each other.
Gender ideology is in a league of it's own.

Bromptotoo · 23/06/2023 14:40

Circumferences · 23/06/2023 14:35

Being trans is the super trendiest thing in the world right now, while gender ideology makes out that same-sex attracted people are bigots. "Sexual racists" I believe according to Stonewall??
Trans and gay are nothing to do with each other.
Trans and DSD have nothing to do with each other.
Gender ideology is in a league of it's own.

Are you in the UK?

MoirasSaggyBundles · 23/06/2023 14:41

Everyone is male or female. Some people have additional X or Y chromosomes that result in DSDs - differences in sexual development. This does not make them a different sex or a third sex. It means they are a male or a female with a genetic condition. "Intersex" is an antiquated and offensive term, that bodies representing people with DSDs have asked no to be used.

25sheets · 23/06/2023 14:42

SummerLovingg · 23/06/2023 13:42

Some people are born neither male or female.

Everyone is either male or female. DSDs are medical conditions but either male or female

CatchYouOnTheFlippetyFlop · 23/06/2023 14:43

jonahjones · 23/06/2023 14:02

I personally know of 2 babies now young adults that were born 'intersex' with ambiguous genitalia. After further investigations it was decided one child had more male characteristics and the other child more female. apparently as many as 1 in 1000 babies are born this way but it is (was) such a taboo that was never spoken about.
lady Colin Campbell was born this way too.
So this is probably what the poster means by some people are born neither male or female.

No you don't

Hotsummerlatenightstrolls · 23/06/2023 14:43

BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 23/06/2023 13:52

Caster semenya is a male with a specific dsd. They are not a 3rd sex

She is intersex female, not male.

jc12689 · 23/06/2023 14:45

Rainbowshit · 23/06/2023 13:44

Bullshit. Every single human in the planet is either male or female.

Yo do get intersex people but it's a defect of birth rather than a 'sex'

ItJustFellOutLikeWordVomit · 23/06/2023 14:46

Also apologise for using the term intersex rather than dsd that was my ignorance so I’m sorry if that offended anyone that was 100% not my intention

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 23/06/2023 14:47

Hotsummerlatenightstrolls · 23/06/2023 14:43

She is intersex female, not male.

His XY chromosomes say that he is definitely male .

Butchyrestingface · 23/06/2023 14:47

CrispsnDips · 23/06/2023 13:43

Had to apply for a new Driving Licence and it was refreshing when they asked if I was male or female - could have been a multitude of options 😃

DVLA are not here for any woke shite.

nothingcomestonothing · 23/06/2023 14:48

Hotsummerlatenightstrolls · 23/06/2023 14:43

She is intersex female, not male.

Semenya has 5ARD, a condition which only affects males. You know all those coy press and BBC articles about Semenya having 'naturally occuring high testosterone levels'? Yeah, that was from the testicles Semenya has. It's totally natural to have much higher testosterone than women, when you are male. Semenya is a biological male with a DSD, not a woman.

TheShellBeach · 23/06/2023 14:48

Hotsummerlatenightstrolls · 23/06/2023 14:43

She is intersex female, not male.

"Intersex" should not be used!

CatchYouOnTheFlippetyFlop · 23/06/2023 14:48

Fucking hell. The ignorance of some people on here. Spouting bullshit facts as truth because it's on wikipedia 😂

Wouldn't be surprised if some people believe 'intersex' (horrid word) people can get themselves pregnant ffs.

SinnerBoy · 23/06/2023 14:48

Sistanotcista · Today 13:50
Mamabear04 · Today 13:47

Some people are intersex so there are three sexes, female, male and intersex. Gender is a whole other story.

Exactly this. Look up Caster Semenya for a real life example.

There's no such thing as intersex, it's outmoded and people with DSDs (Disorders of Sexual Development) dislike it and as that it isn't used to describe them.

Caster Semanya was thought to be a girl, but developed a micropenis, as he aged. He has very low testosterone, for a male, but nevertheless, male he is, even though he was allowed to compete as a woman.

All people with DSDs are either male, or female, even if their phenotype (outward appearance) would tend people to assume that they are the opposite sex, or androgynous.

FourTeaFallOut · 23/06/2023 14:49

TheShellBeach · 23/06/2023 14:47

His XY chromosomes say that he is definitely male .

Yup, just ask his kid who arrived on account of his male gametes.

MoirasSaggyBundles · 23/06/2023 14:51

Caster Semenya is not female. the Court of Arbitration for Sport (CAS) found that CS has 5-alpha reductase deficiency (5ARD), a genetic disorder where the normal male sexual development fails in utero, resulting in a pseudovagina, that is to say, genitals that appear to be a vagina at birth, but are in fact the result of a very-undervirilized penis. CS has internal testes and a Y chromosome. Only males have those.

Sceptic1234 · 23/06/2023 14:52

viques · 23/06/2023 14:35

We have the tools to deal with it. Chromosome testing will identify the sex. Surgery can help with external and internal genital issues. Hormone therapy can help to address lack of particular hormones needed to support sexual and physical development. It might not be perfect but it means childrens lives and development , and the mental health that goes with that can be supported.

it is undeniably sad that in some parts of the world the health issues can’t be sorted due to poor primary health care and lack of resources. Even sadder that in some parts of the world young people with DSD are sought out and used to bolster athletic programmes with the hope of winning international competition, comes at a cost, usually the health and well-being of the person with DSD.

This is not really true as most DSDs involve an inability to correctly metabolize testosterone, or a defect in the proteins that allow cells to respond to the hormone. DSD patients usually have very high levels of circulating testosterone but cannot respond properly to the hormone. You cant really correst this by just giving more.

In the 50s / 60s / 70s many patients were surgically made to look as female as possible and their parents told to raise them as girls. Some testosterone is normally metabolized to oestrogen and this can be enough to stimulate breast development. If there is complete insensitivity to testosterone this could work out OK.

However, complete insensitivity is very, very rare and so many DSD patients can also got male secondary sexual features, facial hair, muscle growth.

SmartHome · 23/06/2023 14:52

Caster Semenya is a male with a DSD. There is no such thing as intersex and the term is no longer mediclaly used.

Caster Semenya is about as far from possible as being a woman - as you can clearly see in the video linked in the many threads about him - I cba to go and find it again right now. Look at the last CS threadon here a couple of weeks ago.