My wedding rings are missing and I think my child gave them to a friend

[threeisacharm18]

Long and short of it is - my DC and her friend were playing in my house. They went up to my bedroom where my rings are normally on the nightstand.

Next day I noticed they were missing. I asked DC if she had given my rings to her friend . She said no.

When her friend was leaving she tried to give her a wind chime which I'd discouraged.

Previously D.C. friend had taken an inconsequential item from her house and given it to my dc which I gave back to the mum.

I know my dc has an active imagination and often makes up stories and is susceptible to suggestion. She's 5. Anyway I thought I'd leave it for a day or two and ask her to talk me through the day when her friend came over. And I asked again did she give my rings to her friend and this time she said yes.

Again because she's not always truthful I left it for a day or so and then today I asked her to talk me through the day her friend came.
She told me they found some rings and that she gave them to her friend. I asked her if she gave anything else to the friend and she said she gave the friend a teddy bear which talks. She does have a talking teddy but it's not the colour she told me. However there is a missing teddy among her toys.

So now I have an unreliable child witness and missing personal item.

I need to ask the mum of this child but I don't want to come across as accusatory.

What would you do?

I wouldn't leave it at all, just immediately call the friends parents and explain you daughter is in a 'gifting' stage and has given your wedding rings to so and so. Hopefully they will have a laugh with you, whilst manically searching their house up and down for you valuables :)

Especialy the bits about "nightstands".

She's not always truthful.

This is the issue OP. It's natural for kids to 'give gifts' she wouldn't understand the value of it. But telling lies is another matter. Something to work on.

Does everyone take their wedding rings off?

What are 'wedding rings' ?

Wedding and eternity band?

I never remove mine.

So what was the outcome OP ? unless this is yet another AI thread

How you've spoken to Mom and it's sorted op.

They're clearly not old enough to be trusted to play unsupervised upstairs.

That’s a new suggestion to the thread!!

😂

And the cheque!

Should say cancel the cheque!

CANCEL THE CHEQUE!!

Hmm it depends on parents and children and guests. Some parents I know are specifically no children upstairs with guests on play dates and some parents don’t mind or aren’t strict. If it were me I’d be no going into rooms apart from child’s.

Just talk to the other mum and ask her!

Although am sure if she's seen her child with these new rings she'd have said something by now

Definitely talk to the mum.

And cancel the cheque.

Oh, and make sure you get in touch with HR.

Jeez I've been on MN far too many years goddammit

well I have 4 wedding rings:

1. was a very expensive custom one made white gold and gem stone to match my engagement ring, my engagement ring then broke 3 times before the wedding because I'm heavy handed and never realized how soft white gold is. Its never been worn as I stopped wearing engagement ring before wedding and even just sat in the box has started to show signs of how fragile it is.

2. was a much cheaper chinese ring made out of silver and the same gem stone that looked similar. This one was used for our actual wedding and it was stunning but unfortunately we discovered this oxidized awfully with hand sanitizer during covid and stained a black band on my finger.

3. I bought a cheap plain titanium band as a stand in, it worked very well as a daily ring but was dull and boring matte grey band.

4. I upgraded to a stainless steal replica of my DH diamond ring, its sturdy and a great daily ring plus much shinier (never scratches or dulls) and far prettier than number 3.

Honestly each ring has gotten cheaper and better lol.

I’ve just had a thought, does anyone else think OP should just ring the other mum? Weird that no one’s suggested this.

Here for the non-resolution …

@LongTimeListener1

I know! Why play these mind games with a little child. Just call and say "It looks like the kids were playing in my room and my child says she gave yours my wedding rings; would you mind checking about?"

Just be clear you're blaming your own child, something like "my silly child" and she won't be offended. I would also drop in a line that it's a sentimental item and please don't hesitate to text me about it even if it turns up ages later – you don't want her to be too embarrassed to contact you if it turns up months or even years later

Hope you get them back

cancel the cheque
Ring the other mum

This is why you don't let children play unsupervised in your bedroom, let alone with friends, let alone at only 5 years old. Teach your DD boundaries and respect and this sort of thing won't happen again.