To think the parents of children who are in childcare would like to see them more often?

[tori32]

I CM and have several sets of parents who finish work early on many occasions who never collect their child early. I know I am paid and it does not bother me in the slightest to look after them for their agreed hours, I just feel sorry for the child because they are missing out on this extra time with parents who work full time.

I was a working mum for 3 months (as in not CM) but always collected dd early when I finished early because I wanted to spend time with her. AIBU?

I often used to finish early and still pick up ds at usual time. It gave me a chance to go shopping etc so that when I did pick him up it would be quality time we spent together. Perhaps people just want a while to themselves.

Never imagined I'd be judged for it by my childminder.

spect they just enjoy their time on their own, shopping or reading a book, having a cup of tea, wheres the harm?

yabu
your paid to do a job. none of your beeswax(and i have never used a cm)

YABU

I work 3 days a week and on those days DD has a nanny who we share with another family.

We have a clear routine that gives DD structure and predictablity to her world. Fri-Mon she is with Mummy, Tues-Thurs she is with her nanny. I try to protect that routine.

When I am at home with DD four days out of seven I am able to be a totally engaged and loving Mum. More than that and TBH we both get bored. Therefore if I finish very early I often leave DD with the nanny and use the time to get on with other things, relax and recharge.

Also he would get his dinner at the childminders which saved me having to cook it with him.

I have a nanny. Last week I had 2 days off, one of which I spent shopping. Not particularly exciting "Coleen McLouglin" shopping - underwear, some pjs and wellingtons for the DCs, birthday present for my FIL's 80th , blah-di-blah. I work absolutely full time and the thought of doing all this stuff with the DCs fills me with horror.

I'm pretty sure my nanny didn't judge me as anything other than "sensible". I then spent the next day up on the common with a football and a frisbee while she was having a day off precisely because I had cleared out all my boring routine stuff in the quickest way possible.

I used to think it odd that a work colleague always took 2 separate weeks hols and kept her DD in nursery - so SHE had a holiday.

Then, I understood

We once left dd in nursery for a day while we went canoeing. God, we needed that day canoeing!

Dd much prefers going to nursery then being at home.

I have pointed out that I am asking from a time with child perspective and have stressed that it is not about me working my paid hours (which I have no qualms about). I just don't understand why someone who leaves a child in someone elses care for 40 hrs per week would not choose to spend the extra time with that child if they finished early. That is as a mum, not a CM perspective.

tori32 I suggest you take cover

hercules 1-a chance to go shopping so you never enjoy a shopping trip with your child? Saved you having to cook with him? How awful that sounds. Surely these are things a mother should enjoy??

ha ha nice try

nicetry

Well, after a long day for both of us the last thing he would want would be to spend an hour in tescos or come home and wait for half an hour for his dinner. He much prefered to be playing with the other children in my lovely childminders house and then when I picked him up just having quality time together.

Sorry I haven't phrased the op well. It was a question more to parents who work full time TBH, not part-time.

tori32 - I've never understood why some parents do this, either. Not judging anyone. I just find it an odd thing to do.

well, we dont have a childminder now as dd goes to nursery and dh is a sahp. Shit, do I still need to do those things being the mother?

I work full time

I would never collect my ds early if I could help it. He is far more difficult at home than he is in nursery, where he is calmer and happier surrounded by the hustle and toys. I know this because the girls would describe an atypical strop of his, and I would think they hadn't seen nothin' yet.

As other posters have said, I used the sheltered time to get chores and errands out of the way so that when I do spend time with dcs, I can give them the undivided attention they crave when I am with them.

Far better that IMO than to constantly try to get them to play by themselves so that I can get those chores done, because my dcs won't have any of that.

After a long day away from his mother I am sure he would prefer to be with her whatever the activity.

hmm, screaming around tescos didnt seem that enjoyable to him.