Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be put out that my friend is asking me to pay her money?

774 replies

Sundaycoffee · 12/06/2023 20:15

I was given a very nice perk through work for myself and a plus one for an all expenses paid trip, it included hotel, all food and drink and entertainment for the value of £400 per person and I chose to take a particualr friend. My friend kindly drove us there and back (Bristol to London). She text me today asking me to transfer her half of the petrol money for the trip (£20)
AIBU to think if someone had done the same for me I would let the petrol money slide?

OP posts:
category12 · 12/06/2023 20:25

I dunno why everyone seems to be outraged - OP was given the trip, she didn't pay out for it by looks of it.

So yeah, it was nice of her to take this person, but she's paid nothing while the friend paid for the petrol. If it was a freebie, then it's not like OP was Lady Bountiful.

If I were the friend I wouldn't have asked for petrol money, but if I was OP I'd have shared the petrol costs.

Hellodarknessmyoldpal · 12/06/2023 20:26

I'd reply '😂 thought you were serious there for a second. Good one!' Or maybe just 'get tae fuck' would depend on how i was feeling at the time.

ItsNotRocketSalad · 12/06/2023 20:26

The socially inept tightwads have arrived to the thread. Excellent!

BillyNoM8s · 12/06/2023 20:26

Notimeforaname · 12/06/2023 20:21

Dear Cheryl, thanks for the text asking for the £20 for fuel, happy to call it quits in exchange for the trip. See you soon!

I would say this too but you know her answer will be "but you got it for free, why should I be £40 out of pocket"?

This is probably her train of thought.

I think I'd still split expenses if I gave someone a free trip. Especially if my friend was more broke than me. How would you have got there if your friend didn't drive? Would you have expected her to pay for your train ticket?

Is it a trip she would've gone if it hadn't been a freebie?

WilkinsonM · 12/06/2023 20:27

category12 · 12/06/2023 20:25

I dunno why everyone seems to be outraged - OP was given the trip, she didn't pay out for it by looks of it.

So yeah, it was nice of her to take this person, but she's paid nothing while the friend paid for the petrol. If it was a freebie, then it's not like OP was Lady Bountiful.

If I were the friend I wouldn't have asked for petrol money, but if I was OP I'd have shared the petrol costs.

The OP could have taken anyone. The friend had what sounds like an amazing experience for free. And she's asking for £20 towards petrol. It's petty, grabby, cheeky and crass.

WateryDoom · 12/06/2023 20:27

Can you text back 'Knock it off the £400 you owe me for the weekend. Just send me £380 instead.' 😁

Preps · 12/06/2023 20:28

Does.no one else find it odd that the "host" didn't do the driving? I'll bet there's back story there.

Elvis1956 · 12/06/2023 20:28

category12 · 12/06/2023 20:25

I dunno why everyone seems to be outraged - OP was given the trip, she didn't pay out for it by looks of it.

So yeah, it was nice of her to take this person, but she's paid nothing while the friend paid for the petrol. If it was a freebie, then it's not like OP was Lady Bountiful.

If I were the friend I wouldn't have asked for petrol money, but if I was OP I'd have shared the petrol costs.

But the op was given this as a reward for the work she did...the friend got a £400 trip for the cost of driving them there. The op could have taken anyone to share her rewards, but chose this friend.

If you honestly think she should pay the petrol money I'm just glad you're not my mate

Original poster
Sundaycoffee · 12/06/2023 20:31

Preps · 12/06/2023 20:28

Does.no one else find it odd that the "host" didn't do the driving? I'll bet there's back story there.

No particular back story, just a better car than mine for motorway driving was the reason.

OP posts:
newfriend05 · 12/06/2023 20:31

GoldDuster · 12/06/2023 20:19

That friend would be a not friend from this point on. You took her on an all expenses paid trip to London and she wants £20 for fuel?

Dear Cheryl, thanks for the text asking for the £20 for fuel, happy to call it quits in exchange for the trip. See you soon!

And do not see her soon. Or at all. Nightmare of a person, I cant stand a tightwad.

Send what GOLDduster said and definitely don't see her again ... It amazes me how some people think.. she's very cheeky fucker and I would be fuming

category12 · 12/06/2023 20:31

@WilkinsonM Presumably she took the friend because she wanted her company as much as anything. They both had an amazing experience for free (or nearly free if you were the friend). Her friend contributed by driving them. I think paying half the petrol is fair enough.

MumOfASuperSon · 12/06/2023 20:31

To be fair, you haven’t actually coughed up £400 for the trip.

What was the conversation that led to your friend driving? Did you ask if she would like to share in your good fortune or did you say she could come and enjoy the benefits if she did the driving?

CalistoNoSolo · 12/06/2023 20:32

Preps · 12/06/2023 20:28

Does.no one else find it odd that the "host" didn't do the driving? I'll bet there's back story there.

Cat Love GIF by Kiokuart

No.

Malificent1 · 12/06/2023 20:32

How would you have got there without her?

bibbityboppityboo · 12/06/2023 20:32

An all expenses paid trip?! So hotel, food, drink etc?

Sounds amazing! Your friend is being super cheeky imo asking for fuel money, unless it was discussed up front. They've effectively saved £400 on the experience so £40 in fuel seems reasonable to incur?

CalistoNoSolo · 12/06/2023 20:33

God, this stupid fucking forum.

thefirstmrsrochester · 12/06/2023 20:33

You shared a ‘freebie’ with her which was lovely of you.

There was no financial outlay for you, other than transport from Bristol to London and back again.

She provided the transport.

I’d not see the issue with splitting petrol costs with her.

Original poster
Sundaycoffee · 12/06/2023 20:33

Malificent1 · 12/06/2023 20:32

How would you have got there without her?

I would have driven

OP posts:
XiCi · 12/06/2023 20:33

category12 · 12/06/2023 20:25

I dunno why everyone seems to be outraged - OP was given the trip, she didn't pay out for it by looks of it.

So yeah, it was nice of her to take this person, but she's paid nothing while the friend paid for the petrol. If it was a freebie, then it's not like OP was Lady Bountiful.

If I were the friend I wouldn't have asked for petrol money, but if I was OP I'd have shared the petrol costs.

I agree. I dont think it's fair to ask someone along on a freebie then expect them to pay for transport. How would OP have got there if the friend hadn't driven her? I presume she would have had to pay for transport costs herself. I would have paid half if I was the OP in this situation.

SnoringPains · 12/06/2023 20:34

If I were you I’d have offered to split the cost of travel, but if I were your friend I would have refused the offer. Is she particularly strapped for cash at the moment? Or did she think there was an agreement you would split the cost of travel? Did she offer to drive or did you ask her to? If she offered then I wouldn’t split the petrol, if you asked her to then maybe I would. Needs more context really.

AmeIia · 12/06/2023 20:34

If I was the OP I'd have offered petrol money, if I was the driver I'd have refused it. If I was the driver I'd never be such a cheeky fuck to have asked for half the money.

Malificent1 · 12/06/2023 20:35

Sundaycoffee · 12/06/2023 20:33

I would have driven

Show quote history

In which case I think you should have agreed upfront to split the costs.

Yes it was kind of you to share with her, but the trip has cost you nothing and her £40.

TomatoSandwiches · 12/06/2023 20:35

If you had chosen me I would have probably bought you a thank you gift!

She is outstandingly fucking cheeky.

Dartmoorcheffy · 12/06/2023 20:35

Your friend is the only one who has had to pay anything. Maybe she is broke. Tbh I would have split the petrol costs.

continentallentil · 12/06/2023 20:35

Fucking hell!!

Anyway just say I’ll take it off the 700 you owe me

Or - I think given I’ve just taken you on a freebie weekend worth that I worked hard for , we’re quits.