To be put out that my friend is asking me to pay her money?

[Sundaycoffee]

I was given a very nice perk through work for myself and a plus one for an all expenses paid trip, it included hotel, all food and drink and entertainment for the value of £400 per person and I chose to take a particualr friend. My friend kindly drove us there and back (Bristol to London). She text me today asking me to transfer her half of the petrol money for the trip (£20)
AIBU to think if someone had done the same for me I would let the petrol money slide?

If I were so in need of the petrol money, I’d have made it clear to the other person before the driving even took place, not afterwards. Urg. Crafty of her.

But then again, I never ever would I do what she’s done. It’s actually quite disgusting to do what she’s done.

of course, if the driver is on the breadline then that’s different. But in that case, I don’t think the op would be asking if she’s being unreasonable. She’d have already paid half/all of the petrol during the trip, knowing how hard-up her friend is (though the fact her friend has a more road-worthy car suggests she’s definitely not on any bread line).

So many dense people on here , keeps me entertained no end!

The holiday cost you zero it cost her £40

But it’s £40 for a trip worth £££ with food, hotel included. I’d happily pay £40 for that.

You worked hard at your job….

Is your friend hard up? In some ways I have sympathy. It’s not a freebie for her if she drove.

Oh fuck off, what a cheeky cow!!

I'm not a pisstaker, but if I was the one sharing the gift I'd expect to pay half of any costs we had on the trip. Why would I expect my friend to fund me when I haven't paid anything?

I don't think you can argue that your work is your contribution. Your friend isn't your employer and presumably you do get paid a salary? You were just lucky to get a trip as a reward. It's not like you're splitting a cash bonus with her.

This squared ^
What an ungrateful cow the friend must be.

Actually I think you should have driven but since you didn't then you should pay the £20. She isn't being cheeky as she wouldn't have paid £400 for the trip but she also doesn't owe you £40 for taking her, you chose to take her, why should it cost her?

Blank her and see if she asks twice... just for the fun of it.

God, if I was your friend, not only would I have not asked for petrol money, id of treated you to a coffee at the services on the way there/back to thank you for taking me!

Has she thanked you for inviting/taking her?

I would ignore it. Might give her time to reflect. If she messages again just say I ll get you lunch some time, remember the one on holiday it was so nice...

I guessing you earned this in some way through hard work rather than won it. It's tricky as if you'd have driven you'd have had to had the conversation. She should let it go, I would say it's the least I could do, thanks for bringing me. It sounds like she's not very generous.

Well, no. I've worked in education for 30 years. You barely get the salary you deserve never mind any kind of perk.

Look, I have no idea how well off OP's friend is or not. But when kids were little we were SKINT. I mean, had nothing spare. Ran up our overdraft which increased every month. Every penny was accounted for. Every last penny. I would have fretted over an unexpected 40 quid in petrol money that I hadn't budgeted for that month. Difference is, I suppose, I would have just said that at the start. That I probably couldn't afford the petrol money but the offer was very kind.

The cheek!
Unless you genuinely think she's hard up and would really struggle without the £20?
If not, she's a CF!

Absolutely mortified for her! Mean as ditchwater.

You invited her for a reason presumably because you enjoy her friendship. I wouldn't lose a close friendship over £20 but I probably wouldn't invite her next time.

Rubbish. It was a gift to the OP in exchange for work. The friend got it in exchange for nothing.

I’d reply just knock it off the £400 😂

Me too. If my friend let me come on her trip, I'd be driving and paying the petrol as a thank you.

But equally, if you offered someone a free theatre ticket, you wouldn't also think they should pay for your train fare would you?

Its a shame to lose a friendship over it, but I totally see your point.

How do you feel about transfering the £20.00 to her and when work give you another oppertunity to go somewhere nice again, tell her all about it ...........and don't invite her.

You get the last laugh then OP.

She may just be building up her hopes to join you on the next trip when suddenly....BOOM...... she's not going and oh what a pillock she was for charging you for petrol money when she got a free jolly holly off you in the first place.

😁😁

If she genuinely is hard up this weekend will have saved her much more than £20.

Incredible , tell her to jog on

Yeah, if OP had won two theatre tickets, no-one would expect the friend she took to pay their transport to the theatre, would they? 🤔

I mean it's a shame, OP liked this person enough to want her to come with her, and then they're falling out about twenty quid's worth of petrol.

Not rubbish, I just couldn't sit back in good conscience and watch my friend do all the driving and pay for petrol, on a trip I asked them to join me on!

I'd be happy to spend a great weekend with a good friend. I can't imagine feeling outraged about £20 I'd happily pay for all the petrol to save me the driving!

If I was the friend I wouldn't ask for the money, but if I was the gifter I would split it.