To go round to neighbours in the morning?

[MonkeyDoodles]

Because I have totally had enough.
Next door neighbours just had a loud party from 5.30PM to only now just finishing up. Loud screeching and screaming from the kids, hot tub and all the noise that comes from that, DIY also done in the middle of it all. My whole evening has been a write off because of them.
This is constant. Kids range from 4 years to 10 years and scream and holler to each other constantly for hours on end. My other family members don't want to confront them as are worried about causing an argument but I honestly feel it is having a massive impact on my mental health. Aibu to go round there and tell them it's not on even if my family disagree? It is actually unbearable and causing a lot of arguments in my own home.

Did you call the police by chance?

Police won't do anything for noise nuisance

I actually get your frustration OP , I have a low threshold for noise , which started a few years ago due to an issue with near neighbours. So I understand the anxiety feeling when you can’t relax as noise invades every room of your house from an outside source.

Then I see so many comments on this thread saying you should just accept that being disturbed daily in your own home by the noise of neighbours is fine . What I don’t understand is why people feel the need to be so loud that it can be heard inside others homes , eg loud music in gardens , shouting rather than talking .

I think people underestimate the effect their “enjoying their garden “ can have on others when it comes to noise , or they simply are anti social and don’t care .

it’s important to balance your own anger at this issue . Eg it’s actually fine for kids to play outside , and sometimes they will have the odd scream etc , it’s fine for everyone to enjoy their garden and you may hear some noise , as once the noise anxiety sets in , the smallest noise puts you on edge as well as the problem ones .

I would be tempted to go round when you are feeling calm , not specifically to complain about the party , but to have a general chat about how noise carries in your area , and whatever bothers you most eg loud music , and ask if they could have a lower setting for that . Have realistic requirements, and ask for a small adjustment from them over what causes you the most stress .

i am sorry you are experiencing this, op. It sounds like it’s really affecting your ‘right to peaceful enjoyment’ of your home.

It is easy for others to say you’re overreacting but ,with respect, they are not living it. Are the neighbours the type of people who might be reasonable and sorry if you had a polite word about it? If so, you could say you understand it’s warm weather and while you understand they have the right to peaceful enjoyment of their property, so do you, is there a compromise that could be reached? But be aware it could escalate.

We had an issue with a neighbour’s dog barking a lot at all hours of night and day. We spoke to the neighbours politely which did not go well and then spoke to the council who said we had to keep a log over a period of time so maybe consider doing that. if the noise continues long enough or consistently enough, they might come and measure the decibels and then an abatement order can be issued. I understand your neighbours might not be happy with this and it could cause an argument but equally you are not happy with the noise either. The CNN problem with raising it with the council is if you move, you have to declare there has been a noise complaint and then any sale could fall through… up to you to judge your situation.

Gov.uk says this:

Permitted noise levelsThe permitted noise level using A-weighted decibels (the unit environmental noise is usually measured in) is:

• 34 dBA (decibels adjusted) if the underlying level of noise is no more than 24 dBA
• 10 dBA above the underlying level of noise if this is more than 24 dBA

There is a lot more legal advice on gov.uk
All the best, op. 💐

The old adage of “you must be like them” because you point out that OP can’t legally do anything and needs to learn to live with it or move!

What’s your actual advice to OP? What can she do? Should she go round this morning?

10.45 on a Friday isn’t that late - if they finished before 11 maybe they were trying to be respectful. Sounds like your housing is poorly sound proofed - I do feel for you. But a screaming match and playing the victim isn’t going to help matters much. A calm discussion at some later stage might help more

I had neighbors like that and it was awful. But there is not much you can do as they are unlikely to change. We tried talking to them a few times and they were always apologetic, but didn't change anything.

At the end we ended up moving and it's much better now.

Can you move? Otherwise I think you need to invest in some good noise cancelling headphones.

It always makes me laugh when posters suggest moving to the country and buying a huge plot of land. Christ, don’t you think people would do this if they could afford to? Hell I’d love to own a massive pile in the country with an acre or so of land, private, gated driveway big enough to fit 6 cars on. Sadly I live in the real world and can’t afford it.
In order to ensure you ‘don’t have neighbours’ you have to buy up all the surrounding land and, news flash, that is out of reach fir the average person.
People should teach their children boundaries and not let them screech like this.
Id go with getting up early, mowing the lawn. Then playing classical music very loudly for hours on end.

I know! We once had loud neighbours who would play music all night, have shouting matches and purposely slam doors to annoy us. We were told by them that they have every right to play their music full blast at 4am and that we should move to the country with no one around if we want quiet. Some people are just so entitled and obnoxious.

My friend had this with her new neighbours, they set up camp in the front right outside her living room window. The kids were so loud she couldn't hear her telly. Their front gardens are a sun trap so the neighbours preferred to sit out there.

Her dh fitted a small animal deterrent device on their front wall nearest to the neighbours. The device transmits an uncomfortable ultrasound that only animals & kids can hear. After a few weeks, the kids switched to playing in the back garden instead.

No harm done to the kids ears and good neighbourly relationship mantained.

OP, I feel you pain. A few years ago a private landlord bought one of the houses next to me and then filled it with a family who had - what seemed like -a million kids. In fact it was probably about six, but the noise they made was unbelievable. The kids would be out till all hours screaming away. On top of that they used their garden as one big tip, so everything was awful. They have now moved on and the difference is amazing. We can enjoy the weather in peace and quiet. Only problem is, the landlord is getting the house ready for a new family, so who knows who is coming next?

I think you should stop getting so wound up about noise. Kids make noise. neighbours are noisy. The world is noisy. You trying to control other people and failing is affecting your mh.

Sounds like the stopped it before late. Yabu

I don't think you're going to get anywhere by talking to them I'm afraid OP. I do understand your dilemma, you want your garden to be a space for peace and quiet, but your neighbours have a different view of their garden. And what they're doing isn't really all that bad, so you'll have difficulty persuading them to change their behaviour. There's not much you can do if you don't want to move, but people do move house for these kinds of reasons. I know at least a few people who moved very rurally because they wanted peace and quiet.

Worth a try but I doubt if you will have much success.

I wouldn't talk to them about last night as thats all they'll focus on and they wont consider the everyday noise.

What time do the kids start shouting and screaming on a morning?

It might be worth popping round if its early and say "would you mind asking the kids to keep the noise down a little - DC are trying to have a lie in as they struggled to get to sleep last night"

It doesn't sound like the neighbours are socialising in their front garden though, so if the OP installed this in their back garden, so the neighbours could here it, they're arseholes. Tbh your friend is an arsehole for doing it to their neighbours in their front garden. It may even be illegal, or not allowed under planning law or something. If it's not, it really should be. The neighbours should be able to use their garden without the kids being driven out of it by one of those devices.

OP stated it is a very regular occurrence. I’d be fed up too

As it finishes by 11pm there isn't much you can do, but it would drive me crazy!

Are they early risers? Would you like to borrow my violin for some early morning practice?

Its not just the time. I used to have a neighbour who'd play loud music. I couldn't hear my TV and have to nip to my parents (who in the nicest way possible were fed up of me turning up - because it was I couldn't enjoy my own flat rather than wanting to see them) to get some peace.

As many pps, I'd hate it too, but they are finishing by a reasonable hour and what's being described just sounds like normal (if irritating to those next door) family/friend noise.

The neighbours have the right to enjoy their property/garden until a reasonable time, and 10.45pm comes under that.

Getting a mosquito would put the OP on a far dodgier moral ground tbf.

To those saying nothing can be done - that is incorrect.

The 11pm rule comes under the Noise Act and usually applies to places like pubs and events etc.

This comes under the Environmental Act which is regarding persistent noise nuisance and the local authority can take action against the neighbours.

OP can also apply to the court herself for an injunction to get them to stop.

What an excellent idea.

Really, I'd consider moving. It's kids letting off steam in their own back garden and finishing at a reasonable hour. There's no way they would keep the kids indoors on a hot day. Is it it really every single day? Even on cold, wet, howling gale, off on holiday, school days, etc?
If it winds you up this much, just move away. You're not going to be able to change it

Why should she have to move though? It's the neighbours being inconsiderate and antisocial.

It can be changed if the OP persists down the legal route but it takes time.

Well it's hard to say isn't it? One person's 'screeching' is another person's 'kids playing'. One person's 'music blaring' is another person's 'listening to music'. One person's 'late' is another person's 'early'. One person's 'noisy DIY' is another person's 'getting jobs done'.

I don't know whether they're a genuine noise nuisance or not.