Health visitor came and all she did is criticise.
2.5 week old baby is having too much formula (4oz every 3.5-4 hours) she's hungry and I'm not going to deny her it. I should be waking her every 2 and giving her 2oz apparently. She scared the life out of me saying if I let her sleep for 3-4 hours, she could go into a deep sleep and never come out of it (cot death).
She doesn't like the play mat that we have for her (just one of those soft ones with toys above) as we have a spaniel and apparently she should never be on the floor as we have a dog including for dog hair reasons. Spaniel is 8 years old, not boisterous, we NEVER leave them in the same room together, if she's on her mat one of us sits right next to her so dog can have a sniff of her head then he wanders off to lay down. They are ALWAYS supervised. I would never want any harm to come to her and it's also my responsibility as a dog owner to make sure he's calm and not stressed too. We've kept his routine the same, I put baby in sling and walk for an hour every morning and then DH takes him out for a further 30 minutes in evening. He seems happy and settled, no jealousy or warning signs.
The dog hair, what can I do? I literally Hoover every single day (1 bed flat so only takes 5 mins max), my flat is clean (I actually have OCD), I hate clutter, my DH has been great and we've been keeping on top of everything so it's not like she walked into a state, I'm proud of my home.
She doesn't like that we use the perfect prep machine for the bottles. I explained I can't breastfeed as at first she wouldn't latch despite numerous attempts and help from midwives and secondly my milk dried up so quickly. She was a tiny 5lb 15oz when she was born because my placenta stopped working and she stopped growing. I already feel guilty enough about this and honestly, enough was enough and I chucked in the towel and moved her to Aptamil to get some food into her. She is now 1lb over her birth weight and midwives say she is thriving. HV thinks we should be using the boiling water method.
Apparently I shouldn't have a Moses basket mattress protector under the Moses basket sheet. It's not padded or thick or anything like that, it's super thin and from Mamas and Papas for Moses baskets, surely they wouldn't sell if not safe?
She doesn't like how I held her, on my chest with her head tucked to one side. I do this as skin to skin for a couple of hours a night to make her feel secure and close. She said it's dangerous in case I fall asleep. I do this around 7pm with DH in the room with me.
I just feel like utter shit now. I had 13 miscarriages, this little girl is my whole world and my DH and I have felt on top of the world since having her and really thought we were doing a great job as a team. Obviously I'm never going to know it all and I'm also a first time Mum.
I've suffered horrifically with depression and anxiety in the past including inpatient treatment in a psychiatric hospital after my 13th miscarriage for severe depression and grief.
I was so proud of myself and DH for having this content baby who's put on weight, seems super healthy and we love her so much. I've booked in to start a baby massage/yoga/first aid and music class with her starting in a couple of weeks and now I'm dreading it in case others judge me.
I'm dreading her coming back 😢