To be sick to the teeth of bras!

[4plusthehound]

Yesterday I got dd (12) her first bra.

Last week I got one for mum (92).

I am wearing one - I am 57.

Every year of our lives, no matter what stage of that life we are in, from age 12 to when we die the SAME DESIGN is supposed to work.

Mum has the frame of a an elderly lady now- she has shrunk and is a tiny bag of bones. But her breasts are still there, and she needs to hold them in a comfortable way - a bra? The straps really dig into her, the non cotton fabrics are quite rough for skin of that age, the cotton is either extremely thin or sports thick, the elastic is unforgiving and the bloody hooks are on the back - so hard for her to manage all of that.

For me - after thousands of days wearing them I have a "grove" at the end of my collar bone where it meets the shoulder. But also, the heat systems in my body has changed, the fat distribution, everything.

And yet - in the face of all that change BRAS STAY THE SAME.

I am the only one with this problem.

I am SO uncomfortable

I would be up for that if I could click my fingers and have it painlessly installed! Unfortunately if it involves surgery it's no easier than a reduction. An alternative would be some little drones that tie an invisible hoist around each breast and just hover above your shoulders all day.

I only wish I could bin the bra. But am now a 36jj. I was a 34 jj but gym work has evened my small back.

Your OH is correct and they are making you more unsafe in a crash. They should not be allowed to be sold!

Thank you but when I said I had a wide back I meant it. They only go up to 40, I'm nearer 48 (due to lovely steroids)

Ah, sorry. I didn't even think check what the band size went up to. I do find their cups are set wider than other brands of the same size, so they could well be the holy grail of bras for some women who struggle to find ones that fit, but, nope, clearly not an answer to your search. Good luck!

My problem with that is I would take the extra 10 mins sleeping rather than being organised and lying down after my shower for 10 mins.

I regularly use the hair dryer to dry under them too 😆

I feel your pain op, I am also sick of bras and feel like we should surely be able to do better by now. I just bought this one and it’s ace - I was sceptical since it’s not cup sizes but it’s very comfy and looks surprisingly good on. I’m 32ff and bought it in small. https://www.bravissimo.com/products/non-wired-bra-ce101/#beige-ce101nud So that could work for you, but no good for your mum because it’s a pain to do up.

I have a few of these too and they are comfy but look quite droopy, but they were all I wore during Covid times and now can’t bear to go back to underwire every day. https://www.bravissimo.com/products/nova-bra-ln764/ The first one I linked to looks much better on and is more comfy but these aren’t too bad and are easier to do up.

For your mum I would try something that’s just stretchy all over. I’m guessing she’s not fussed about looking perky but just wants to be comfy - these might be worth a try. Not tons of support but some, and easy to pull on. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Seamless-Padded-Comfort-Everyday-Nursing/dp/B07MMTW41P/ref=sr_1_5?crid=2ECM86DSVPP4B&keywords=Comfort+bra&qid=1686181861&sprefix=comfort+bra%2Caps%2C75&sr=8-5

O god this would be amazing!

I remember in the first year of high school my friend and I talking about starting our own company up designing bras just for big boobs.

We recently met up, both of us with our giant knockers and wished we’d have followed through with our idea. But having big boobs at 16 got us into pubs and clubs and served faster so it didn’t seem so much of an issue by then, if only we knew what 30 odd years later would look like.

Best thing about a double mastectomy - no more bras!

!!

Hells Bells

They really wont, on the odd occasion Ive had to brake suddenly, this morning for example cyclist flew out of a footpath in between houses straight onto the road, I braked hard and the seat belt acts as normal

If they were safe they would come already fitted in the car.

Boobs aren't designed wrong, they are 'designed' / evolved to attract mates during our fertile years and to feed babies, and that's it. Once their job is done there's no need to stay perky. Also, we (and I include myself here) tend to carry a bit more weight than our ancestors did, and a lot of those fat stores go on our boobs.

Anyhoo I ordered two Sugar Candy Busty Bralettes as recommended by @Doggymummar and Susannah Constantine.

Monoboob fears... The degree of 'lift and separation' doesn't remotely compare to an underwired, structured bra, but it's not bad. The gorge (such as it is) doesn't come anywhere near my breastbone but under clothes it doesn't look monoboob.

Support... this is quite an impressive piece of engineering 😂. There are many, many layers of elastane fabric, shaped and stitched into place. It looks like an upgrade of those foam supports that you get in swimming suits - slings underneath (not sure if these are meant to go in the underboob area and sit between boob and chest or kind of cup the boobs?), side supports and a very substantial band. The band feels good and tight, but I'm finding it has a tendency to roll up rather than sit flat. It doesn't slide up as such, but I need to flatten it out again often. But it is supportive and that means tight.

Comfort... pretty good. But all those layers of elastane are pretty sweaty (it's 30° where I am today, 28° in the office). But no wires and lots of stretch is a worthwhile price to pay. It's not like a sleeping bra, it's a lot more structured than that.

Appearance. These are not sexy bras. If that's your priority then keep on walking. But they aren't hideous, and I am of an age where comfort is starting to take precedence over everything!

I'm going to keep them. And bin the underwires.

I'm 36JJ btw, and ordered XXL (though realised after that I'd measured wrongly and should have ordered XL). The band is big - starting off on the second tighest setting - but the cup size is okay. I guess elastane bras are a lot more forgiving of sizing.

Go to an independent bra shop where they measure you by eye. There's an amazing on in SE London called the Fitting Studio. Or Rigby and Peller (but v v expensive). Life changing!!!

I second this. I’d go to Rigby and Peller. Yes they’re expensive but their fitting is amazing. Once you’ve had one well fitting bra you’ll never look back. I’m a 34 H and wear the Prima Donna Deauville 99% of the time. They are eye wateringly expensive but there are often sales and I just tend to buy one new one per year. They are just so much better made and more supportive than all the other makes for me.

Oh thanks for the bra review below!

Inspired by this thread I bought a Bravissimo Nova Lounge bra - in a slightly bigger size than normal as a) was in a hurry b) I'm pregnant.

It's SO GOOD. Comfy, doesn't squish boobs together in front (sweaty), almost forget I'm wearing it.