To be sick to the teeth of bras!

[4plusthehound]

Yesterday I got dd (12) her first bra.

Last week I got one for mum (92).

I am wearing one - I am 57.

Every year of our lives, no matter what stage of that life we are in, from age 12 to when we die the SAME DESIGN is supposed to work.

Mum has the frame of a an elderly lady now- she has shrunk and is a tiny bag of bones. But her breasts are still there, and she needs to hold them in a comfortable way - a bra? The straps really dig into her, the non cotton fabrics are quite rough for skin of that age, the cotton is either extremely thin or sports thick, the elastic is unforgiving and the bloody hooks are on the back - so hard for her to manage all of that.

For me - after thousands of days wearing them I have a "grove" at the end of my collar bone where it meets the shoulder. But also, the heat systems in my body has changed, the fat distribution, everything.

And yet - in the face of all that change BRAS STAY THE SAME.

I am the only one with this problem.

I am SO uncomfortable

Yeah, I'd say they do look on the pointy side to be fair. Was it a Playtex Doreen you tried?
I still wear them when I'm not in a Molke. I'm not too fussed on the look, I'm just after comfort.
Mine do stay separate in them though.

Yes I used to wear a Doreen until someone pointed this out to me.

People commenting about various bras obviously have nice round breasts with nipples in the middle. Any sniff of 'cone' shape and most bras cant cope.

Triumph Flex Smart, I just see it comes comes in 4 sizes now, not just 2. Id like to say I am never wearing an uncomfortable bra again after wearing one of these.

I detest the things right now. I get the most cotton ones I can find and even those the band isn't cotton, there's lots of itchy sticky out stitching, labels, hooks, lacy bits. The more they try to be soft and comfortable the more not-cotton and itchy they are. I'm not even wearing one today and I'm still itchy from yesterday's.

I do and I agree with @MrsElsa .

I had a shoulder injury where I was in a sling that immobilised the shoulder.

It was very hard to get dressed and a bra was impossible.

After recovering from shoulder injury I just couldn’t go back to wearing a bra.

I wear singlet or crop top and I don’t bother trying to hide my nipples with padding.

I am far more comfortable now than I was when I used to wear a bra.

Mind you, I am not into jogging or running so that might change things.

I'm afraid I can only add to the dissatisfaction expressed by many here! I was fine most of my adult life wearing an underwired, cotton bra. Comfortable, no issues. Am only quite small in cup size (B). Anyhoo, aged 50 I managed to hurt my lower back, which evolved into a chronic problem and I ended up wearing heat pads all day, which rubbed up against the bra band. In the end I thought, why carry on wearing bras? I was at home, have small boobs, so I gave them up.

For a couple of years I continued with no bras, but a faulty heat pad gave me a nasty burn and at that point I decided no more heat pads. Eventually I felt I wanted to start wearing bras again. My old bras were very worn out so I went to buy new ones online (I can't go to stores due to disabilities). It was very hard to find a plain cotton bra, not padded, and underwired. I need a plunge neckline for a decent fit. Struggled to find anything. Eventually bought a bra but it felt so uncomfortable round the ribs (reminded me of when I first started wearing bras!). So I thought maybe try non-wired. Still felt uncomfortable, and not supportive enough. Or too tight. Tried Molke. Nope, couldn't manage pulling it on, so got the hook type from them - didn't like all that gathering at the front! Doesn't go well under a T-shirt.

Eventually I found a decent M&S bra but I still can only endure it for about 4 hrs before I need to take it off. I seem to be far more sensitive around the rib cage. Not wearing a bra results in sweatiness under the boobs, even though they are small (of course they dropped once I stopped wearing bras!) and that's unpleasant. I just look better with a decent bra on. Really have still to find something that's comfortable and I can wear all day. Have a pile of unworn bras (and many returned). Sigh. OP I can relate, really.

Try the Triumph Flex one on in a shop, honestly they are the bees knees. I’m converted. I’m absolutely sick to teeth of the discomfort too, but I bought one of these and it’s a total relief.

Bloody inspired!

@CrunchyCarrot YES! It just doesn’t matter what it is, what it’s made of, how soft it is or well fitting, if it’s on my rib cage I want it OFF!

I've been wearing a bra for 50 years. Neither small nor large. Currently 36DD/E.

I have never had an uncomfortable bra. I wear Triumph Amourette, M&S Bloom (underwired) and since Saturday an underwired t shirt one which is soft and divinely comfortable. Two years ago when I smashed my wrist I wore a bralet thingy that I could step into and pull up - had to size up.

I have about 10, wear a clean one every day and they wash and last beautifully. I usually buy two a year and chuck out two a year.

I know, right? I keep thinking what has gone wrong with me! I also get irritated by lace, or twiddly bits, or labels. Ugh!

I was 34c before kids, now 34e. The only bra that really works for me is the Triumph minimiser range. They give me good shape and are comfortable. The best selection is on their main website. They're slow with refunds if you order more than one to try. But overall, really worth it. I've not used anything else for 5 years + now. I'm 52

Get thee to an independent lingerie shoppe!

I go to one near me and the ladies in there can work out your size just by looking at you. It's called Perfect Fit and it's in Keynsham near Bristol.

Mine aren’t big enough to sag 😂 Honestly some women have barely any breast tissue!

Have you heard of Boob or Bust? If not google it and have a go of their calculator. There's a FB group too. You mentioned being a 34B which is a common place for people to start but then the calculator might tell you you're more likely a 32DD or 30F. It'll take a bit of getting used to but the support should be from the band rather than the straps. I went from 34DD to 30G and I look back at the old bras and think what on Earth was I thinking they were a terrible fit! A good guide is that your band size should be no more than your dress size +20. So I'm a size 10, band size should be 30. Your DD might not be at the point of needing a proper structured bra yet but it might be a good idea to measure her too so she can get the proper support when she needs and it hopefully prevent her getting the dents in the shoulders that you have. Sorry if that all sounds preachy, it was pretty revolutionary when I started wearing the right size!

Ive been looking up some of the suggestions on here, found Ms Mary which I like the look of a lot, does anyone know where I can find stores to try these on in the south east? They're 50 quid a pop so I dont want to order a load and have to send them back, it will cost me a fortune

There are so many types of bra these days, for all sizes of women.

There shouldn't be a groove from a bra strap! Most of the support should be from the back band. It definitely sounds like you're wearing the wrong size.
Agree that there are lots of different styles around these days - we don' all have to wear a Doreen!

Please please please look into Boob or Bust especially for yourself and your daughter. I have a large bust currently 34JJ/K. Can barely even tell im wearing my bra, now I have the correct size my shoulders don't feel it at all and the back pain and neck pain are completely gone. It has honestly been amazing and I will never look back! Especially important for your daughter to start on the right path so she doesn't risk any damage 😊

Theres no back strap that can hold my breasts up, I would need a corset and Im probably not alone which is why the shoulder strap will take most of the lifting

I buy the multipack sports bras from Primark to hide my nipples. If I didn't have ridiculously pointy nipples I wouldn't bother with one at all.

A question about underboob sweat - several people have said that a bra helps prevent underboob sweat, but how?? When I wear a bra, I sweat underneath and between my boobs and the bra absorbs all the moisture and stays damp for the rest of the day 🤢 it is most unpleasant.

When I do not wear a bra, the same area gets sweaty, but it quite quickly evaporates, even if it makes my t-shirt wet, that usually dries fairly quickly.

Is there a magic material of bra that will not hold onto the sweat?? I've read about sports bras that "wick away moisture" but then surely they are holding onto the sweat too? I don't want to invest loads of money into one to find it doesn't work.

Absolutely agree op. I have dozens of them various shapes & styles bought at ridiculously expensive prices. Not one is comfortable for more than an hour or 2. I have to change up my bras to distribute the discomfort and out right pain across my body, if it’s not straps that feel like razors, wires digging in then it’s chafing.

And because of the weight of my boobs the support is gone in no time.

I do have a few tricks, large cotton pads help with the painful wires and using a pair of straighteners on the straps before putting the bra on helps extend the strap use a bit longer.

People who don’t have big breasts have no idea what it’s like for us, we can’t just buy supermarket bras and wear our one go to bra for everything because it suites all our outfits.

I’ve been in bras since I was 9yo and come from a long line of big breasted women who have suffered. I have 3 daughters and have a savings account specifically set up that will be available for them to have breast reductions if they choose when they are older because I don’t want them suffering like myself and other women in my family.

I'm a 36G and i do this as I have a fractured shoulder. It's fine

I've tried Boob or Bust, I've tried fittings in independent shops, still can't stand the things. I'm slim but with a wide, prominent rib cage and a tight band is agony. Thankfully I'm flat chested enough to get away with a bralette. Really feel for women who don't have this option.

The amount of time/money/effort expended on this one item of clothing is mad.

When you have big boobs underneath dosnt breath and have the chance to dry. I dry underneath my boobs after a shower and then again another 4/5 times before I manage to put my bra on because of the sweat. In summer I usually put talc under my boobs to try and keep them dry before I put my bra on.