To be devastated

[Bagpuss2022]

I know it sounds melodramatic and I have actually cried over this.
my DH had a day off on Monday he sorted out our unit in the living room. He didn’t tell me he was doing this by the way or would of told him what not to chuck.
He's gone and thrown away a A3 folder of all the kids special bits from school you know the kind the nursery ones with the handprints and that poem. There first mothers days cards y6 leaving certificates with photos on etc. I am ruthless and only ever keep the very special bits
we have 3 Dc oldest 22 youngest 13 so it’s not like I’m going to get anything like that again.
He said he thought it was just junk I know
he's not as sentimental as me but come on he could of least checked with me.
He thinks I’m being silly and is now in a mood with me

I would put his bags in bin then when he is upset with you tell him to stop being silly your kids things isn’t stuff that can be replaced I would go crazy if partner did that

He's in a mood with you??
Blimey, I'd be fuming - my kids are all adults now and I still have their nursery handprints / poems etc.
So Sorry, OP, you are bound to be devastated.

I don't really get this. Memories are what you have in yourself, they aren't bits of paper and cheesy poems with smudgy handprints. No memories are erased by getting rid of the paper.

Still, if OP wanted it he should not have chucked it out. Although if she knew he was clearing out the press, she should have moved it or mentioned it at least.

I have all these things filed and it was lucky I had as one of my granddaughter's school keepsakes was lost by the school. I had lots of her art work, and she is really talented, so we have that safe. I have virtually nothing, no photos, letters, certificates, books
from home, it was thrown out by a relative, sonInam specially careful. I would be devastated by someone throwing out what I have, and my children and grandchildren are happy I have their files.

I would be absolutely heartbroken if this happened to me!! My partner doesn’t really get it/isn’t attached to stuff like this but he knows that I am and wouldn’t do this to me!! I have bags of clothes that I am still going through so that I can keep my favourites/the ones with memories and I know he thinks it’s silly that I’m still holding into so much but he wouldn’t just throw them out!! I have my toddlers artwork pegged up on the wall in the living room and I’ve made memory frames from his newborn and first birthday things and I’m sure he’s not that bothered about them but knows that they mean a lot to me ❤️

I feel awful for you OP, that was so thoughtless of your dh.
I kept various odds and ends, pictures, exercise books etc for my lot. when they left home I offered each one their own stuff to go through. They kept some stuff the rest was binned.
I've kept first locks of hair, birth bracelets and a prem baby gro from my first born which I keep in a special box.

I'd be devastated. I'm very sentimental. Some people wouldn't be bothered. However assuming your DH knows you and therefore would know you wanted to keep them, then YANBU I'm not sure I could even get over that but I recognise sometimes I'm a bit too sentimental

This. Memories are more important than things.

I’m sorry though op, I know it’s horrible 💐

Same here. My house was full of stuff the kids had made at school, but I'd display it for a while then throw it out. I never kept reports or awards or anything really. The only thing I've still got are school photos.

That was pretty nasty of him. If he hangs on to "useless" stuff because of its association with the football team he supports he obviously does understand the sort of attachment you had to those items - he just doesn't have the respect for you to allow you your own attachments.

I'm with you on this.

But I'd only pretend to have chucked his shop bought stuff for a month.
I wouldn't stoop as low as him.

@sheldonia

I don't really get this. Memories are what you have in yourself, they aren't bits of paper and cheesy poems with smudgy handprints. No memories are erased by getting rid of the paper.

What a really thoughtless, narrow-minded, and ignorant post! It is NOT just 'bits of paper and cheesy poems and smudgy handprints.' What a heartless comment.

Years ago, when they were a novelty, My husband threw our iPad out in a pile of recycling 😱

Physical objects and other manifestations (images, sounds, odours, etc.) associated with memories are strong hooks that prompt recall and help people keep memories strong.

YANBU!!!!!!!! I'd be sending him a hunting in the dump!!!! Poor you xxx

I would be beyond angry! I’m extremely sentimental, so I feel for you. My DH isn’t sentimental but I even discovered he has a little box of drawings that he has been storing. I can’t understand how your DH could consider it junk and throw it away.

Good grief @sheldonia Overreaction much?! Having a bad day are you?

If you're going to put comments like 'memories are in your head NOT in physical things' and pass it off as a fact and not an OPINION which it is (and a rude one at that!) then you must expect to be challenged! Now calm down. You'll give yourself a nosebleed.

It doesn’t matter what it was though and whether we’d be sentimental over this particular thing. We all have something we’d like to keep. And if you take the care to put it away in a folder then your OH shouldn’t bin it without checking. It’s a lack of care and respect for your partner.

See I wouldn't have kept them, just clutter to me. Only things I have are exam certificates

Not exactly helping the OP that is it?

What an utter knob.

Just why would he?

I have two folders of things and DH knows I'd murder him if he chucked them.

Ahh sorry he has done that op. That would really upset me too.
We've just had our first family holiday and I've come home and accidentally deleted all our holiday pictures. I have done everything to try and get them back and can't..I'm gutted.

I know to some people things like this might seem like a silly thing to be upset about, but I get it. Those things are really important to some people 💞 YADNBU

I would be raging. His football crap would definitely be in next week's bin too.

This. ^ Any anyone minimising it with 'but it's just STUFF' is being very unreasonable.