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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have left this situation?

202 replies

Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 19:48

I’ve come to see a friend in Aus.

Left my husband behind with the kids for what was supposed to be a really fab girls trip that we’ve been planning for months.

At the last min, my friend told me another woman would be joining too. Totally fine for me, I get on with pretty much everyone.

I arrived and my friend has one single bed and one blow up single mattress (she just moved in) between the three of us. I had to spend the first night literally spooning with a strange woman in a single bed.

My friend (who I’ve come to visit) has met a man and has spend a lot of the trip locked up in her room with him.

The other woman is really hard work. I’m the most easy going person on the planet but I spent 2 hours in a single bed with her, while she showed me every photo on her phone.

After a night of literally no sleep, I’ve booked a hotel and gone there.

I haven’t even seen my friend to tell her as she’s been hidden away with this man (very noisily too, which was funny at first but in the end was quite gross).

All my belongings are in my friend’s room with her and this man.

I’ve come to this hotel in my pyjamas with nothing but my handbag.

I am the least confrontational person ever and so so easy going (even in this situation I’m not that annoyed, just tired).

I’ve booked the hotel for the rest of the trip. I don’t want to share a single bed with a stranger. I am 42 and I earn great money. I can afford a hotel.

I’m not sure what will happen when my friend finally emerges from her room though. She’s going to be offended, I’m sure. And there’s going to be an awkward conversation.

Am I being fussy/princessy? I am just utterly exhausted.

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 21/05/2023 19:50

Whoa. That’s horrendous of your friend. Get your stuff and give it a few days grace. Hopefully she’ll come to you with an apology.

Dacadactyl · 21/05/2023 19:50

What?! Your "friend" sounds like an arsehole.

If she even DARES to mention that you've got a hotel, you should give her both barrels!

I'd actually have to say something to her along the lines of "I've come half way round the world to see you and you're prioritising a man over seeing me. It's not on"

Cheetahmum · 21/05/2023 19:51

I congratulate you for getting the fuck out of there, even in your pyjamas, and securing yourself somewhere you can sleep alone!

AnnieSaxophone · 21/05/2023 19:51

Omg - this is horrendous and funny all at the same time. Sorry OP but you sound bloody fantastic. If I were you, I would bail and go for a trip of a lifetime around Aus and bail out of that friendship!

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 21/05/2023 19:55

Of course you're not unreasonable. That's unbelievably shitty of your friend. How long is the trip? Can someone from the hotel go and get you some cheap supermarket clothes or something so you're not in PJs at least?

PurpleSunshineRain · 21/05/2023 19:56

Your friends an ah! Good for you for taking yourself out of the situation. Make the best of it. Do a tour or go to the theatre - whatever you want to do! Once you get your clothes back of course! I think it's fine if you loose this friend, she doesn't seem like a very good one.

FiveShelties · 21/05/2023 20:00

I don't blame you at all but am in awe at you checking into a hotel in your PJs, pure class.😂

LookingWest · 21/05/2023 20:03

Enjoy your hotel, go back and get your stuff when you can, enjoy your holiday!! Friend’s a dick.

Lsquiggles · 21/05/2023 20:03

Oh wow, I'm assuming this is a guy she can see any time? If so she's a really bad friend and I don't know how you've bitten your tongue and not had it out with her! You must be so disappointed

RosettaTheGardenFairy · 21/05/2023 20:04

So she's invited the other woman along to entertain you while she's pre-occipued with her man, so you're not left alone - how thoughtful & classy 🙄

I hope your hotel has a spa - meet your friend only outside her house; bars & restaurants etc only, do not set your eyes upon the lilo again.

Rogue1001MNer · 21/05/2023 20:04

FiveShelties · 21/05/2023 20:00

I don't blame you at all but am in awe at you checking into a hotel in your PJs, pure class.😂

Perfectly put!

Original poster
Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:06

FiveShelties · 21/05/2023 20:00

I don't blame you at all but am in awe at you checking into a hotel in your PJs, pure class.😂

Haha! The receptionist did give me a funny look. She asked me how my day was going. I said “not very well thanks!”.

I will have to be brave and face the music later because I really want my belongings asap and because I don’t want to write the whole trip off (there have actually been some really fun moments so far when we’ve all been out and about together).

My friend hasn’t entirely ditched us for this man, we have all gone out quite a lot (but he’s come everywhere with us. He’s lovely though so I don’t mind). But the last 16 or so hours have just been a horrendous mess of not being able to get to my belongings, having nowhere to sleep and having to listen to her have sex while I can’t even get to my stuff to brush my bloody teeth.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:07

Lsquiggles · 21/05/2023 20:03

Oh wow, I'm assuming this is a guy she can see any time? If so she's a really bad friend and I don't know how you've bitten your tongue and not had it out with her! You must be so disappointed

No no! She met him in a bar on my first night here. He’s also from the U.K. actually so just here on holiday.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:10

RosettaTheGardenFairy · 21/05/2023 20:04

So she's invited the other woman along to entertain you while she's pre-occipued with her man, so you're not left alone - how thoughtful & classy 🙄

I hope your hotel has a spa - meet your friend only outside her house; bars & restaurants etc only, do not set your eyes upon the lilo again.

She didn’t. We met the man randomly. Nonetheless I do feel she thinks it’s ok to go and do her thing with him because the other woman is here to keep me company.

This other woman means well but she’s driving me up the wall. It’s like having a 4 year old for company.

None of this would even matter if I could get to my suitcase and just get dressed and go out, even with the mad photo woman.

OP posts:
W0tnow · 21/05/2023 20:11

Wait, you’ve flown to the other side of the world to visit a friend and she expects you to share a bed with a complete stranger, and she’s barely spent any time with you because she’s prioritising get new squeeze?

They are not the actions of a friend! That’s incredibly rude. You are the one who should be offended.

TempName247 · 21/05/2023 20:11

Why on Earth didn’t you knock on the door to get your stuff

Sparkletastic · 21/05/2023 20:11

I'd go calmly but completely devastatingly ballistic on crap friend.

W0tnow · 21/05/2023 20:12

Her not get 🙄

WHEN will MN allow editing??

Original poster
Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:15

W0tnow · 21/05/2023 20:11

Wait, you’ve flown to the other side of the world to visit a friend and she expects you to share a bed with a complete stranger, and she’s barely spent any time with you because she’s prioritising get new squeeze?

They are not the actions of a friend! That’s incredibly rude. You are the one who should be offended.

Pretty much this, but she has been around (albeit with him there nonstop since she met him). I genuinely don’t mind having him around with us, he’s good fun. But it’s definitely not the dynamic I’d been expecting. And having to listen to them get to know each other while I had no proper bed to sleep in, was a real low. They were in that room for half the day. She doesn’t even have a sofa so there was nowhere to escape to except the single bed.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:16

TempName247 · 21/05/2023 20:11

Why on Earth didn’t you knock on the door to get your stuff

I’m honestly not sure. I was too tired to think straight.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:16

Sparkletastic · 21/05/2023 20:11

I'd go calmly but completely devastatingly ballistic on crap friend.

What would you say?

OP posts:
RosettaTheGardenFairy · 21/05/2023 20:17

Hollibobsmadness · 21/05/2023 20:10

She didn’t. We met the man randomly. Nonetheless I do feel she thinks it’s ok to go and do her thing with him because the other woman is here to keep me company.

This other woman means well but she’s driving me up the wall. It’s like having a 4 year old for company.

None of this would even matter if I could get to my suitcase and just get dressed and go out, even with the mad photo woman.

Show quote history

Oh this isn't a new boyfriend, just a multiple-night stand?! Oh splendid, that is just terrific 😂

Buy a new suitcase, buy new clothes, buy a new friend if you have to - just don't go back. At least if you pal about with the mad photo woman your holiday will be well documented.

meganorks · 21/05/2023 20:17

I couldn't sleep in a single bed with anyone and I'm certain i wouldn't try. I don't see how your friend could be pissed off if she's the one who has ditched you really. But I want to know how this all pans out....!

FoxtrotOscarFoxtrotOscar · 21/05/2023 20:18

You could send a taxi over to get your suitcase. Not sure I'd want an interface with any of them.

BirbFriend · 21/05/2023 20:19

YANBU. I'd book myself into a hotel too.

Is this typical of your friend? This is absolutely shit hosting if someone has flown across the world to see you.