To have left this situation?

[Hollibobsmadness]

I’ve come to see a friend in Aus.

Left my husband behind with the kids for what was supposed to be a really fab girls trip that we’ve been planning for months.

At the last min, my friend told me another woman would be joining too. Totally fine for me, I get on with pretty much everyone.

I arrived and my friend has one single bed and one blow up single mattress (she just moved in) between the three of us. I had to spend the first night literally spooning with a strange woman in a single bed.

My friend (who I’ve come to visit) has met a man and has spend a lot of the trip locked up in her room with him.

The other woman is really hard work. I’m the most easy going person on the planet but I spent 2 hours in a single bed with her, while she showed me every photo on her phone.

After a night of literally no sleep, I’ve booked a hotel and gone there.

I haven’t even seen my friend to tell her as she’s been hidden away with this man (very noisily too, which was funny at first but in the end was quite gross).

All my belongings are in my friend’s room with her and this man.

I’ve come to this hotel in my pyjamas with nothing but my handbag.

I am the least confrontational person ever and so so easy going (even in this situation I’m not that annoyed, just tired).

I’ve booked the hotel for the rest of the trip. I don’t want to share a single bed with a stranger. I am 42 and I earn great money. I can afford a hotel.

I’m not sure what will happen when my friend finally emerges from her room though. She’s going to be offended, I’m sure. And there’s going to be an awkward conversation.

Am I being fussy/princessy? I am just utterly exhausted.

I think you’re my people 😂😂. It’s very fucking annoying but also why not just kick back in the luxury of your hotel and still meet up and have some fun with your friend. My best friends can all have their flaws (me included 😂) , when you’re close enough with someone you know everyone has their moments. No one died, it was a bit shit for a while, but you’re having a great time with them when you go out with them so enjoy it! Just don’t go sharing any single beds with them 😂!
Im hysterical at the people outraged that you won’t fall out with them 😂😂

I would've booked myself into the hotel on the first night.

Jesus H Christ, that's awful!

In the nicest possible way, What are you smoking? I cannot believe someone would be so chilled about this.
I guess having money does make a difference, I mean you could probably order your own bed fir what you're paying in hotel fees.

When I find myself in a difficult situation I often play the 'oh well laugh at this later' so at least you've got a good tale to tell.
I'm imagining your bed mate as a tie dye dungaree wearing hippy chick with dreadlocks. However you're coping, please share your secret.

I think you've been more than tolerant so far, I wouldn't have got past realising I was sharing a single mattress with a bloody stranger 😳
Good luck getting your stuff and enjoy a decent and peaceful holiday at the hotel.

You could think straight enough to find and book into a hotel in a strange town but not straight enough to knock on the door and get your stuff?

Life is too short to be annoyed and have it ruin a long awaited trip.

What have I got to gain by having a strop? I’ve resolved the issue. I’ll get good sleep the rest of the trip and I’ve still got a few days of fun ahead of me.

I think the correct thing to do in this sort of situation is to bang on the door continuously until she opens it, get your suitcase and your other things from her room, then go to a hotel. Text her to let her know her behavior is abominable. Don't worry about the other woman as she can have the blow-up mattress. Then use whatever money you have left to see as many awesome sights as you can.

I’m not really sure this requires an answer but yes. Your statement is correct.

I’m glad you can see the funny side of this. I’d be too pissed off. At lease you have money to throw at the problem. I hope you get your stuff back.

You went back to get your suitcase at 5:30am? What time did you check into the hotel?

Gosh that sounds like my idea of hell. I’m not the most sociable person so the thought of having to share a bed with a stranger gives me anxiety. I can’t say I blame you and your friend needs to apologise for putting you in such an awkward and uncomfortable situation.

Did you go down for brekkie in your PJs?

This is breathtakingly selfish behaviour from your friend. How old is she? And does she have form for this?

I have been in situations like this as a teen and it was low behaviour then but as you say you have a DH and kids I'm assuming both of you are old enough to know this is deeply shitty behaviour.

TBH and without meaning to be unkind, you are being unbelievably passive about this. I would have given her both barrels. I also would never see her again.

Oh god YADNBU!

Why did she offer to host when she didn’t even have a bed for you to sleep in?! If the lack of bed was an unexpected last minute thing that cropped up why didn’t she buy an extra blow up mattress at least?? Or give you a heads up so that you could’ve booked a hotel from the outset? The mind boggles.

I rented a tiny 1 bed flat when I was 19 with my ex and we had friends to visit so we bought a double blow up mattress from Argos and said we’d sleep on it and the other couple could have our bed, so I wouldn’t have dreamed of treating guests like that as a teen let alone as grown adults in your 40s!!

This sounds hilarious.

I had a similar experience in Australia many years ago. Travelled out to visit a friend and it became apparent her boyfriend didn’t want me there!

I was young and far from home and regret not booking myself into a hotel to get away from them. So well done!!!

needless to say the friendship didn’t survive the trip. She was my best friend and it still makes me sad that she allowed my whole trip to be ruined and didn’t stand up for me. Her relationship with him didn’t last either!!

I really can't decide if OP is being way too passive or just really zen and chill!

Does the friend have previous form for being inconsiderate?

I feel there needs to be a separate thread titled "things you should have fallen out with a friend over but just couldn't be arsed".

She ain't no friend.

Is your friend usually unhinged a free spirit?

Ahhh this is what my perpetually broke friend and I, while we were at uni, called “fuck it money”. We always aspired to have enough money in any given situation to just go “fuck it” and, for example, check into a hotel in our pjs for a better night’s sleep. Good for you for having a fuck it fund OP, and even better that you used it 👌Hope you are now able to have enough sleep to enjoy the trip to the max!

@Hollibobsmadness That's totally shitty of your friend! Why would she do that! Not cool! You did the right thing. You must be very chilled as I would not be at all pleased with her re that situation and would have to let her know it! X

Around 6, as she’d woken up and realised I wasn’t there!

I checked in in the middle of the night. The photo woman was extremely drunk and I couldn’t face even trying to share the bed with her in that state.

Just for context, I do love a good drink too. It was always supposed to be a fun, slightly mad girls trip. I’m very easy going and can be a bit of a wild one myself. So it’s not like I’m horrified that anyone was drunk or having sex or anything like that.

I‘m still a human being who requires sleep though!

Probably a bit of both. I’m very much just an optimist and as long as no one was intentionally vindictive and no one was hurt in any way, I still feel fortunate to be here, fortunate to have what the PP called ‘fuck it money’ and no incentive that I can see, for being angry (either inwardly or outwardly), when I can just make the best of it.