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Original poster

To not applaud Emma Willis for putting her children through hell?

207 replies

Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 21:19

I don't understand how these people can be absolutely celebrated for putting their own children through something so awful.

Does anyone else understand where I'm coming from?

I have always put my child first and I don't get the adoration they're getting?

I left someone who was addicted in order to put my child first.

OP posts:
HadleyVaughn · 19/05/2023 22:00

I agree with you OP.

I don't understand why she married him in the first place given that it was evident he had a problem.

There are literally billions of men in the world. She seems kind, beautiful interesting. She could have had had a stable and happy family life with a normal person without an addiction.

I don't get why she married him at all and I agree with you.

All this crap about "Why would you not support someone you love through an addiction through?" - because sacrificing your own mental health and that of your children on the altar of someone else's problem is utter madness. Drug addiction is an addiction and an illness I accet but choosing to start to take illegal drugs is a choice. It's not like in sickness and in health random accident or terminal illness. You yourself voluntarily take the first steps on that road knowing where the road leads.

You get one life and that life is short, and there are plently of people you can love who will love you too.

Personally, just my opinion, I think she is pathetic for choosing that life in the first place and then choosing to stay in it. You only had to look at the state of her when she was talking about it.

It's one thing if she was a penniless mother with no other options but she has and had money and choices.

WellitsNotideal · 19/05/2023 22:01

I’m sure they’ve both tried their best to protect their children and of course having the finances to buy in support and help will have been a big part in reducing or eliminating the impact on their children. I thought they seemed really lovely

Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:03

saraclara · 19/05/2023 21:56

I didn't see the whole programme, but what I did see was the beginning when he said that he was clean for eight years, from when he became a father. So when he did fall off the wagon, presumably she felt that he could be brought back again. He then went into rehab relatively promptly, didn't he? And it worked?

Those few months when he was doing drugs again must have been tough, but most people don't make decisions to leave their partners as quickly as all that, especially if they believe that they can come back from it.

But like I say, I didn't see the whole thing.

His youngest was 6 months old at ibis last relapse and he has a 14yr old, a 10yr old and a 6yr old.

Women should not be applauded for this nonsense

"A really good presenter but more importantly …… Emma Willis is clearly a wonderful person,"

"Emma Willis is a remarkable woman not many women would have stayed in her situation."

Not should they. Ever

OP posts:
FlowerTink · 19/05/2023 22:03

I was a huge fan of Busted as a teenager (30's now), even saw Matt when he went solo. And one of the things that hit hard too was when they both spoke about how much he'd gaslighted her. I've been there and that alone is a lot to deal with, even before you think of the impact on any children.

As a side I was also surprised that Charlie's rider was so many bottles of wine considering Matt's ongoing struggles.

Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:05

LizzieSiddal · 19/05/2023 21:58

As someone who had an alcoholic mother, I do agree with you @Royalbloo

I felt so sorry for Matt but the children have to come first.

This is exactly what I mean.

As much as you can love anyone else, I truly believe that once you have children you have a responsibility to them and their welfare which is way above your own. And I just don't feel that's been reflected in this at all.

OP posts:
ghostyslovesheets · 19/05/2023 22:06

Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 21:52

If she was living in a council flat and the show business industry hadn't covered up for him, this would have been a case for social services.

Not necessarily - she is a good protective factor, he's had ONE relapse since the first child was born and sought HELP - has since been clean

I work with kids where DV, drug use and mental health issues are a daily occurrence - but sometimes it's still not enough to get legal backing to remove children - Emma Willis has safeguarded her children - she has cared for them, loved them and been a solid adult in their lives - no reason to remove them.

I think it's very brave of both of them to open themselves up to such criticism and scrutiny in order to shed light on the issue of addiction - so many 'celebs' deny their issues - they are being open and honest - and at no point do I think those kids where at risk

Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:07

goldrushed

Anyone who has a phone can ring womens aid

OP posts:
Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:07

HadleyVaughn · 19/05/2023 22:00

I agree with you OP.

I don't understand why she married him in the first place given that it was evident he had a problem.

There are literally billions of men in the world. She seems kind, beautiful interesting. She could have had had a stable and happy family life with a normal person without an addiction.

I don't get why she married him at all and I agree with you.

All this crap about "Why would you not support someone you love through an addiction through?" - because sacrificing your own mental health and that of your children on the altar of someone else's problem is utter madness. Drug addiction is an addiction and an illness I accet but choosing to start to take illegal drugs is a choice. It's not like in sickness and in health random accident or terminal illness. You yourself voluntarily take the first steps on that road knowing where the road leads.

You get one life and that life is short, and there are plently of people you can love who will love you too.

Personally, just my opinion, I think she is pathetic for choosing that life in the first place and then choosing to stay in it. You only had to look at the state of her when she was talking about it.

It's one thing if she was a penniless mother with no other options but she has and had money and choices.

OMG thank you!!!!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:08

WellitsNotideal · 19/05/2023 22:01

I’m sure they’ve both tried their best to protect their children and of course having the finances to buy in support and help will have been a big part in reducing or eliminating the impact on their children. I thought they seemed really lovely

A really lovely drug addicted - babysitting, anyone? No, I thought not.

OP posts:
TomatoSandwiches · 19/05/2023 22:09

I'm not a fan of either, both incredibly overrated almost to the point of disbelief.
Her children were marred before they were born when she decided to procreate with an addict imo so I'm not surprised at the rest of her poor personal life choices.

Goldrushed · 19/05/2023 22:09

Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:07

goldrushed

Anyone who has a phone can ring womens aid

It's really not that easy. I think you need to cut back on the judgment, it's not a good look.

Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:12

goldrushed you may have a point if I hadn't been there myself as a single parent, with no support who then completed a masters and has now purchased my own house for me any my daughter.

I was working part time in a low paid job and called womens aid and CHOSE to put my child first in everything I did.

I still do.

OP posts:
Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:13

At one point we had a social worker because of his behaviour - they should have too but they were behind big gates with staff and cronies covering up what he was doing.

It's not admirable. It's terrible.

OP posts:
ghostyslovesheets · 19/05/2023 22:13

Goldrushed · 19/05/2023 22:09

It's really not that easy. I think you need to cut back on the judgment, it's not a good look.

Show quote history

12 times - that's the average number of times it takes before a woman actually leaves - an abusive man - he was a drug user - was he abusive? - I haven;t watched the program - but to say stupid throw away comments like this - blaming HER is just a shitty thing to do.

Goldrushed · 19/05/2023 22:14

Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:12

goldrushed you may have a point if I hadn't been there myself as a single parent, with no support who then completed a masters and has now purchased my own house for me any my daughter.

I was working part time in a low paid job and called womens aid and CHOSE to put my child first in everything I did.

I still do.

That's great and you should be really proud of yourself.

That doesn't mean you should be attacking those that haven't been able to do the same. It's damaging and toxic.

I've worked with hundreds of women in similar situations so believe me this is not coming from a place of ignorance or making excuses for people.

Grapewrath · 19/05/2023 22:15

I was surprised she married him straight out of rehab.
I think rich people manage addiction differently to us- they have access to more childcare, better detoxes/rehabilitation and a second home for the recovering parent to go to.
The children are most likely safeguarded due to these extra factors as well as one consistent and protective parent. Emma is also likely to have far more resilience than a council estate Mum as she has access to much better resources and therefore the family is less impacted. Not fair, but that’s life.
I felt very sad for her tbh, she is clearly besotted with him and seems quite a pathetic figure

MayBeeJuneSoon · 19/05/2023 22:17

This reply has been deleted

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SemperIdem · 19/05/2023 22:18

Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:12

goldrushed you may have a point if I hadn't been there myself as a single parent, with no support who then completed a masters and has now purchased my own house for me any my daughter.

I was working part time in a low paid job and called womens aid and CHOSE to put my child first in everything I did.

I still do.

I think it’s really sad that you have so little empathy or understanding that not everyone is able to achieve what you have.

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 19/05/2023 22:19

She is a deluded and foolish woman if she actually thinks he will stay drink and drug free for the rest of his life.

My dad was an alcoholic for most of his life and gave it up during his third marriage for 15 years but then when there were difficulties started drinking when he got divorced. Cost him 3 marriages in total but I’m not sure if he drunk in the first one. Luckily my mum divorced him when we were young.

Original poster
Royalbloo · 19/05/2023 22:19

maybeejubesoon

He wasn't when I married him - she was about 2.5yrs when his actions and behaviour became intolerable and so I made a choice for my daughter. She was getting upset and increasingly agitated and it was the right thing to do.

OP posts:
DarrellRiversCriminalBehaviourOrder · 19/05/2023 22:20

He's got the addiction issues, and you're going after her?

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 19/05/2023 22:21

Grapewrath · 19/05/2023 22:15

I was surprised she married him straight out of rehab.
I think rich people manage addiction differently to us- they have access to more childcare, better detoxes/rehabilitation and a second home for the recovering parent to go to.
The children are most likely safeguarded due to these extra factors as well as one consistent and protective parent. Emma is also likely to have far more resilience than a council estate Mum as she has access to much better resources and therefore the family is less impacted. Not fair, but that’s life.
I felt very sad for her tbh, she is clearly besotted with him and seems quite a pathetic figure

She probably had saving tendencies in her relationships. Where most of us would be wary she’d want to save him. More fool her.

ghostyslovesheets · 19/05/2023 22:21

Ditto @Goldrushed - I see the impact of drug misuse and abuse daily - blaming the woman/mother is not helpful or fair

Making comments like 'if she lived on a council estate' 'cronies' covering up is just not helpful or real! I have parents from across the spectrum - council estates to kids in private school - all of whom have been involved in SS and had children removed .

I do not think this family would have met the threshold for removal due to her care of the children

But this idea that SS pick and chose who they work with based on income is odd, untrue and damaging.

Please indicate at what point their children where harmed, abused or saw abuse?

Honestly - it makes me roll my eyes when people post from a point of 'nice middle class family' - outraged at something - with no idea of the lives thousands of people live that would make then run in horror - SS have way more to deal with - and people live lives that 'you' (OP) would be massively disturbed by - while keeping their kids - and actually doing a half decent job

MrsJBaptiste · 19/05/2023 22:21

SilentParrot · 19/05/2023 21:49

There's a long thread in Telly Addicts on this. Lots of people agree with you.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/telly_addicts/4808296-matt-willis-facing-addiction

I waw just coming on to say the comments on the other thread were very different to those here, OP. I can't decide which side of the fence I'm on...

monicaandchandler · 19/05/2023 22:21

If she's so awful for staying with a drug addict, why did you have a child with a drug addict?