To ask if you have ever felt an instant mutual sexual attraction to someone?

[Margot78]

Just wondering if people really experience this or whether it’s just in movies! I’m mid forties now so probably too late for me but just curious as to whether it does really happen!

Yes!

my ex-husband & the one that got away.(childhood sweetheart)

it’s hard to find someone else when you’ve had 2 bolts of lightning like that. (I’ve looked 6+ years nothing close to that yet) both times a love at first sight look. Would give a lot to fee that one more time in this life. But feels a bit greedy.

Yes and the sex was amazing. It was just a fling, he wasn't even that attractive but just an instant chemistry and even if I were to meet him now many years on I wouldn't trust myself 🤪

Yes, once when I was doing a summer internship away from home, working with someone completely inappropriate. He was an absolute charming shit of a person, dead now but will never forget him, nearly every memory is NSFW.

Yes. I was 51 at the time. Reader, I married him.

Yes
He was my senior at work … older charismatic .
I married him in a whirl wind.
Turned out he was bat shit crazy narcissist though with a really emotionally abusive streak so only lasted a year.
Still physically yearned for him but my mind realised he was awful.
He emigrated and I didn’t move with him.

Oh yes. Very much so. It's a wonderful, addictive feeling.

Yes. More than once. It is an incredible feeling.

I don't think it will happen for me again though. I feel like I've used up my quota!

Yes, twice. There was huge sexual tension and mutual attraction between me and my ex boyfriend’s best friend, which obviously we didn’t act on. After me and ex split up we told each other how we felt and I couldn’t believe someone so gorgeous, intelligent and sexy fancied me. We didn’t act on it out of respect for the ex, which I don’t regret. We would have had some fantastic sex for a few weeks, I’m sure, but he wasn’t long term boyfriend material, and I knew he had the potential to break my heart into tiny pieces.

The second time was with now DH!

Yes, my DH.
I saw his photo on POF and was instantly drawn to him, met in person and it was love at first sight - sparks flying. we’ve been together 12 years now and have 2 kids and the sparks are still alive, I get goosebumps just thinking about him.

with my ex, over 20 years ago, I fell in love with him very quickly as a person but there was no sexual connection. I absolutely adored him and we were together for 3 years, but our sex life was terrible.

Oh yes, my XH. We were both in other relationships and stayed part of a wider friendship group for years. But when we both became single, we pounced on each other straight away.

He did turn out to be a massive turd and in hindsight I can see the chemistry blinded me to a lot of that until I was in too deep.

Yes when I was younger a few times and it always led to great sex but no serious relationships, not with my ex dp who I was with for 16 years but felt it once with someone I met while I was with dp, proper take your breath away chemistry. I’m single now and at 37 would love to feel it again one day and be able to act on it if I’m not too past it!

Oh, yes.

God yes!!!

Many, many, many times!

And it feels amazing!

yes - it ended very messily but I can't say I regret it, the chemistry between us was ridiculous!

Crikey, yes! Lots and lots of times . Haven't always acted on it - and there are a couple I regret not following through, just for the experience which I'm sure would've been spectacular. Hormones often lie, but not about the things that matter most to them 😉

I did marry one. It was an idiotic mistake for both of us, but the sexual chemistry continued yelling "YES!" long after all reason declared "NO".

To end up in a long, secure and balanced relationship with your chemical match must be utterly wonderful. Never happened for me, though.

Not quite, but on one occasion I fancied someone I’d just met, and when we hooked up a few hours later, the chemistry was amazing. Sadly, he turned out to be a twat.

The trouble is that now I’ve experienced that kind of spark, I don’t think I could be happy with a connection that’s so-so/nice but unexciting. It’s weird that chemistry doesn’t necessary correlate with how good-looking you think someone is.

Agree! My last instant attraction was a total disaster.

Yes absolutely. Someone who was completely unsuitable but omg it was electric. We were never a couple. But had relations on and off for over 10 years. It ended very badly at the end and I haven't seen him in over 10 years now. The connection was unreal. I felt like we really were connected in a way I've never felt with anyone else. It was electric.
Part of me wonders if I saw him now if that would come back all over again. But it's very deep down. Because he betrayed me and I don't forget. The past is best left there

Yup. Saw him sitting in his car while I was doing the same, waiting to go into a building to start a course. Something just slotted into place.

That was 16 years ago. We’ve been together over a decade, married for four.

It was a long road 😀

Yes first with someone at school and it’s never gone. But we are both happily long term married to different people now, so on the rare occasions we encounter one another, we smile and silently remember those school discos and sixth form parties with affection, and swiftly move on.

Second with someone completely inappropriate and much older. He was free single and divorced btw - not inappropriate in that way - inappropriate in that it would never have worked because he was a bit of a player in a very gentlemanly and raffishly humorous way if that’s possible and I didn’t entirely trust him. It was electric while it lasted though! Oh and he looked devine in his uniform 😃. He was like some particularly potent form of an addictive drug and it took
several attempts to wean myself off him!

Yes, with my now husband. Instant attraction and thought we’d get married. He also thought the same (only found out later as didn’t say this to each other when we first met!)

Maybe I'm naive but I kinda thought most people had. It's happened more than once but the biggie was as a mature woman nor a young girl.
I worked alongside him my 30s and recall one day just leaning forward and touching his shoulder. I literally was drawn to him. I was quite embarrassed....we went our separate ways then years and years later I met him again. He's got podgy with glasses and I've gone a bit grey with a mum tum...but it was exactly the same...worse!

So yes, it definitely exists. It was sexual but that wasnt the u derlying atteaction. I mean we were both weathered middle aged people in work clothes. I just wanted to touch him.

I hope you get to experience it too

Yip had a frigging amazing ONS with a guy I met at a party, sounds tacky af but it was abs brill, it was what it was nothing more and I love thinking about it now and again, so passionate. what a secret pleasure never told a soul about it and zero regrets.

Yes twice (like a punch in the stomach the second I met them). They happened about twelve years apart but neither came to anything and the long relationships I have had weren’t instant attractions. I can look back fondly on those two experiences now but they were too fraught for me at the time as the attraction was too intense.

Christ, yes. Someone I worked with in my first professional job. It was incredible, definitely not a relationship and would never have worked, but a messy, passionate entanglement where we could hardly keep our hands off each other. Started the very first time we laid eyes on each other, and was entirely mutual. Have seen him a number of times since I moved away and it’s still there, nearly 30 years on. However I’ve been happily married to the most wonderful man for the past 20 of those years, so would never do anything about it now. Still turn to water when he looks at me sideways and smiles, though.