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To ask for a handhold? Worrying news about unborn baby at 31 weeks

498 replies

ladydorito · 17/04/2023 08:31

Hi everyone, I'm posting here for traffic, I'm really sorry.

Yesterday I had what I thought was a "routine" growth scan following a period of changed movements at 30+6 weeks. The "good" news is that baby has moved into breech which explains the change in movements.

The bad news is, having had their femur length measure short but not worryingly so throughout pregnancy, baby's femur is now on the first percentile. This, coupled with a large head measurement (on the 92nd percentile) has resulted in a referral to fetal medicine. The specialist can't see us until Wednesday and I just have no idea how to get through the next 48 hours.

The team at our hospital were lovely yesterday. I spoke to a registrar who went through what the various causes of this could be. I'm short (5"2) with particularly short legs (although I wouldn't say 99 percent of people have longer..
) and was born two weeks late weighing only 6lbs so there's a decent chance I'm simply carrying a short baby like me.

But we've also been told this could be a soft marker for undiagnosed Downs or one of the other trisomys. The idea of getting this far in pregnancy and having that missed makes me feel sick. We could cope with a baby with Downs, it isn't what any mum would hope for but they will be showered with love always. But the idea of the baby having one of the non life compatible trisomys has worried me to the point I've been throwing up this morning.

Skeletal dysplasia has also been mentioned - I thought this just meant what I understand as dwarfism, which DH and I would be totally fine with, it would obviously be an adjustment but not life limiting or even massively life changing from what I have read. But now I've fallen down the rabbit hole and am reading about other dysplasias that are incompatible with life and again, the idea of bringing a child to term who will not survive is just beyond unbearable.

I can feel little one kicking me as I type and I feel like I've failed them so much for even thinking about the worst case scenarios. This is our much longed for first baby and after a terrible first trimester with a hematoma that just bled and bled, we really thought we were at the point we could enjoy pregnancy.

In a twist so cruel it's almost funny, all our nursery furniture is due to arrive from Mamas and Papas this morning.

I'm so sorry about how long this is but I think I'm just asking for a handhold or even advice from anyone who has been through similar.

Thank you so much. X

OP posts:
UnionRep · 15/06/2023 10:53

Fabulous news! Both enjoy your new daughter x

user1471538283 · 15/06/2023 12:09

Oh my I am so sorry. Of course you are worried sick.

Despite scans the hospital wouldn't believe I was overdue by 3 weeks. I had one final scan and it said that the baby was so big I would probably need a C section. So that set me off!

My DS was quite big (but not huge at just under 8lbs) and I am small and he was born naturally. But I think the scans whilst brilliant can only tell so much and sometimes are not right.

I am wishing you all so much love x

AndDoTheTangoInTheNightTAAAAAANGOOO · 15/06/2023 12:11

Massive congratulations on your beautiful girl, I love the names 😍 X

user1471538283 · 15/06/2023 12:11

Oh I am so sorry I missed your update in my haste to try and comfort you!

She is just perfect! Lovely little Edie! Wonderful news!

tattygrl · 15/06/2023 12:15

Wonderful news! Congratulations! She is absolutely beautiful. Well done for getting through this stressful and worrying time.

Spidey66 · 15/06/2023 12:26
I Love You Smile GIF by corgiyolk

Aww what a great update. She’s a little cutie pie and I love her name. Congratulations!

ArabeIIaScott · 15/06/2023 12:48

🤗Congratulations, OP, she's absolutely beautiful!

HamstersAreMyLife · 15/06/2023 12:58

Fab news many congratulations

hohumpigsbum · 15/06/2023 13:05

Just wanted to add my congratulations
What a lovely, lovely update and really made me smile (and maybe get a little lump in my throat)
She's absolutely beautiful, wishing you all the happy adventures together :)

Oaktree55 · 15/06/2023 13:16

Just an idea would it help if you can afford to book in for a private scan? That way you’ll get measurements double checked and you’ll know something before waiting? There are many private scanning clinics.

betweenfor · 15/06/2023 13:26

What a wonderful update. Congratulations on your beautiful baby OP.

FayCarew · 15/06/2023 13:40

Congratulations on your beautiful baby!
Flowers 👶Flowers

Honeylemonandginger · 15/06/2023 14:38

A huge congratulations.
she is beautiful.💗

mommybear1 · 15/06/2023 15:03

She is gorgeous hope you are both doing well and enjoying your time together- congratulations 🥳

kidsandpuppies · 15/06/2023 15:10

She's beautiful, congratulations! 💖

GoodbyeKyle · 15/06/2023 15:27

Beautiful 🩷 congratulations 🎊

raincamepouringdown · 15/06/2023 16:13

She's beautiful! Congratulations!

FloofCloud · 15/06/2023 18:32

Aaahhhh congratulations 🥳

Trysbutfails · 15/06/2023 18:43

Lovely news.

99 times out of 100 the ‘scares’ during pregnancy are just an abundance of caution! Horrible to go through though.

aurynne · 20/06/2023 04:05

She is just delicious! Thanks so much for letting us know, I hope you recover quickly and can spend many, many days staring at her in wonder and sniffing her little head.

twoandcooplease · 20/06/2023 14:40

Congratulations OP that is wonderful news she is beautiful 😍 !!!

CaptainJackSparrow85 · 20/06/2023 15:39

She’s gorgeous! Congratulations!

aurynne · 20/06/2023 23:38

Am I the only one who looks at her beautiful tiny face and thinks she is thinking: "Well here am I, what was all the fuss about?" Grin

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