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To ask for a handhold? Worrying news about unborn baby at 31 weeks

498 replies

ladydorito · 17/04/2023 08:31

Hi everyone, I'm posting here for traffic, I'm really sorry.

Yesterday I had what I thought was a "routine" growth scan following a period of changed movements at 30+6 weeks. The "good" news is that baby has moved into breech which explains the change in movements.

The bad news is, having had their femur length measure short but not worryingly so throughout pregnancy, baby's femur is now on the first percentile. This, coupled with a large head measurement (on the 92nd percentile) has resulted in a referral to fetal medicine. The specialist can't see us until Wednesday and I just have no idea how to get through the next 48 hours.

The team at our hospital were lovely yesterday. I spoke to a registrar who went through what the various causes of this could be. I'm short (5"2) with particularly short legs (although I wouldn't say 99 percent of people have longer..
) and was born two weeks late weighing only 6lbs so there's a decent chance I'm simply carrying a short baby like me.

But we've also been told this could be a soft marker for undiagnosed Downs or one of the other trisomys. The idea of getting this far in pregnancy and having that missed makes me feel sick. We could cope with a baby with Downs, it isn't what any mum would hope for but they will be showered with love always. But the idea of the baby having one of the non life compatible trisomys has worried me to the point I've been throwing up this morning.

Skeletal dysplasia has also been mentioned - I thought this just meant what I understand as dwarfism, which DH and I would be totally fine with, it would obviously be an adjustment but not life limiting or even massively life changing from what I have read. But now I've fallen down the rabbit hole and am reading about other dysplasias that are incompatible with life and again, the idea of bringing a child to term who will not survive is just beyond unbearable.

I can feel little one kicking me as I type and I feel like I've failed them so much for even thinking about the worst case scenarios. This is our much longed for first baby and after a terrible first trimester with a hematoma that just bled and bled, we really thought we were at the point we could enjoy pregnancy.

In a twist so cruel it's almost funny, all our nursery furniture is due to arrive from Mamas and Papas this morning.

I'm so sorry about how long this is but I think I'm just asking for a handhold or even advice from anyone who has been through similar.

Thank you so much. X

OP posts:
Remagirl · 14/06/2023 23:38

No advice but shared experience that might help. We had lots of stress during pregnancy. Loads of red flags around slightly high markers for Downs, lack of amniotic fluid, diagnosed with talipes at 20 weeks then told this could be an indicator for Edwards syndrome and lots of other problems. Our son was born healthy with one foot affected by talipes which was quickly corrected. Even at a day old the hospital were keen to spot problems. There weren't any. I wish I'd been able to shut all of this out because I really didn't enjoy my pregnancy as much as I should have as I worried constantly. I hope it's the same for you x

JennyJenny8675309 · 14/06/2023 23:39

I can't express how wonderful it is to go from holding my breath reading through the first post to seeing your update minutes later.

I felt this too. What a perfect ending to a worrisome thread. Congratulations! She is lovely

MrsPerfect12 · 14/06/2023 23:40

So happy for you!! Congratulations 🎉

Im99912 · 14/06/2023 23:40

Oh how fabulous
Congratulations to all of you especially baby Edie

Malbecmoron · 14/06/2023 23:42

Congratulations she is gorgeous! So happy for you xxx

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 14/06/2023 23:42

God, what a relief. You must be in Nirvana. She's a really lovely baby, too. Congratulations.

Oopsadaisysgranny · 14/06/2023 23:43

The she’s beautiful and perfect congratulations x

TooOldForThisNonsense · 14/06/2023 23:43

What a lovely baby, congratulations and enjoy x

Clarich007 · 14/06/2023 23:47

Congratulations, she is absolutely beautiful. So pleased she is ok. What a worry for you at the time.Your attitude was lovely, as in you would love her whatever happened. I hope you have a lovely happy time 💐💕🎊

Rockmehardplace · 14/06/2023 23:47

Aww welcome Edie!

thisisasurvivor · 14/06/2023 23:47

This is the most perfect loveliest news op

I'm so sorry you had a hard time previously

What a wee perfect angel xxxxxx

Hidinginaonesie · 14/06/2023 23:51

Little poppet! Congratulations.
ps 6lb4oz is not that small so she might well not even be petite like you. My dd was born 5lb 13oz at 39 weeks and is now 16 yrs and 5’5”

spiderlight · 14/06/2023 23:51

Hello Edie! Congratulations - she's absolutely gorgeous!

Fairyjuice · 14/06/2023 23:53

Oh op, sorry to hear about this. Not the same situation, but one of mine had an abnormal head measurement/shape at 32 weeks, it had been been flagged earlier but they said it wasn't a concern unless it kept growing, which it did. Had a consultant scan in the end and they said it didn't look too troubling, and the baby was born fine, though he did have the same weird shaped head as my DH.

Fingers crossed for you and your little one 🤞

Lifeomars · 14/06/2023 23:54

What a beautiful little girl and she has a lovely name.

Edders71 · 14/06/2023 23:55

Oh she’s a little beauty, massive congratulations to you both xxx

Joystir59 · 15/06/2023 00:00

She's absolutely gorgeous, congratulations OP

Beyondbaffled · 15/06/2023 00:12

Your daughter is beautiful OP, congratulations! I too stumbled across your post today and felt compelled to add to the chorus of congratulatory messages because I too have an Edith / Edie. May she have the firecracker personality of her many namesakes and bring joy to your lives!

viques · 15/06/2023 00:32

Welcome to this wonderful world little girl. Try not to give your poor parents any more scary moments, not for a few years anyhow!

RegimentalSturgeon · 15/06/2023 00:39

Congratulations. Wishing Edie and both of you you health and happiness. Flowers

Hiddencomic · 15/06/2023 00:40

What a cutie! Congrats 🎉

oakleaffy · 15/06/2023 00:58

@ladydorito What a beautiful baby!
What a relief for you..
I love her quizzical expression 🙂So sweet!

MuchuseasaChocolateTeapot · 15/06/2023 01:04

Here for a handhold OP X

Floralnomad · 15/06/2023 01:06

Congratulations @ladydorito 💐

whatausername · 15/06/2023 01:31

What a wonderful update, thank you for taking the time to come back and share photos!

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