Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who invites one half of a couple to a wedding??

550 replies

username98765 · 31/03/2023 09:51

Please tell me if I am being unreasonable. My dp of 9 years has received a wedding invite today just addressed to him! The bride and groom I have known for years. The groom used to go out with my cousin but it ended with him cheating on her. That's the only reason I can think of not to be invited. I would never imagine inviting one part of a couple to a wedding! Haven't had chance to speak with my dp as he has already left for work when I'd seen it.

OP posts:
mamnotmum · 31/03/2023 09:55

My husband was invited to his school friends wedding. I was not. I also thought it very odd but reasoned that they'd maybe each have a 'school friends' table and the list had to end somewhere?

OnOldOlympus · 31/03/2023 09:55

🤷🏻‍♀️ Weddings are expensive and they don’t owe you an invitation.

Lcb123 · 31/03/2023 09:55

Their wedding, their choice.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 31/03/2023 09:56

Yes YABU.
It’s their wedding. They get to choose who goes.

Clymene · 31/03/2023 09:56

People have no manners.

luckystarg · 31/03/2023 09:58

YANBU. I hate this. If you can’t afford to have both at the wedding, don’t invite just one. At the end of the day it is their choice but I would be outraged if DH even considered going without me (unless I didn’t know the person or something, or maybe when Covid number rules were in play)

It has happened to us before and DH said he won’t go. An invite magically appeared for me.

Bintymcbintface · 31/03/2023 09:58

You're not owed an invite

Keepthetowel · 31/03/2023 09:58

I’m going to a wedding, my DH hasn’t been invited, only partners have been invited if they are friends of the groom and the bride. I’m v happy with the situation as my DH wouldn’t know anyone if he went.

BarbaraWoodlouse · 31/03/2023 09:58

I’ve been invited to several weddings without DH. This has been where I have a relationship with the bride or groom but he doesn’t (school friends/work friends etc). As said above, weddings are expensive and not everyone can afford to double the cost of their “friends table” by including OHs who don’t know them or each other.

StreamingCervix · 31/03/2023 09:58

You say dp, are you married?

I can recall a celebrity wedding trend that’s started, that basically says that unmarried couples wouldn’t be seen as a ‘unit’ so may not receive a double invite automatically. It’s a bit confusing though as obviously they didn’t consider that pre their own wedding day, they would have been an ‘unmarried couple’

MatildaTheCat · 31/03/2023 09:59

It’s very rude. I doubt my DH would ever go alone.

Keepthetowel · 31/03/2023 09:59

No ring, no bring is a very old custom

Winemygoodenemy · 31/03/2023 09:59

I have been invited to a wedding without DP. He doesn’t know them as they are a close work friend. Only to say hi. Friend is having a small wedding so cost. Other work friend is single, so we are each others plus ones.

DP not bothered as he doesn’t know them. Quite happy to not go and be my taxi.

Coffeellama · 31/03/2023 10:00

You aren’t joined at the hip because you are a couple, it’s totally acceptable to still treat people as individuals! But I can agree it’s hurtful.

Mypatioisminging · 31/03/2023 10:00

do you get on well with them?

the only thing I can think is limited places and you’re not close to them.

NameChange60000 · 31/03/2023 10:00

In what capacity do you know them? Are you friends with them? Do you go out with them as friends? Does your DP? You'll get 99% people on here agreeing with you, MN don't like only 1 half invited to a wedding. I'd never do it myself, but I've been on the receiving end of both me and my DH receiving a single invite like this. People obviously do it because of numbers/costs and so on. So in some cases only their friends are invited rather than friends and partners, colleagues rather than colleagues and partners. It wouldnt stop me going to the wedding.

PS why did you open his post without asking 🤣

Polis · 31/03/2023 10:01

I’m v happy with the situation as my DH wouldn’t know anyone if he went.

Presumably, he would know more people after he went.

Rapapampam · 31/03/2023 10:01

People who say it’s their wedding their choice, probably have never been snubbed in this way before.
It is rude and demonstrates a lack of manners. No wonder OP is confused. Decent people don’t do this. It would never occur to me to invite a person and not their other half.

Mypatioisminging · 31/03/2023 10:02

Agree, the words “I’ve known them for years” is very different to “I’m good friends with them and we socialise often”

to be fair you’re not entitled to an invite to their wedding/

SharonKaren · 31/03/2023 10:02

Very rude. Better not to invite both. Your dp or you should ask whether there an error in printing

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 31/03/2023 10:02

How do you and your DH know them both? Do you ever see them socially?

Mypatioisminging · 31/03/2023 10:02

Rapapampam · 31/03/2023 10:01

People who say it’s their wedding their choice, probably have never been snubbed in this way before.
It is rude and demonstrates a lack of manners. No wonder OP is confused. Decent people don’t do this. It would never occur to me to invite a person and not their other half.

Watch our everyone, loads a money has arrived 😂

NameChange60000 · 31/03/2023 10:03

SharonKaren · 31/03/2023 10:02

Very rude. Better not to invite both. Your dp or you should ask whether there an error in printing

Imagine the embarrassment of doing this!

Ratataty · 31/03/2023 10:03

My husband's cousin has just invited him and my eldest child to his wedding. We've been married 22 years and have 3 adult/teenage kids. Do I care? No, they're a lovely couple, known him since he was a kid but it's their celebration, their money, I'm happy for them. I think you need to give your head a wobble.

SeasonFinale · 31/03/2023 10:04

I think if I were to need to do this then I would at least have had a conversation with the friends beforehand so it wasn't a shock when the invitation arrived.