Getting married on my first anniversary

[Savingforahome]

I got married to my husband last year after many years together and a year after a major health scare which made us realise how special life is.
A close family member who was involved in my wedding announced her engagement before my wedding and I couldn't have been happier for her, she's wanted this for so long I am honestly thrilled and he is perfect for her. They went to view her perfect venue and I heard all about it, and then found out that they booked it the same date I had my wedding but the following year. So this will be on our one year anniversary. Now if it was the second year, third whatever it wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest. But to say I was hurt is an understatement. I want to spend my first anniversary with my husband. Now to make it even more awkward she asked me to be bridesmaid, and we are close family where I have to go. So I will spend half of the day no where near my husband as I will be with her.

Husband kicked off and hasn't spoken about it in months. Everyone else is acting like it isn't a big deal. It just feels like no one has thought about my feelings at all.

AIBU?

Just to clarify we will be going to the wedding, I will be bridesmaid but we will be leaving after the dinner (I have been open and honest with the bride although I think she was upset, but she understood)

I’d have thought being at a wedding would be a lovely way to celebrate your anniversary.

You've been with your husband for years, you aren't traditional newlyweds

YABVU and rude to leave the wedding after dinner.

Celebrate a different day.

you’re going to ruin your friendship

this is a reverse isnt it?

I don’t see the problem. You are being precious.

YABVVVVU

You are entitled to feel however you want to, but I think you're both being ridiculous and very immature. I would think being a part of a close relative's wedding would be a wonderful way to celebrate them and your one year anniversary. You can have a private celebration the day before, the next day, whatever.

YABU, sorry. Enjoy the wedding and have a nice hotel room for the night, exchange gifts and if you want to go out for dinner or something, do it the weekend before.

This is bizarre

come on op !!! Wierd way to behave - celebrate your anniversary another day (what do you mean your dh Kicked off?)

YABVU and really rude to leave after dinner. Youll have had dinner so what's so important that you need to run off to be together. Surely by the time dinners finished your BM duties will be over

Ask the band/dj to play your first dance song or something during the reception. buy a bottle of champagne or stay overnight at the venue or nearby & do something the next day.

I'd be really unimpressed and very let down if someone important enough to be my bridesmaid didn't think I or my wedding was special enough to them to stay for the whole event

Reverse?

This is a completely ridiculous imagined slight. The world doesn't revolve around you. Why do you feel hurt? How on earth can your husband be unspeakably angry?

Please never mention these feelings to the close family member whose wedding it is, and grow up from toddlerhood

Got to be reverse.

If it was a golden wedding anniversary I could see your point, but not a first!

I was MOH on our first wedding anniversary for my best friend, and then MOH again for my other best friend on my significant birthday. Both times was thrilled to be asked, had fab days, didn't think twice about it. I'm not sure why you're upset, YABVU. They wouldn't have been thinking about you when setting a date, why would they?

Yabvvvvvu and a bit
Ridiculous. In the nicest way possible, get over yourself. Your anniversary date is important to absolutely no one else but you.

I don't see an issue tbh. I think it's quite nice. Anniversaries aren't a big deal, your big day was last year.

nuts

This is absolutely bat shit crazy.

You've had your wedding. Nobody else has to put their plans on hold because you've reserved another day to be all about you. Get a grip.

Are you teasing us OP? This seems too silly. Or is this a reverse?

Oh dear.
I think you need to rethink this.

Utterly bonkers.

Reverse

At best

It’s a great way to spend your 1et anniversary - a big party someone else paid for and you get to go around reminding everyone who went to your wedding the lovely memories you had together. Do you seriously think they should plan their wedding around you? Precious much! It’s likely they did not have lots of choices for dates.