to be worried about the way someone else is bringing up their dc?

[tillytally]

I'm not sure if I should just butt out and forget it.

But i am worried about the dc of one of our employees.

They have 2 dc, one 2 1/2 the other only a few months old. I know they love the dc and in all other respects look after the kids well, they are clean well fed etc etc. They are young so have done things differantly to me, but nothing that jepordises the dc.

There is however one thing that really worries me. That is the fact that they both smoke a lot of cannabis. By a lot I mean most days. They are struggling financially which means the kids must go without some things to fund this, but more importantly those poor childrens health.

They live in a one bedroom flat so when they are smoking this they cannot be away from the fumes. In most cases there are others there smoking it as well.

What do i do AIBU and just butt out, or should I report this to someone? I am torn and dont know what to do.

I would hate someone interfearing with my life, but at the same time i wouldnt put my children in that environment.

"i think in the grand scheme of things,being taken away from your loving parents and placed into the care system would have far more of a detrimental effect on a child than inhaling 2nd hand weed smoke"

This is the key point here I think. Sounds like apart from this, they are ok parents and no hint of the abuse that totalmisfit had from her 'father'.

I can see both sides,but I do feel that anyone who even contemplates smoking weed in the same room when they don't need to do that(could go outside to smoke spliff, take turns so kids not left alone) is either uneducated or selfish.

Message withdrawn

What about parents who drink copious amounts of alchohol every night or feed their DC poor quality food so that they end up obese? Would you consider reporting those parents too?

IMHO, you should butt out. The children are loved and wanted which is more than can be said than if they ended up being shunted from foster parent to foster parent.

of course they are being selfish and inconsiderate but i think some education and guidance would be the way to go with that,reporting to SS is an extreme i would only consider if i had seen evidence that a child was being abused or neglected.

What Ruby said!!

Sorry for suddenly deserting this thread was to busy to get on here last night.

Please let me put something straight. I do not want the children removed from their parents. I was just concerned for their health.

I am also not trying to dictate to the parents what they can and cannot do. That is their choice. I just didnt feel it was right to inflict the smoke and potential health risks on to children, who cant choose for themseleves.

SS was a last resort, but having never dealt with them, I didnt want to make a call and then regret it, so asked advice.

it seems that ss will do very little anyhow, so I think i have decided to approach the subject again with the parents. I will do my best to be friendly and supportive and not lecture and condem them. I am being to think after reading this that it may just be down to naiveity and maybe a little laziness that they smoke it around the kids.

The youngest dc is only a few months and whether the drugs cause an effect the smoke certainly will do to the same degree cigerette smoke does. So I think that is the approach i will take. Almost override the fact is is drugs and illegal blah blah and concentrate on the smoke issue as they also are both heavy smokers around the dcs. Then i think I will just have to step back and leave it to them, but obviously be of any help I can if they need/ask for it.

Tilly i think you're doing the right thing. agree with everything you've said there.