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To not give up my Playmobil and cut cousins hands off if she tries to take it?

378 replies

Qantaqa · 19/03/2023 13:15

Ok Ok .. the last part is possibly U....

I have an extensive collection of playmobil which has been boxed up for many years. I briefly got it out 10 years ago when my DSs were 7/8ish but after a particularly traumatising incident where they broke some I boxed it all back up and put it away and never got it back out. I say this to show that my attachment to it is frankly ridiculous.

My cousins daughter is 6. She is in many ways an mini version of me at that age and I adore her and obviously indulge her and am silly with her in ways her parents can't be. I (obviously) have been buying her Playmobil for birthdays and Xmas which she loves. My collection came up in a discussion at a birthday meal recently and cousins daughter asked if she could come over and play. I said it was boxed away and that was it.

Except it isn't. Cousin has asked about "getting some sets for her DC since I aren't using it". I've politely said various versions of no with excuses, but this morning I had this message,

Hey Q. Any more thoughts over the Playmobile? DC is beside herself with excitement ay the thought of having some of yours! We are out for Mothers Day this afternoon but I'll give you a bell later. xx

Clearly I need a stronger "No over my dead body" response but having moaned mentioned this to DM at lunch she thinks IABU to not "pass it down".

DB thinks I should just go buy a box off Facebook and hand that over which I am considering.

So AIBU to want to keep my Playmobil?

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?


You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

MPY24 · 19/03/2023 14:00

I'd say no. Just because it's classed as a toy doesn't mean you need to give it to children. If you had an expensive old coin collection would you give it to her to play shops with? Or a stamp collection to use to put on fake letters? At the end of the day it's yours and you should not feel forced into letting people touch it or have it if you don't want to.


verylowbattery · 19/03/2023 14:00

'I know it is irrational but the Playmobil is mine and I don't even let my own kids play with it! 😂 Nothing you can say will change my mind. It's staying with me, sorry!'


starfishmummy · 19/03/2023 14:00

ConsuelaHammock · 19/03/2023 13:41

Please don’t feel pressured to give anything you treasure away m. I’d reply with a ‘ hi there , I really would prefer to keep my play mobile, I’m sure dn will enjoy collecting her own sets over the years. Have a lovely Mother’s Day !

Nope. "I really would prefer...." is far too wishy washy and will make CF think there is a possibility that the OP will change her mind

Needs to be much more assertive.


viques · 19/03/2023 14:00

Tygertiger · 19/03/2023 13:28

YANBU and I am also similarly precious about Playmobil and Sylvanian Families. Could she play with them with you as a compromise? I can cope with that if I am there to police the handling of the items 😆

Talking of sylvanian families, did you see that lovely picture of the ( omg I would) Bill Nighy at the Oscars? He had one of his Granddaughters sylvanian family characters in his pocket because he didn’t want to leave it alone in the hotel room, and he got it out for a photo. So sweet.


ElegantlyTouched · 19/03/2023 14:01

Dear Cousin,

No need for further thoughts, as I said the Playmobil is staying in the loft until I have room to display it. Good luck in dealing with dd's disappointment that you have unnecessarily caused.


bizzywiththefizzy · 19/03/2023 14:01

God no keep it . I still have my sons gigantic box of lego which will probably go to any grandkids I have . These toys are timeless and expensive to buy . You don't just give them away willy nilly . Your cousin will just have to fork out for her own collection .


caringcarer · 19/03/2023 14:01

Sorry cousins but I have irrational attachment to it and don't share it. I did not even let my own children play with it. You can get sets on eBay for your dd.


anexcellentwoman · 19/03/2023 14:02

My older friend is like that with her jewellery. Her nieces have been on at her to share some choice pieces. She has just had the wonderful surprise of a granddaughter from her 48 year old son and his wife. One of her first responses to the news was that she now had somebody with whom to leave her jewellery.
She had saved all her son's Lego sets and will now be able to hand them over.
Grandchildren can come round quicker than you think. It is a thing of wonder to hand on your children's toys to their children.


caringcarer · 19/03/2023 14:03

I must admit my ds had an enormous Lego zoo an we also bought him loads of extra animals. When my sister wanted to borrow it for my niece I said no because they have a dog that loves to chew things. I just said I was keeping it for son if he ever had his own kids so not mine to loan out.


WilsonMilson · 19/03/2023 14:04

Look, it may be weird as fuck, but each to their own and you’re allowed to have precious possessions that you don’t want to give away. Grant yourself permission to say no, if they push it then they are cfs!


Laiste · 19/03/2023 14:04


Just repeat versions of what you've said already:

''No, really, even my kids aren't allowed to have it!''
''Ha ha - you know what i'm like! It's still no''
''No - i'm still too attached, sorry''

or shut it down.

''No. Please don't keep on asking. It's starting to make me uncomfortable/upset/picked on/bullied ... '' (what ever word works for you).


ExtraOnions · 19/03/2023 14:05

I find it a bit odd that you are more emotionally invested in bits of plastic, than your family. Before anyone tries to correct me, they are just bits of plastic - they have no emotion, no feelings, nothing. I would think the same of anything else, not just toys.


MILLYmo0se · 19/03/2023 14:06

'No, stop asking'


merlotlover · 19/03/2023 14:09

It may be worth a lot of money tell her you're saving it for your pension when you're older
Yanbu loads of people save toys, they'll be the antique gold mines when we're older especially boxed stuff


Namechangethisonetime · 19/03/2023 14:11

She’s cheeky af

Tell her when the time is right to sell the collection you’ll keep her in mind


JMSA · 19/03/2023 14:11

I'd be the same if my mother had kept me childhood Sindys and Barbies Blush


MrsMiddleMother · 19/03/2023 14:12

It's not irrational, they're your belongings and they make you happy. It doesnt matter if theyre toys or china teapots, just because theyre in storage doesnt mean someone else is entitled to it. Just say sorry cousin but I don't want to get them out or for them to be played with. Job done


DoctorManhattan · 19/03/2023 14:12

I know it’s not exactly the same, but I’m a 45yr old man and have a sizeable collection of graphic novels and limited run series which I keep sealed in plastic in a storage box upstairs kept out of sunlight. I’ve read them once or twice each but they’re pretty much as new condition as I’m always super careful with them. They weren’t bought as investments but I’m sure some may be worth more now than when they were new.

I’m very sentimental about them and intend to keep them in the condition they’re in. To all intents and purposes though, to everyone else in my family, they’re comics - and I’m sure it seems strange to them when some of the younger members have asked me if they can borrow them and I’ve politely declined. I have no desire to have them handed back dog-eared and maybe ripped or with greasy fingerprints over them.

Is it slightly irrational? Maybe.
Do I have any endgame where they will be handed down to someone? No idea.
Do I even take them out of the box once every year? Probably not.

But they’re my collection and it’s no different to me than someone who collects stamps or model cars or porcelain cups or whatever. I don’t feel I should be easygoing about maintaining their condition just because they’re seen as ‘only comics’. So by all means, stick to your guns - your Playmobil collection means something to you and isn’t just for entertainment.


viques · 19/03/2023 14:12

ExtraOnions · 19/03/2023 14:05

I find it a bit odd that you are more emotionally invested in bits of plastic, than your family. Before anyone tries to correct me, they are just bits of plastic - they have no emotion, no feelings, nothing. I would think the same of anything else, not just toys.

Diamonds are lumps of squished coal, pearls are grains of sand covered in oyster spit (or poo) not sure which, the Mona Lisa is some bits of ground down earth mixed with oil and spread on some canvas. All in the eye of the beholder.


NHSmummy84 · 19/03/2023 14:13

Just tell her that you're a collector!


LookItsMeAgain · 19/03/2023 14:14

Berthatydfil · 19/03/2023 13:21

Hi cousin - im not sure i was clear enough, my collection is not up for sharing. I dont want to upset your dd but please respect my decision in this matter and dont ask again or I will have to be firm.

There's your response.


blackpinkinyourarea · 19/03/2023 14:14

They are yours to do with as you wish.
She is a CF!


AmyDudley · 19/03/2023 14:15

'Why did you hype DD up when you know she'll be disappointed? I'd already said I'm not giving mine away, so it was daft thing to do on your part. You can probably get reasonably priced sets on ebay if she wants some xx'


fandangodango · 19/03/2023 14:18

Seems like a terrible waste to not let kids play with it. Would you prefer lots of brand new plastic to be bought?


Soubriquet · 19/03/2023 14:18

Just say no OP. You’re allowed to say no to something that belongs to you.

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