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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I should get these free tickets?

268 replies

Purplepluhs292 · 16/03/2023 09:08

I was given a family voucher for an activity for Christmas. DH couldn't make it due to work commitments and DD did want to do it so DS and I went with my SIL and nephew.

The company films the activity on a go pro. None of us wanted the video but we went to the reception to watch the videos afterwards just for fun. DNs camera hadn't recorded the activity so the company have said he can come back another time with an accompanying adult to do it again.

Now baring in mind the original tickets were my chritmas gift, I didn't ask my SIL for any money for them and DN didn't actually want the video AIBU to think SIL should give the replacement tickets to me?

They're not designated to any particular name, they've just been sent to SIL email account. I know DH would like to do the activity and DS would love to do it again.

OP posts:
DevantMaJardin · 16/03/2023 09:10

YABU and massively grabby. The company gave those tickets so DN and an accompanying adult could come back. SIL bought the tickets in the first place. I think you'll be embarrassing yourself if you ask for the second set of free tickets.

Busy77 · 16/03/2023 09:13

Where does it say the SIL bought the tickets in the first place?

IamnotSethRogan · 16/03/2023 09:13

No the tickets were given to DN so he could film it. It would be unreasonable of you to claim they're yours.

Gymrabbit · 16/03/2023 09:13

DevantMaJardin

Sil didn’t buy the tickets at all.
they were OP’s Christmas present and sil and her son were invited along because OPs family couldn’t go.

ApolloandDaphne · 16/03/2023 09:14

The free tickets weren't offered to you though. They were offered to your DN so you shouldn't get them. Don't be so greedy.

RobertsRadio · 16/03/2023 09:18

I think you should ask SIL if you could have the tickets for reasons you have outlined on here. If she says No, then I think you will have to accept that, even though in the circumstances you describe If I was SIL I would have offered them to you so that your DH and DS could go back.

mollibu · 16/03/2023 09:18

Stop being so grabby- they weren't offered to you!

Your DH wanting to do the activity and your DS wanting to go again is irrelevant - you would have to pay to go again if DN's camera did work for the activity anyway!

MajorCarolDanvers · 16/03/2023 09:20

They weren't offered to you.

You are being a grabby CF

SaltyGod · 16/03/2023 09:21

Reverse?

fairgame84 · 16/03/2023 09:23

The tickets are basically to compensate DN for his go pro not working. They are his.

Thingsthatgo · 16/03/2023 09:24

No, they were not given to you. If DN had won the tickets at the event would you still feel they were rightfully yours?

DysmalRadius · 16/03/2023 09:24

It would be nice of her to at least offer them to you - as it stands, from your family activity, your son will have done it once, your husband not at all and your nephew (who wasn't the originally recipient) twice! But I don't think I would ask in your shoes as it would be too awkward!

Blossomtoes · 16/03/2023 09:26

I’m with you @Purplepluhs292. If I were your sil it would never occur to me to keep the tickets, particularly since she only got to go because your husband couldn’t.

ChateauMargaux · 16/03/2023 09:26

Explain your position to your SIL. It was your gift and you kindly invited your SIL and DN to participate..

Dear SIL... what luck that we were given two extra tickets because DN's go pro didn't work, this means that DH can go after all.. Can you forward the email to DH please?

FrogsWormsandButterflies · 16/03/2023 09:28

ChateauMargaux · 16/03/2023 09:26

Explain your position to your SIL. It was your gift and you kindly invited your SIL and DN to participate..

Dear SIL... what luck that we were given two extra tickets because DN's go pro didn't work, this means that DH can go after all.. Can you forward the email to DH please?

This is so rude, the free tickets are to compensate for the camera not working, they are for OPs DN

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 16/03/2023 09:29

Wow, YABVU

The tickets were given to DN not you. I thought you were going to say you should be his accompanying adult (which would be a bit odd, but maybe) not that DN should have his tickets taken off him altogether. That’s just really mean to a child - even if he is a teen

Blossomtoes · 16/03/2023 09:30

they are for OPs DN

Who only got to go in the first place through OP’s generosity. Keeping them is da piss take.

Original poster
Purplepluhs292 · 16/03/2023 09:32

I don't think I'm being grabby at all.

The tickets are expensive (£100 each). I didn't ask for any contribution to them doing the activity. I drove a 4 hour round trip to get us all there, no fuel contribution either.

It seems to me the polite thing to do for SIL to ask if DH wants the free tickets. It's 100% what I'd do if the roles were reversed.

OP posts:
ShapesAndNumbers · 16/03/2023 09:34

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Haraebo · 16/03/2023 09:34

There are some really rude people on MN.

I don't think it would be unreasonable to have a word with your SIL. Maybe ask her if she was planning on using the tickets, as your husband would love to use them if not.

I think that puts the ball in her court and you've been polite about it.

Howabsolutelyfanfuckingtastic · 16/03/2023 09:35

Sorry I don't quite understand why your DN was offered the free tickets? You mentioned the company go pro but also DN's camera. Also since it was your Christmas gift voucher why wasn't the email with the free tickers sent to your email address?

Bookworm20 · 16/03/2023 09:36

Blossomtoes · 16/03/2023 09:26

I’m with you @Purplepluhs292. If I were your sil it would never occur to me to keep the tickets, particularly since she only got to go because your husband couldn’t.

This. SIL and DN got to go, for free, because your DH wasn't able to. They got to experience the activity for free and didn't want the video anyway, so thats totally irrelevant. The company offered the free replacement tickets because of the camera not working for DN. not having a video of it at the end of the day I am sure has not detracted in anyway from the enjoyment they had at experiencing it in the first place. Something they wouldn't have done if not for the OP's generosity.

These should be your free tickets. If I was your SIL and had had a lovely free day out with my child and were given 2 tickets I would automatically be giving them to you. It wouldn't cross my mind to keep them!

At the end of the day they only got to go because you offered it to them. It cost them nothing. Keeping the 2 additional tickets off the back of that would be pretty low of her in my opinion.

Original poster
Purplepluhs292 · 16/03/2023 09:36

I'm really struggling to see where I'm being greedy.

SIL has now had £400 worth of tickets for free but I'm greedy?

OP posts:
OrraBoralis · 16/03/2023 09:37

I'm not sure where reading comprehension has gone but it is not present in this thread! For the hard of thinking, read the OP, it was not SiL who bought the tickets they were a gift for OP. Her DH unfortunately could not attend and OP invited SiL and DN to take DH's ticket.

OP you are absolutely not being unreasonable, your DS and DH should have the tickets.

Singinghollybob · 16/03/2023 09:38

I agree your SIL should offer you the tickets.

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