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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To suddenly find this very unattractive

528 replies

Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:39

Am dating this guy.

Early days.

I offered to cook for him.

Asked him, is there anything you don’t eat.

Only veg he eats are peas and sweetcorn and tomatoes if they are in a sauce.

Wtaf? And no he’s not 5 he’s in his 40s

OP posts:
shouldhavetakenmorenotice · 13/03/2023 19:41

Stick to restaurants.

I have one of these in my house. I gave birth to him so I'm stuck with it for another ten years.

You don't have to - so please don't!

I presume there are plenty of other things that are worth keeping him around for?

AnneWhittle · 13/03/2023 19:41

that would be the end of any relationship for me

MulletAndMustache · 13/03/2023 19:42

It wouldn’t bother me. People have food preferences.

But if it bothers you, that’s all that matters. You can choose not date someone for any reason at all.

Original poster
Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:43

I love cooking 😭😭😭

OP posts:
FordCreek · 13/03/2023 19:43

Let him cook for you first.

Leeds2 · 13/03/2023 19:44

I would find this a bit off putting at the start of a relationship, as eating out and trying different things is something I love doing and I would see these dietary requirements a bit of a red flag. On the other hand, if he is lovely, and you like him otherwise, I guess you can try and work round it.
Do you know if he would eat, say, an Indian or Chinese takeaway?

mackthepony · 13/03/2023 19:44

Just a bit off-putting

Openyoureye · 13/03/2023 19:46

I like cooking but this doesn't put me off, so long as he eats most other foods.

Mateyduck · 13/03/2023 19:47

I like to cook, so he would be gone sadly.

Findyourneutralspace · 13/03/2023 19:47

It wouldn’t endear me but if he’s great in every way I’d go with it and gently try and find out what his issue is. If he’s never tried things you may be able to introduce them, if it’s that he’s had some kind of veg based trauma you might have to just make veg for you. At least it’s peas and sweetcorn. Make yourself some lovely veg and ping his peas in the microwave.

YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 13/03/2023 19:48

I’d find it hard as I love to cook and try loads of different foods - being restricted on foods would be tricky. Plus, I think I would find it unattractive or immature if I’m honest.

That said, if he was amazing in other ways, I’d probably give him a bit more time.

Original poster
Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:49

So roast chicken with roast potatoes, peas and sweet corn? 🙈🙈🙈

OP posts:
BigMandysBookClub · 13/03/2023 19:49

I think some people have had shit cooks for parents and aren't very imaginative in the kitchen. You could just cook as usual and see if he trys it, but have the peas and sweetcorn on standby. He might be more willing to eat it if it is well flavoured and presented.

Personally I wouldn't be that keen on someone who doesn't like veg. Cooking and growing it are my hobbies.

smellyflowers · 13/03/2023 19:50

Does he go out to eat? Do you like to go out to eat?

smellyflowers · 13/03/2023 19:50

Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:49

So roast chicken with roast potatoes, peas and sweet corn? 🙈🙈🙈

No you'd do peas and different veg for you?

Original poster
Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:50

I find it really really immature but - he seems to be quite mature in other ways.

OP posts:
Original poster
Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:51

Apparently he eats around the veg 🙈🙈

OP posts:
MultipleVeganPies · 13/03/2023 19:52

My husband was like this when we met

we’d often just have bread and cheese and wine 😁

he’s now an adventurous eater. He had just never been with anyone who was into food before

MultipleVeganPies · 13/03/2023 19:53

I think everyone is allowed a few unreasonable flaws 😁

FlightyFoxing · 13/03/2023 19:53

Adult fussy eaters absolutely give me the ick.

Betsyboo87 · 13/03/2023 19:53

Off putting to me. I don’t really understand fussy adult eaters. You’re an adult, just eat what you’re given. The only veg DS (aged 2) will eat is broccoli so we have it a lot. I don’t particularly like broccoli but I’m an adult so I just get on with it. If someone invited me for dinner then I wouldn’t dream of saying “well I don’t like broccoli”, I’d just eat it and be polite. Allergies, intolerances etc are different but if it is just preference then I can’t deal with it. I would wonder what else they would be picky about.

AffIt · 13/03/2023 19:55

Yes, OP, you're right - it is ridiculous that a grown adult only eats 'toddler vegetables', but this is MN and you'll have endless posters wanging on about ARFID and allergies and sensory issues and what have you.

For me, I don't want to have to cater to someone's endless fussiness and I'd personally be checking out.

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 13/03/2023 19:55

Besswess88 · 13/03/2023 19:51

Apparently he eats around the veg 🙈🙈

This is how i used to be! Just cook what you want and he can leave what he doesn't like

Elsanore · 13/03/2023 19:55

I would annoy me and possibly put me off.

It reminds me of my friend and her husband. He refused to eat onion and garlic and anything containing them at all. Their meals were massively restricted by this for years. Then they went on a group holiday and all different people took it in turns to cook with no idea about his dislikes, and he ate everything and cleared his plate every night "to be polite"! My mate didn't know whether to be pleased or fuming.

TomatoSandwiches · 13/03/2023 19:56

I like cooking so it would be a " sorry this won't work. " from me.

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