Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask when you had your first child..

208 replies

over30sclub · 01/03/2023 23:24

Disclaimer - not a real AIBU I couldn’t find another topic where you can vote

I’ve recently turned 30 and been TTC for a while (not happened yet :D) and it seems like every single person I know from school or in my age range had children ages ago (friends with children 10+ for example). All of my close friends have children - albeit younger - but I’m starting to think that I’m in the minority and I’ll be an older mum at the school gates, if and when it happens.

So.. I wanted to get a gauge outside of the small world that is my friends and Facebook, how many of you had your first child before 30??

YABU - I had my first child at 30+
YANBU - I had my first child younger than 30

Ps no judgment or one ups - neither is better or worse, I’m just curious to see the %
Pps I’m a semi regular poster - name changed as I picked a rubbish one before and was sick of it 😂

OP posts:
saltwater1985 · 02/03/2023 02:37
  1. Then 33 and 35. Am absolutely done now
Bepis · 02/03/2023 02:39

Had my first aged 20, then second at age 23. I'm 39 now with a 19 and 16 year old.

PinkPink1 · 02/03/2023 03:09

I’m 26 and pregnant with my first. My DP and I know quite a few people from school who have had dc (we were in the same school year but grew up in different parts of the country). My parents and grandparents were in their early-mid 20s when they had dc.

MaryShelley1818 · 02/03/2023 03:26

I was 39 with DS and 42 with DD. I was usually the oldest but only by a few years. All friends professionals so no babies in 20's apart from 1 person.

FourFour · 02/03/2023 03:42

33 and 39. Any sooner and I would not have been prepared. Financially, I wouldn't have been ready as well as I wanted to give my dc security. And my 20s were for me, career building, travelling and enjoying life with no commitments. In our circle all of our friends took the same route, it would have been very odd to do it in our 20s.

Trying2bemum · 02/03/2023 04:20

35 and 39 - my 9 week old baby girl is asleep on my chest here now.

Years of infertility and IVF. Eventual endometriosis diagnosis.

Hope you have a smooth conception and pregnancy journey x

Babyenroute · 02/03/2023 04:24

YABU, I am 33, just had my first child and we are the youngest in our antenatal group

Summer2424 · 02/03/2023 04:39

Hi @over30sclub i have a 5 month old baby and had her at 41 yrs old.

Beaniesmumsie · 02/03/2023 04:54

We started trying when I was 30. Had my first at 32 after three miscarriages, and my second at 33. All my mum friends are about the same age as me so I think having your first at your early 30s is pretty much the norm in my social circles

mathanxiety · 02/03/2023 05:17

First baby at 25. I was one of the youngest mothers when she started school. Last baby at 37, I was one of the oldest outside kindergarten.

JennyDarlingRIP · 02/03/2023 05:19

34, first of my group of friends from uni, but lots of friends from school who didn't go on to further education had their children much younger. I think people fall into two camps and neither is wrong

Roselilly36 · 02/03/2023 05:22

29 & 31

Dyslexicwonder · 02/03/2023 05:38

28 & 30 nearly 19 years ago.

Wishawisha · 02/03/2023 05:49

You don’t need a Mumsnet survey, the government produces statistics.

The most common age for women born in 1975 to give birth
was 31 years, an increase compared with 22 years for their mothers' generation born in 1949.
Half of women (50%) born in 1990 (the most recent cohort to reach age 30 years) remained childless by their 30th birthday; this is the first cohort where half remain childless by 30 years of age.

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/conceptionandfertilityrates/bulletins/childbearingforwomenbornindifferentyearsenglandandwales/2020

For what it’s worth, this obviously differs massively in different demographics.
Personally I know more women who become mothers in their forties than I do twenties. 30/31 would have been very young at the primary school my DC go to.

Cnidarian · 02/03/2023 05:52

Wishawisha · 02/03/2023 05:49

You don’t need a Mumsnet survey, the government produces statistics.

The most common age for women born in 1975 to give birth
was 31 years, an increase compared with 22 years for their mothers' generation born in 1949.
Half of women (50%) born in 1990 (the most recent cohort to reach age 30 years) remained childless by their 30th birthday; this is the first cohort where half remain childless by 30 years of age.

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/conceptionandfertilityrates/bulletins/childbearingforwomenbornindifferentyearsenglandandwales/2020

For what it’s worth, this obviously differs massively in different demographics.
Personally I know more women who become mothers in their forties than I do twenties. 30/31 would have been very young at the primary school my DC go to.

^ this. UK average is 30.9. I was 35 and 38

Danskekat · 02/03/2023 05:54

37 and 38. There are parents at our nursery gates from late 20s to early 50s.

Good luck!

ForeverMessy456 · 02/03/2023 06:02

I had my first at 32 - we also tried for 3-4 years with no joy and eventually went down the IVF route

Fooshufflewickjbannanapants · 02/03/2023 06:05

Just turned 23, 25,26,28 and 36

LT2 · 02/03/2023 06:36

pregnant at 30, mother at 31. I read recently that the average age has now risen to 31!

Mistymoonsinastarrysky · 02/03/2023 06:45

When I had DD in 1979 I was 25 and classed as an ‘elderly primip’!

Climbingthelaundrymountain · 02/03/2023 06:46

I had my first at 19, second at 22 and 3rd at 26. Plenty of my friends are just beginning to have children now, we are 35, and plenty haven't started yet.

LuckyThatMyBreastsAreSmallAndHumble · 02/03/2023 06:48

33 and 36

ScrumpyTree · 02/03/2023 06:52

27 and we were the first in our circle of friends by a couple of years.

Now 38 and 2 have newborns and another is pregnant. So we're definitely the odd ones out although our DC love seeing the babies.

Friends careers are a lot more advanced/impressive and I missed out on a few holidays.

TheGlitterFairy · 02/03/2023 06:53

42 here for DS. Took 10 years and lots of fertility treatment….so I’m positively ancient now and will be 46/47 when he goes to school!! Ha! Good luck with your journey!

shakeitoffsis · 02/03/2023 06:53

29 and 32

Swipe left for the next trending thread