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AIBU?

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Original poster

Set his cheating message as his screen saver

485 replies

Tothemoonandbackx · 26/02/2023 01:38

So my lying, cheating.....now (not that he knows it yet) EX is snoring away beside me. We have the same make and model of phone, and I'd plugged mine in earlier to charge, but didn't realise he'd taken mine out to charge his up while I was in the shower. A notification popped up, on what I thought was my phone plugged in, I went to read the message and saw it was from another women, talking about how amazing their kiss was, completely baffled, I soon realised it was his phone. Turns out not only have they shared this amazing kiss, but they've also spent nights together while he's been away at work. To say I'm heartbroken is an understatement, anger has over ridden me but I want to play it cool before I dump his sorry, pathetic lying cheating fucking ass!!!! I've set his screen saver to the last message she sent, so there's no way he can deny it, I'm waiting for him to eventually see it in the morning, am I crazy, or do I wake him up and kick him out now?????

OP posts:
SunshineAndFizz · 26/02/2023 17:37

So sorry this has happened.

But soooo much respect for how you've handled it. Best of luck x x

Thesharkradar · 26/02/2023 17:59

men who work away a lot are often looking for a woman with her own home, he's spent all that time working on you, grooming you to let him move in so that he can have all his home comforts for free and have extra fun while he's working away
but he blew it, he was lazy and didnt cover his tracks properly
what a conniving POS😡

SerafinasGoose · 26/02/2023 17:59

Nighttoremember · 26/02/2023 17:06

Absolutely not true
I had a thread on here re my own infidelity and was absolutely slaughtered, called an abuser and advised that by sleeping with AP I had raped his wife (because her consent wasn't fully informed).

Show quote history

I've seen the ludicrous protestation that the OW is colluding in rape before. No, affairs are not a great thing to do and I've not seen anyone on this site seriously claim they are. But this particular objection is offensive.

The legal bar is enthusiastic consent, not informed consent. There is a wealth of difference.

It's an insult to women like me who have really been raped, and it boils my piss.

gonnabeok · 26/02/2023 18:02

Omg this is exactly how I found out my ex was cheating too!.only I was on holiday of all places! Kick him to touch. He deserves everything he gets! But take advantage of any extra time you have before he knows you know!

autienotnaughty · 26/02/2023 18:12

Good for you Op. Set the bar high!

Itgoesalittlesomethinglikethis · 26/02/2023 18:27

You've handled this brilliantly OP. Wishing you happiness xx

MrsPerfect12 · 26/02/2023 18:27

Well done OP! Nothing wrong with how you've done things.

MonkeyMindAllOverAround · 26/02/2023 18:37

Wow, I really like your style and how much dignity you displayed. You may say it was because you didn’t want to be late for work but, it takes some guts to hold yourself so well under such circumstances. keep it on.

Allgoodusernamesweretaken · 26/02/2023 18:54

Would love to know the follow-up, if there is one?

StaunchMomma · 26/02/2023 18:56

There are always a few twunts who put the boot in, OP - IGNORE THEM!

I think you've handled yourself really well.

Hope you're feeling Ok.x.

Twilight7777 · 26/02/2023 19:00

Bucket of cold water on his head! Doesn’t deserve to sleep well in my opinion! And book a solicitors visit before you throw the water on him!

Twilight7777 · 26/02/2023 19:01

Toffeeappler · 26/02/2023 01:45

Can you make it his social media profile oic as well??

Do this too OP that way he can’t deny it

TimeforacuppaT · 26/02/2023 19:02

Can’t fault you for how you’ve handled it.

ThereIbledit · 26/02/2023 19:07

OP I think you are an absolute legend and that this should go in Classics.

daydreaming4 · 26/02/2023 19:13

No you are not crazy you are hurt. However don't let your reaction get out of hand beyond anything more drastic than that screensaver and telling him to pack. You can find a cheat anywhere it's good that your not prepared to put up with one. He certainly isn't worth losing your shit over and getting into any trouble over so short, calm and to the point is what is needed he will probably be more flabbergasted at calm and clear than inflating his ego with drama he may get a giggle out.of later.

TeaFagsand · 26/02/2023 19:14

I absolutely love your response!

Madam, you are a womzn of intelligence and class.

TeaFagsand · 26/02/2023 19:20

TeaFagsand · 26/02/2023 19:14

I absolutely love your response!

Madam, you are a womzn of intelligence and class.

Why don't you pack his bags for him to help him on his way? And don't forget to change the locks. Do it yourself and save a pzcket: it's not difficult.

MyEasterEggs · 26/02/2023 19:22

Classy lady. You’ve handled this beautifully. Stay strong 💪🏻

Rainbowsparkles29 · 26/02/2023 19:31

Sending you solidarity OP. Don't listen to the minority on here who want to kick you down. You're doing great and it sounds like you've been very dignified in your response. Hope you're ok this pm and lots of people here to give moral support if you need it xx

LongLostTeacher · 26/02/2023 20:00

So dignified OP, well done, I think you’ve been amazing. Flowers

Beach11 · 26/02/2023 20:08

Hope he has left without issue & you are ok x

GrinAndVomit · 26/02/2023 20:13

Beach11 · 26/02/2023 20:08

Hope he has left without issue & you are ok x

Ditto.

letthemalldoone · 26/02/2023 20:47

@Tothemoonandbackx would like to hear from you to know if you're handling this ok xx

louise5754 · 26/02/2023 21:19

@JocelynBurnell His do you know this is the same guy?

FictionalCharacter · 26/02/2023 21:26

Well at least when he’s fucked off you won’t have anyone unplugging your phone to charge theirs!