AIBU To have kicked my friend and her daughter out at 8pm

[Terriblefriend07]

I will try not to drip feed, so might be a
long post. I have name changed. My friend and her 4 year old daughter was due to stay this weekend.
my DC is has complex health condition which leaves them in hospital when ever they spike a fever or unwell. We try to live life normally the best we can. We have always had rules that If you are sick you do not enter our house.
my friend is 100 percent aware of the situation.

they arrived this evening with in a few seconds friend announces she has a wee bit of a cough ( I could deal this ) but it was very clear when I heard her that I was a very active new cough and she did not look well. Full of a virus / hacky cough / snot everywhere and bright cheeks. Was miserable and screaming. She then vomited in my hallway and I checked temp which was 39 ! I am an awful friend but I told them they had to leave. The only options were to travel back 3 hours or to go to a local hotel I have them the choice and I would pay for the hotel. I’m angry, she’s angry , we have had a bit of a big fall out and I feel like a terrible friend.

No probs. Worked it out in the end !!

Even if her daughter had a slight cough when they left she really should have stayed home.
I would never dream of taking my kids to stay at someone else’s house (especially if a member of the family had a complex health condition) if they were showing signs of being unwell.

You had no choice OP

And generous to offer to pay for the hotel

OP, I have been in your child’s situation and believe me, you did the only thing you could. Some people just don’t understand, and that makes them lucky, because they’ve never had to go through it themselves. As others here have said, your job here is to be a good parent not a good friend. Your friend may be upset, but she is an adult and doesn’t need protecting from that at the expense of a medically vulnerable child. You did what was necessary, which isn’t always pleasant. But that’s life and parenthood.

OP, please ignore idiots like @SchoolTripDrama who have absolutely no experience living with an immunocompromised child. All the responses “couldn’t you have just let them stay one night” etc clearly have no idea of the implications of what is a minor illness to most kids can have on a sick child. You did the right thing- you HAVE to protect your own kid. 💐

I have this kid. The sick one.

you are not unreasonable. At all.

@SchoolTripDrama that is completely untrue re in hospital. Aside from the obvious hospitals have sick people in them for children with long term conditions they need a life. As parents we know that we cannot eliminate all but you can limit. And sharing a home with a visibly sick child is not a risk you take.

There is no scenario where the friend isn’t to blame. It’s on her. Entirely.