My baby's dad (a story)
Is 15 years my senior. Were together 2 years, Had unprotected sex with me the whole time knowing I wouldn't have an abortion. When I fell pregnant (told him in the car) he drove like a maniac cause he was stressed/ didn't want a baby (lol). Drove to his flat, made it clear he wants me to have an abortion to which I got angry. He then followed me round his flat into every room while I was trying to get away from him to calm down. Started getting nasty saying I'd be a shit mum, nothing like his first baby's mum. Omg my life sounds like an episode of eastenders. This nastiness carried on for a few weeks over text & email (because I blocked his texts). Said he doesn't want anything to do with me or the baby. Basically a bullying campaign into getting me to have an abortion. Eventually this stopped and he apologised, said he would change bla bla. Still continued to argue with me (bout various other things) during my pregnancy. Said he didn't want me to live with him. Over xmas an ex popped up to me asking bout my life etc explained my situation and he said he would look after me bla bla. Baby's dad found out and, sounds a bit dramatic but, literally held me captive in his car. (I'm 6/7 months pregnant at this point). Was banging his hand on the steering wheel, beeping, writing "slag" on the windscreen condensation being a general cunt. Went for a drive and again drove like a maniac. I ended up just jumping out the car in traffic and walking into a park, he followed me got out the car and wouldn't let me past I'm shouting at the top of his lungs that I'm a slag. Wouldnt let me go home for over an hour, I was walking round just tryna shake him. A car full of boys started hollering at me from their car and pulled up just in front of me so I got scared and turned around (towards baby dad) and said please leave me alone I'm scared of these guys to which he went up to them saying "you want some of her? Come get some, she's pregnant". This whole saga ended with me just sitting on the pavement because I could no longer walk my hips were hurting and eventually he let me walk home (was parked outside my house when I got there but didn't do anything). He didn't tell anyone he was having a baby the whole time I was pregnant. Turned up at my birth causing such a scene outside that the midwives thought I was in an abusive relationship and wouldn't leave me alone with him. (He was making a scene because I didn't want him at the birth, something that was already planned and discussed and he was fine with). He eventually told his mum after we'd registered our daughter when she was 1 month old that he had a baby. Since having her he's been useless. I'm a single mum obvs so I do all the work but he didn't contribute financially for the first 4 months. Uses the fact he pays me £100 a month (eventually) against me. Argues with me in front of our daughter and in public. Doesn't really show her any attention when he is with her. Doesn't ask about her or how she's doing when we're on good terms, but when we're on bad he asks about her constantly like he's just doing it to keep me talking to him.
Theres more but honestly I'm grateful for anyone to have even read all of that bollocks ^
Reason for this post is, I told him he can see her whenever he wants but that I don't want him to have her on his own. He went ballistic, turned up at my house when I wasn't there, crying and shouting in my driveway, slagged me off to my mum and family. Told loads of lies like he always does. Ended with him eventually agreeing to leave (I was home with daughter at this point) but he kept putting his leg in the door to stop me shutting it. Threw him out the house, he came charging back in fucked my hand up pushing the door on it screaming in my face not to do that to him bla bla
Do I really not have a right to tell this man I don't trust him alone with my daughter? AIBU? I don't think he's a bad dad as such, when he is with her, I just think he's not that bothered & also I'm not sure what lengths he's prepared to go to to piss me off