Am I a heartless wife or is dh milking it?

[AmillionReasons]

Following on from the dressing gown of doom thread which was hilarious, I need your opinion! AIBU to be immensely irritated by dh laying around after his vasectomy? Don't get me wrong i have been incredibly senstive to how he will.be feeling etc and he hasn't had to lift a finger. It has been 3 days though now of me running around after him, our dcs, cleaning the house and doing the school runs. He doesn't even get up to make a cup of tea, i told him to put the kettle on and he looked put out! He is waddling around like a lost duckling (that is of course when he chooses to get up which is rarely!) Is this normal?
The new kind of surgery is keyhole and no stitches, just a plaster. I realise there is a little swelling and dull aches etc but I didn't get to rest after birthing two babies, and having stitches too, life went on. He haa checked the area and it isn't infected or anything. I have been very supportive for 3 days but feel he should at least be doing some light activities by now. He is laying around playing computer games, I am probably insensitive but it is irritating me! AIBU?

My boss had a vasectomy. At lunchtime and was back in work that afternoon.

YANBU.

I'd give him until tomorrow. is he off work for this long for a vasectomy?!

He's taking the piss. My husband just carried on as normal while being careful to protect the area - particularly from the kids who seemed to make a point of throwing themselves on to his lap!

Mine went back to work the next day and he's a real baby

Yes, that's my experience of men I know who've had vasectomies. Only the people with manual/physical jobs took more than a few hours off. I actually ran into one friend walking home from the clinic (admittedly only about a quarter of a mile...)

I am 6 days post op total hysterectomy that took 4 hours under GA as endo adhered womb to bowel and had 20 fibroids removed and my womb was 150g. Today I have washed up, made breakfast, been to the coop, made lunch for me and DC, lit a fire, washed up and dried up and painted a blackboard. Your DH is taking the mick love!

He's taking the micky. DH just carried on as normal, just worked from home for a couple of days (90min journey in each direction otherwise).

He needs to get a grip.

yeah, nah, milking time is over matey. . .

Yes he has the full week off work, and says when he goes back next week he will "have to work from home for the week." The sheer thought of this act going on the whole week. 😡 He tells me there are aches and he can feel it inside, and that it hurt him to go to the toilet! I know I sound and am bitter but when I gave birth I just got on with it afterwards! I was up walking about an hour later after a very long painful traumatic time, why does he need all of this time? I don't mean to sound competitive as realise everybody can deal with different levels of pain etc. There I go I'm being insensitive again.

Oh dear - he is milking it big time! My OH had his, then hopped on a train and joined me on our singing holiday.

Work colleagues were back in the same or next day; hubs was off work for a week but that was due to the nature of his job. But as DD had chicken pox and very kindly gave him it too he spent the week looking after himself and a spotty 5-yr old. I stayed home for the first day as he'd had a bad reaction to the anaesthetic & had to be given a general but after that he was on his own. Yours is taking the piss!

DH is the king of the dressing gown of doom and he was back marathon training by day 3 so I vote for he's taking the pass too.

Given that I went to Asda and then soft play on my way home from hospital 2 days post c section, yes I’d say he’s being a baby.

He'll regret it when his pathetic behaviour gives you the ick and you never want to shag him again.

I had laparoscopic surgery for endometriosis and was back at work after a week

He has been really moody too. He said the thought of thr finality of it is taking him time to get used to! Again this further annoyed me. I had to get used to all of the changes to my body over night yet he cannot deal with this.

Tell him if he carries on like this, it'll all be in vain. This isn't attractive behaviour 😁

Some of the stories on here make me cringe inside out. No op, you're not heartless, your husband is embarrassing. How anyone puts up with something this ridiculous is beyond me.

Dh is a wet lettuce, had a vasectomy and was only whinging for one day

Yabu OP

Of the two guys I know who had one, one was back up and about after about 36 hours, although his doc said ‘light duties only’ (which basically meant no lifting anything heavy; he could drive after 24 hours).

The other one ruptured something and ended up back in hospital after a week.

In any sense, the cast-iron unbreakable rule seems to be no sex for seven days. It doesn’t sound like he’s in any danger of getting a shag anytime soon so that’s probably taking care of itself.

He can't even make food for the dcs, the worst part is be is taking odd painkillers but if it is that bad he should be taking them regularly. I've told him he needs to go to and see the doctor as this isn't normal. He then parrots they've said it can take a week blah blah blah.

Tell him he’s wasted his time having the op as you’ll never want sex with him again

He's pathetic. I dropped mine off at work the day he had it done. He was fine.

Your husband sounds absolutely pathetic and insufferable. Yuck.

Does anyone know if they can bend to get things and then it is safe to do so? He is weary around that. If he so much as gets up he has this wounded animal look. The self pitying is ridiculous. I am close to making a doctors appt for him.